Frank and I walked hand in hand to my class room on the first day after the holidays. I opened the door and Stephen and Chantelle looked in my direction and got excited.

'Babes!' they squealed and rushed to hug me. I let go of Franks hand to hug them.

'I missed you guys!" I said, hugging them both.

I saw that Joe had a hat on and Mitchell was chasing him around trying get it off him.

'Joe why do you have a hat on?' I asked

'please don't take it off' he said, still running away. I raised an eyebrow at Frank telling him to get the hat. Frank tried but it was harder than it looked.

'Mitchell' said Frank, gesturing to come here. Mitchell went over to Frank and they whispered about something. Mitchell nodded and continued to chase Joe. Then he chased him next to where Frank was standing and Frank grabbed the hat.

Underneath it was a haircut that made him look like a mushroom. There were gasps from the whole room. Mitchell, Frank and Rem-Dogg were shitting themselves with laughter.

I was shocked. 'wait, that is strange as fuck' I said

'why, babe?' Said Frank

'well, Alfie-' I started to say but that was when Alfie came in.

'right if anyone laughs their getting expelled' he said and he pulled off his hat to reveal the same hairstyle as Joe.

'I told you it was strange' I said,

'our dad did it' said Alfie

'he almost made me cut my hair but I was not going to let anyone with scissors lay a finger on my hair' I said, protective of my hair.

'it's not fair' whined Alfie 'why didn't you have to get your hair cut?'

'well, for starters I'm the only girl since mum left, dad knows I love my hair and I'm the one with a boyfriend-' I said but Alfie cut me off.

'actually, I have girlfriend. Miss Gulliver. She changed her relationship status to in a relationship and we kissed at the end of term party. So suck on that little sister' he said, putting up his middle finger at me. Frank stepped infront of me protectively and glared at him.

'sorry, Grayson' he said.

'thats what I thought' said Frank, putting his arm around me.

'right sit down' said Alfie, 'Frank, leave'

This time I glared at Alfie. 'I swear to God, Alfie-' I threatened.

'Calm down, Beccs. I'll leave.' he said. He kissed me on the cheek and left.

'you have a lovely boyfriend' said Alfie, sarcastically. I flipped him off and sat down, arms folded.

We had a boring lesson and I was annoyed and annoying to Alfie all lesson because I felt like it.

Finally, the bell for break rang and I was the first one out of that door. I heard Alfie sigh at me but I really didn't care. I wanted to find Frank. I don't know why but I felt like I needed his comfort. I found him waiting for me ,as usual, on the bench under the stairs.

'Frank' I said. He looked up with a smile.

'I'm sorry for Alfie, by the way' I said,

'don't worry' he said, putting his arm around my shoulder. We went down the corridor and some girl went next to Frank and said 'why are you with that slut' and winked at him.

I turned to face her in seconds. 'Hey!' I shouted. It was a girl in the year below.

'What did you say, Bitch?' I said, angrily

'n-nothing' stuttered the girl. Now that she's looking me in the eyes she's not as bold now.

'Now you listen to me, you little shit. If you say anything, and I mean ANYTHING, about me or my boyfriend again, I will peel off your eyebrows and stick them to your arse' I told her, intimidatingly.

'I-I'm s-sorry, Becca' she said

'thats Rebecca to you, hoe' I said, and turned back to Frank

'you're so hot when you defend yourself and me' he whispered in my era with a smirk.

I kissed his cheek. I would do anything to protect him and he would do the same to me.

We were chilling with his gang. When Joe comes up to me to ask me something.

'Becca, are you busy?' asked Joe

'Yeah, she is' growled Frank. The whole gang glared at Joe. Because of Frank, they were all protective over me.

'Sorry, Joe' I said, apologetically 'ask me in class'. Joe ran off.

'what did he want' said Frank, still watching him.

'I don't know. Might be something serious because he would never come up to me when I'm with you. He's really scared of you' I said. Frank laughed.

The bell went for the next lesson. I got up and swung my bag over my shoulder.

'I'm going to the shop, do you want anything?' said Frank

'can I have a pack of gum and a Diet Coke please' I said, smiling.

'ok' he said, he kissed my head.

'I love you' I said

'I love you too' he said

I went to class.

'what did you want Joe?' I said

'I just wanted to tell you something because I think I can trust you' he said

'You can trust me. What is it?' I asked

'I think-' Joe started to say

Then Alfie came in. he scrunched up a piece of paper and threw it at me so I through it back at him.

'Guys, I need you to bring in your pyjamas on Friday' he said

'Are we having a sleepover? Can I be the little spoon?' asked Chantelle, sexually

'uh no, we're learning swimming safety' he said

'why? We live in Watford, we aint gonna drown in a flood' said Mitchell

'yeah, well, you're not' said Alfie 'That is one advantage of living in a caravan: if there is a flood, you can just move to higher ground'

'Well, at least I dont look like and Amish rent boy' said Mitchell.

I laughed and Alfie scoffed. 'good one Mitchell' I said

'whatever' said Alfie 'Look, we're learning swimming safety so we can enter the swimming gala'

'but we never do the gala!' whined Joe

'well, we do now' said Alfie 'and we're gonna wipe that smug look off of Pickwells face, and in doing so, win me a cash bet and you know what that means' Alfie did a drum roll

'group nandos trip on me!' he said. Everyone cheered.

'All we have to do is beat Pickwell in one thing and I reckon we've got a chance this year because there is a new event: synchronised diving.' said Alfie 'It's someones opportunity to be the next Tom Daley' I saw Stephen getting hyped up.

'Fierce, count me in. I'll be like usher with gills. #werk' said Stephen, hyped

'now you need to pick a partner' said Alfie. when I heard that I put my head down so I wouldn't be seen.

Frank came in but I didn't realise until Alfie said 'Grayson what are you doing'

'just giving these to your sister, you dick' he said, putting the Diet Coke and gum on my desk. I smiled at him. He came over to me and I said 'I love you'

'I love you too' he said, kissing my cheek. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that Alfie was disgusted.

Frank left and I zoned out.

I zoned in when Mitchell said 'I'll do it for a beer at nandos'

'done' he said

'can I have a beer?' I asked. Alfie ignored me.

'now, on a seperate issue, I need to do something rather special for the old ball-and-chain' said Alfie

Everyone looked confused.

'My girlfriend, Miss Gulliver' Alf said 'we had a little bit of a lovers tiff in the staffroom'

'she isn't you fucking girlfriend, just leave the poor woman alone' I said

'yes she is' said Alfie

*friday comes*

It's Friday and we have to do swimming safety. We all got changed into our pyjamas. Chantelle tried to go out naked but Alfie told her to put some clothes on. I had booty shorts on and Franks football shirt that he let me borrow. I don't sleep in anything other than shorts, a bra and Franks shirts so they are my pyjamas. I steal all of Franks shirts and hoodies.

Anyway, Chantelle, Jing and I walked out to the poolside where everyone was waiting.

'look its my XXL Conny' said Mitchell, pretending the verruca sock was his dick

'that's a verruca sock' said Joe. Mitchell threw it behind him in disgusted. It went on Stephen and he screamed.

'Oi, sir, where's the lifeguard? She better be a sort.' said Mitchell

'don't worry mate. they always are' reassured Alfie

We heard a whistle and looked behind Alfie. A fat women came towards us. she was meant to be our lifeguard. She had a crutch.

'oi, Jing get your harpoon out. I've spotted a whale' said Mitchell

'sit-down, you grubby little toads!' she shouted at us. We all sat down.

'Hi. I'm Mr Wickers' Alfie introduced himself

'You too' said the woman

'I'm the form teacher' said Alfie

'sit!' she shouted at him. He dropped to the floor.

'my name is Joy' said the women 'Before you begin, a couple of ground rules. I don't like children but I do like my kit. And take extra special care of Thomas' she poineted to the dummy sitting on the bench next to us.

'oh the dummy's got a name' said Alfie, quietly

'Rules: No diving, no bombing, no petting of the heavy or light persuasion'

'what's petting' asked Mitchell 'would you like to show us, love? Give us a kiss' he said

'do you want a face of congenital herpes?' asked Joy. Mitchell's face went serious. 'thought not, squirt'

'And finally, no running. We had a lad who used to run around, ending up cracking his head. He can run anymore. Eats through a tube, shits in a bag.' she warned

'I think what Joy is trying to say is that the water can make this surface very slippery' said Alfie

'wasn't water. He tripped on a crush' said Joy, gesturing to her crutch. I heard someone gulp.

Then she went on about her spastic colon. Then she left to go and shit.

Then Alfie turned to us and said 'Ok, that was joy, charming little thing'

Pickwell was training her class. They marched around the pool. Frank would be doing the gala but he got out of it.

'right, resuscitation' read Alfie

Mitchell was shagging the weird dummy.

'Oi, sir, Shag a life' said Mitchell

'Mitchell, put that down' said Alfie, fed up. He went to take it off of him but he went letting him go.

Then Joy came back and saw what was happening. 'Thomas! Get off my husband!" she said trying to go as fast as possible on her crutch.

Once Mitchell stopped shagging the dummy and Joy calmed down, we continued the lesson. Joy went to the bathroom again and Alfie put on his goggles because he's allergic to chlorine.

'why are you wearing goggles?' asked Mitchell

'Because I have a severe chlorine allergy' said Alfie

'wait, so you've got webbed feet but you can't actually swim?' asked Jing

'I know Jing, It's so dumb' I said

'right, I'm going to throw this plastic brick into the pool and then each of you is going to dive in get it' Alfie instructed

'what is this preparing us for?' asked Jing, no convinced

'You know, Jing, learning is a lot easier if you don't ask any questions' said Alfie 'Ok who's first? Joe you wanna get it out of the way?'

Joe shook his head.

'I will' said Stephen

'Alright, Stephen you're up'

Stephen was getting ready to jump in and Alfie was getting ready to throw the brick when I jumped in.

'Oi, Oi' I shouted as I jumped in. Stephen screamed.

'REBECCA!' Alfie shouted at me. 'I need to throw the brick in first. Get out'

'Throw it. It won't hit me. You're shit at throwing' I said.

'ok' he said. He thew it in and it hit me on the head and I was knocked out.

I woke up coughing on water. I saw that Frank had given me CPR because no one wanted to give me the kiss of life in fear of Frank beating them up. I was so dizzy. Frank took me to the nurses office.

On Monday, it was the swimming gala. I sat with Frank and his friends.

Fraser lit the torch and basically set some sticks on fire and couldn't control it.

An hour later, we went through every single event and pickwell had won all of them. I just wanted a beer at nandos. I know Frank and I have beers at Nando's all the time but I wanted Alfie to pay for it this time. We got to the synchronized diving. Stephen and Joe were going to do it.

Pickwell did her dive and got 0 points

Frank and one of his friends lent over and shouted 'Oi, Chicken Dipper' and did the moob bop. I laughed because Alfies face was priceless.

Then Stephen was tripped up by Joy and Alfie had to step in.

They did a bomb into the water and got 7 points overall. Alfie had one the money!

Pickwell look annoyed as fuck.

'My chlorine allergy is gone!' said Alfie, happily 'I feel fine!"

After he got out of the pool, his whole face was swollen.

'you better get in a hot shower and some dry clothes, sir' suggested Jing

He got up and went into the boys changing room. We were all in the lobby waiting to go to nandos with Frank and the rest.

'I'll be right back' said Frank to me. He signalled to his friends and went into the boys changing room. Moments later, Alfie was standing naked in the lobby.

'take a photo, it'll last longer' said Alfie

Everyone got out their phones. I knew Frank did it but it was funny.

Then Frank came out the door to give Alfie a float to cover his dick. He went down the corridor covering as much of his area as possible.

Frank came out and said 'funny, right?'

'yeah' I giggled

Once Alfie got changed, we went to Nandos. He still looked terrible but we went with it.

We all got beers and that was that.

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