Finney: how do boobs work

* Gwen left the groupchat *

Finney: oh

* Vance added Gwen to the groupchat *

Vance: let's talk about how tomorrow is the first day of school

Finney: no

Finney: how do boobs work

Finney: Bruce

Bruce: WHY ME.

Robin: excuse you guys but me, finns dad and Gwen are trying to watch my little pony

Finney: WHY ARE YOU WATCHING MY LITTLE PONY

Robin: because your dad wanted to

Vance: THE BLAKE FAMILY GETS WEIRDER??

Finney: Bruce

Bruce: NO LEAVE ME ALONE

Finney: tell me Bruce

Vance: WHY WOULD BRUCE KNOW

Finney: he does I know he does

Griffin: alright Finney I think it's time we take a drive

Finney: YAY WHERE

Griffin: a mental hospital

Finney: NO NOT AGAIN

Billy: 😮 AGAIN

Vance: Bruce just fell in the shower

Finney: see if he had just told me

Vance: NO

Bruce: I WASNT EVEN SHOWERING I WAS TRYING TO GET THE COMB TO COMB VANCES HAIR

Robin: and you slipped

Gwen: this groupchat is full of very.. special.. people

Finney: AWEE thank you!!

Gwen: right

Bruce: so all of us are in 8th grade except for griffin and Gwen

Griffin: can we talk abt how Vance is in your grade when he's supposed to be in 10th

Vance: how about no

Finney: would you rather talk about how boobs work bc I'm dying to know

Vance: I have a migraine

Finney: THAT WASNT AN OPTION

Vance: GOOGLE EXISTS FOR A REASON FINNEY

Finney: oh good idea

Vance: what the hell is French

Robin: what 😕

Vance: WHY IS IT ON MY SCHEDULE

Robin: because you signed up to take it

Billy: oh cool I'm in French too maybe I'll be in your class

Vance: is it too late to switch

Billy: 😕

Griffin: 😛

Billy: I'm stealing your bike.

Griffin: NO

Griffin: WHY DID MY GARAGE DOOR JUST OPEN

Billy: I need your bike.

Griffin: GIVE IT BACK

Billy: baiiii 😛

Griffin: the player gets played

Vance: SOMEONE ANSWER ME IS IT TOO LATE TO SWITCH FROM FRENCH

Robin: WHAT WOULD U SWITCH INTO???

Vance: AUSTRALIA IDK

Finney: do you mean Australian

Finney: oh sweet sweet Vance 😕

Vance: WHAT

Finney: I don't have the heart to tell you

Finney: yes Vance, go learn Australian

Robin: me and finney are taking Spanish

Griffin: don't you already know Spanish

Robin: yeah now I can get an A

Griffin: 😮 THATS SO SMART

Vance: THATS ALLOWED????

Vance: LET ME TAKE GERMAN THEN

Bruce: HOW DO YOU KNOW GERMAN????

Vance: don't ask questions you don't want to know Bruce

Finney: 👀

Robin: 👀

Finney: alright Vance where were you september 1st 1939

Vance: I AM NOT A NAZI

Robin: HOW DID YOU NOT MOVE UP A GRADE FOR SO LONG

Vance: no we aren't having this discussion

Robin: YOU'RE LITERALLY SO SMART AND SOMEHOW KNEW THAT DATE

Robin: waiiit

Robin: wait..

Vance: birdy go tweet tweet somewhere else

Robin: EXCUSE YOU

Vance: don't kill me I have so much to live for

Billy: bffr the only thing you have to live for is Bruce

Vance: 😲 I HAVE MY MOM.

Robin: I wish I could've seen your jaw drop like that in person

Vance: 🤨

Robin: why are you looking at me like that

Vance: NOTHING..

Robin: I MEANT FROM SHOCK

Robin: WHAT DO YOU KNOW THAT I DONT

Vance: NOTHING....

Robin: BRUCE HELP ME OUT

Vance: Bruce is unconscious

Finney: WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM

Vance: WOAH I DID NOTHING

Vance: HE SLIPPED ON THE RUG AND FELL

Billy: HE COULD BE DEAD

Vance: no he's good trust

Billy: BUT

Vance: go deliver papers

Billy: now that you told me to I don't want to

Finney: guys let's play black jack

Gwen: NO.

Gwen: DO YOU NOT REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED LAST TIME

Gwen: THIS IS LITERALLY WHY DONNA DOESNT COME OVER ANYMORE

Vance: it was an accident

Gwen: ???!?! NO

Robin: Vance you lost all your money to the dealer and chased billy around the house

Griffin: then tried to stuff him in the freezer

Vance: keyword: TRIED

Billy: Vance is so abusive

Vance: HEY NOW.

Vance: YOU PROVOKED ME

Billy: 😒

Finney: were you provoked when you dislocated Bruce's arm

Vance: THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT AND YOU KNOW IT

Griffin: 😛

Vance: STOP I WAS JUST TRYING TO PICK HIM UP

Gwen: BY HIS ARM????

Vance: ...yes

Gwen: 😐

* Gwen left the groupchat *

Finney: Gwen was not amused

Vance: AND YOU THINK I WAS???

Robin: yes

Vance: MY FRIEND WAS ROLLING AROUND ON THE GROUND IN PAIN

Vance: dont say anything about the word friend I'm not having it today

Finney: I WASNT GOING TO SAY ANYTHING

Vance: not you, the people

Robin: and Gwen was the weird one?

Bruce: would you guys still love me if I was a leaf

Finney: ..Did you hit your head when you slipped

Vance: this is normal

Robin: yes Bruce I'd still love you if you were a leaf

Bruce: what about a stick

Griffin: I fear you've reached your final limit

Billy: did you take your medications today Bruce

Bruce: WHAT MEDICATIONS????!

Billy: testosterone

Robin: FINNEY'S SMILE JUST DROPPED IM LAUGHING SO HARD

Finney: STOP THIS MADNESS

Billy: why are you guys ALWAYS together

Billy: AND BRUCE AND VANCE

Vance: Bruce's house is warm mine is freezing

Billy: THAT

Vance: THE FLOORS ARE COLD BILLY

Billy: just heat them

Vance: where am I meant to get the money to do that William

Finney: yeah William

Billy: I FEEL PRESSURED

Vance: Bruce is eating raw spahgetti noodles

Robin: FINNEY DOES THAT

Vance: THATS NOT NORMAL

Finney: YES IT IS LEAVE US ALONE

Bruce: YEAH VANCE

Vance: IF YOU SHOW UP TO LUNCH TMR WITH RAW SPAGHETTI NOODES I WILL NOT CONTINUE TO COME TO SCHOOL

Bruce: WHAT AM I MEANT TO EAT

Vance: ?!?! COOKED SPAGHETTI NOODLES

Bruce: it isn't the same

Vance: the migraine is back

AUTHORS NOTE:

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