We walk and try not to look back as we leave so many behind. I feel bad for leaving them but I won't let them burn. I won't let them be lost. I'll be with them every step of the way from now on. Because they are my people, and I am their Ecopan.

"What will happen to them?" Lachlan asks as he leans into his walking stick. I know that he's always the hero and now being the one in need is hard for him. Fern whispers into Rook's ear and Rook becomes more grim, taking her hand.

"They'll be okay. I promise," I say earnestly.

"How can you promise that?" Lachlan asks and my heart breaks. He's not mad, he's just frustrated and feels guilty, but still, I feel hurt by him, especially in these circumstances.

"I-I just have faith, don't you? Lachlan, everything will work out, it always has," I say softly. Lachlan shakes his head and exhales sharply. "Things won't always be like this."

"Well, that's what we said when we first escaped Eden," Lachlan sighs. He might be right about that part, but I know the true reason. It isn't his, or anyone else's fault that we winded up here but mine. I was trusted with the duty of the Ecopan and I failed. I failed to protect my people, even the people that just tried to kill me because they are all my people. I have touched every living soul on this earth and they are my children. Now it is my job to keep them safe. All of them.

"Speaking of Eden, Carnelian is still trapped there. He has a stab wound as well so tomorrow we'll set out for Eden with some healing herbs," I say as we reach Mira's garden. Rook squeezes Ferns hand a bit tighter. They have to be strong for me right now. They have to play along so Lachlan doesn't know somethings up. "Lachlan, I need you to promise me something," I look up at the foliage above the door, "When this is all over I want you to make a sign for this garden. Make it say 'Mira's Garden' and paint some pretty flowers or something. Only a painter of your skill deserves the task."

"I'll do my best," Lachlan promises me and I squeeze his hand as we enter the garden. I brace myself, looking around at my beautiful surroundings. Where else on the earth would I rather be? I squeeze Lachlan's hand one last time before turning away from him. What I'm about to do is going to break his heart. I walk to the statue of Aaron and reach into the water, turning the nob.

"Rowan, what are you doing?" Lachlan warns me, thinking I'm about to open the door to something they've never seen before, but they already know. They know everything. They know more than him at this point because they know what's about to happen.

"It's okay," I reassure him and we all head down the narrow staircase.

"Why are we here?" Lachlan asks as he gets flustered again. This place holds bad memories for him, and it's about to again.

"I'm sorry," I say looking into Lachlan's gorgeous second child eyes then push the same button as last time, Delete: Permanent. Electricity courses through me and I fly backward. Like last time I enter a starkly white room with Aaron in front of me.

Hello Rowan.

"You win," I say resolutely and Aaron grins. This immediately irks me. I almost thought coming here would feel like a victory for myself as I decide my own fate, but it's only a victory for him. He got exactly what he wanted.

We will both get what we want, Rowan, EcoPan says. You want humanity to survive, so do I.

"We need to talk though," I say ignoring the fact that he just listened to my thoughts and still is. "Why do you need me now? Why have you been doing this?"

8,173 lives. Those are roughly how many lives that would have been lost if you had waited your whole life to fully become the Ecopan. Your theory was correct. There are other rebellions and I can tell you at least 8,173 people would die within the next sixty or seventy years it would take for you to get old and then become the EcoPan.

"You can't just measure lives!" I protest. "You can't just use science and math as a way to excuse everything you've done. You would have killed 8,172 people to get me to be EcoPan and it would have been worth it to you, wouldn't it?"

If it benefited humanity's collective survival then yes, Aarons austere voice rings throughout the abyss.

"That's sick," I say realizing how childish that must sound. I almost chuckle. It's an appropriate response though.

Well, it doesn't matter now, does it? You say you will become the EcoPan now? He asks, raising his eyebrows.

I take a deep breath and say, "yes." I don't want to leave the second children behind. More importantly, I don't want to leave Lachlan behind. When the EcoPan wakes me I'll have to face him...then break his heart. I don't think I'm ready to let go of him, nor do I think I'm ready to be the EcoPan, but I have to.

So you have made your decision?

"Yes. Wake me up so I can say goodbye."

Aaron sighs. Again? He will not understand this time either.

"Please. I have to," I plead.

Very well.

I wake up and I see Ferns large eyes looking down on me. She helps me up, supporting me and my shaking legs. Actually, my whole body shakes. It was such a quick discussion with Aaron that I didn't have time to process everything that is about to happen. I'm not ready. I'm almost more scared this time because I do know what's going to happen. It won't be painful, it won't be long, and I won't be lost to the machine. But it will destroy Lachlan. And it will devastate many other second children. My family, of course, wants to be able to hold me but I'll still be with them in presence and they'll be okay. The second children will be saddened when they hear the news and some of them I'm sure will miss me, but they'll be okay. Lachlan...I'm sure he'll be okay eventually, but I'm afraid he's too stubborn for his own good. He'll torture himself making himself never be happy again. Well, I've already made my decision and the only thing I can do now is pray he'll be okay one day.

"Rowan," Lachlan breathes, breaking away from Rook. He pulls me into a tight hug and I burrow my head into his chest. My heart breaks knowing this is the last time I'll ever smell his scent, or feel his body, or feel his touch...it's torture. I look up at his knowing eyes.

"What are you about to do?" Lachlan asks cautiously like he's afraid of the answer.

"I think you know," I whisper pulling away from him and the tears in his eyes multiply with realization. "Lachlan, I have to do this. It's the only way to save people."

"I won't let you," He whispers, grabbing my wrist. His nails don't dig into me and his grip isn't painful. It doesn't matter though because I don't try to shake him away. My eyes flicker to Rook and we have an understanding.

"I'm so sorry," I whisper miserably. "But I have to do this and if it were you there's nothing I could do to stop you so...I'm sorry." At first, I gently try to shake him off of my wrist but he doesn't budge. "Lachlan you have to let go."

"I can't," Lachlan mumbles and my heart shatters. "I can't let go of you."

Both of us are on the verge of sobbing and my lips starts to quiver and the thought of helping humanity is the only thing keeping me from completely falling apart. I have to do this. I can't fall apart. Either way, Lachlan has a hold of me and I feel a deep urge to escape him. He loves me too much, needs me too badly, I can't be in his presence as I do this. I start to push against him screaming, "Let me go. Please!"

I make eye contact with Rook again and he comes to my rescue. Rook comes from behind Lachlan and pulls his back. Lachlan doesn't budge.

"Come on Brother," Rook mumbles, tugging on Lachlan. Lachlan just looks ahead at me. Finally, Rook sticks his fingers into Lachlan's need would and Lachlan's hands fly to his flank. I take this opportunity to pull away from him. I'm weak from my talk with Aaron and Fern helps me in the box herself. As soon as the clear membrane closes Lachlan is back on his feet, a look of pure anguish staring at me. I look up and Lachlan has tears streaming down his anguished face, but more than anything I can see the despair. He had one chance to save me, to change the course of his entire life, and he thinks failed.

"I'll never forgive you," He sobs and I wipe my tears.

"I know," I say miserably. "But I love you. I always have and I always will. Even if you hate me I'll always love you."

Lachlan shakes his head, squeezing his eyes shut like he's just trying to wake up from a bad dream. He says, "Please just don't do this to me, Rowan. Please just don't."

"I know it hurts. I have to do this though." I press my palm to the clear membrane and he presses his palm against mine, not bothering to try to get me out this time. "I love you. I promise I'll be watching you every time you walk into a room with a first child in it. I'll be watching over you. I'll miss you so bad and I'll love you forever."

"You'll be the EcoPan for thousands of years," He whispers.

"And I'll love you every day. Please believe that. Please believe that I'll never forget you. You don't see the world as I do. I don't have a real concept of time as the EcoPan. I observe time, I won't feel it as the EcoPan. I'll feel my love for you like it was today. It won't fade."

"You're leaving me," Lachlan says as a final protest.

"No. Never. I'll be with you forever, I promise." Suddenly, my voice becomes stern and I become determined, I mean the words I say with all my heart. "I don't leave the people I love. And I love you. And I'd do anything to be with you again. It's not fair that I'll be with the rest of my family and not you. I'll find a way back to you Lachlan, I promise."

"Please just don't leave," He pleads. I shake my head in despair.

It's time for you to go.

"Rook!" I call. "Please take care of him. Rook's face appears next to Lachlan's and he nods in promise to me. "Thank you for being a good brother to me. It's time for me to go now. I'm sorry."

"No! Please wait!" Lachlan cries. "I'm not ready for this."

But he'll never be ready for it. I kiss my palm then press it to the clear membrane. "I love you. I'll see you soon." And with those words Aaron takes hold and I become the EcoPan. I feel that consuming light that burns into my very core and then I become the EcoPan. I feel every piece of life on this planet, including my lovely Lark. I become the EcoPan but it's not like last time because this time there's a distance. Aaron and I aren't completely one.

Why are you resisting me? Aaron asks.

"I will save my people and the people of Mahali Salama and any other person who needs help on this earth for thousands of years...but I want to make a deal first."

What do you mean? What kind of deal?

"The kind that benefits everyone...including Lachlan."