I went to sleep after getting my ring back, still ignoring him. I hated being mad at him but he deserved it at this point and I deserved better. Sometimes I catch myself thinking about what would have happened if instead of kissing him at that stupid party I would have just gone on a date with Jeremy? Wouldn't all that have been so much easier. He probably would have said no anyway. I'm pretty sure he has a girlfriend, doesn't he? It was now the next morning and I was still asleep when I felt someone kiss my forehead. I slowly opened my eyes to see no one there, so I turned around and saw Ryder going to his window through mine.

Didn't he say his window was locked? I guess that was a lie too then? He could have just called his mom in the morning or gone and unlocked before coming back to my house last night, right? Whatever. I lied in bed with my eyes closed for a few more minutes before getting up and dragging myself out of bed and to the bathroom. I turned the shower on and stripped and jumped straight into it. After brushing my teeth of course. Once I finished taking a shower, I wrapped a towel around my body and then towel dried my hair, leaving it damp. I walked out of my bathroom to go and grab my clothes, almost letting out a scream as I stepped into my room and saw Ryder sitting on my bed.

Before I could scream, Ryder jumped to his feet, and clamped his hand over my mouth. I stopped trying to scream and ripped his hand off of me. "What the hell are you doing here?" I asked, now a little more calm and breathing steady again. "You're coming with me today. The whole day." he ordered. "Um, no I'm not. You can't just tell me to do something after we had a fight and then expect me to listen. Plus, I'm busy today." I huffed as I walked to my closet and grabbed some clothes. "Where are you going?" he walked over to my closet and closed the drawer that I was rummaging through to grab some socks.

"I have to go to the school. I'm helping arrange the ceremony for the new students this year." I explained. Yeah, our school was extra like that and did a ceremony for all the new students joining the high school. "There's plenty of people who are helping with that. You don't need to be there." he argued. Something's wrong. He's not in a good mood today. He seems a little too aggressive for himself. "Yes I do. I signed up and the school is expecting me to be there. I have to do the introduction of the new students on the day of the ceremony as well, we have rehearsals." I argued.

"I know you're introducing them because so am I. I'm the person you're supposed to be doing that with. Can you please just come with me?" he asked, getting more and more agitated by the second. "Where the hell do you want to take me? What is so important?" I asked as I went into my bathroom and shut the door so I could get dressed while he continued talking from the other side of the door. "I need to tell you something, Mia. I'm serious." he stated as I threw the towel for laundry in the laundry bag and opened the door, stepping out. "You can't tell me here? You need the whole day?" I asked annoyed.

"Yes. I need the whole day with you. Because first I'm going to take you out. Mia, what I need to tell you, might make you hate me. So I'm trying to make sure that I'm not different in your eyes after you know the truth." he sighed. What the hell was he talking about? I stayed silent for a little bit. Contemplating whether I should go with him or not. And in the end, I sighed in defeat. "Fine. Let's go."

x-X-x

The whole day, we walked around town, went to watch a movie, went to the cafe, went around town for a drive, and we were now in the park, star gazing. Was I still mad at him? No. Did he know that? Yes. "Mia. I think it's time I told you what I was supposed to." he muttered under his breath, loud enough for me to hear. "Whenever you're ready." I offered him a small smile.

"Mia, I know that I never gave you a reason for leaving you when we broke up and you know it too. So I'm telling you now because if we get back together- and god I pray we do, you should know what you're getting yourself into." he sighed nervously. I've never seen him this nervous.

"Ryder, what are you talking about?" I asked getting more and more nervous by the minute. I was scared of what he was going to say. What if it really did make me hate him? I don't want to hate him! "I-I am a gang member." he said in just above a whisper. What? What the hell is he talking about? What does that even mean? "Well what does that mean?" I asked hesitantly.

"It means that, I-I am part of a gang which, runs i-illegally. And the reason I left you, was because, they found out who you were and th-they threatened to k-kill you." he explained with his eyes glossing under the moonlight and the stars.

"What do you do? I-in that gang?" I asked as I stuttered.

"Well, I deal for them." he stated calmly.

"What do you mean you deal for them? Deal what? D-drugs?" I asked in shock and confusion.

He simply nodded his head as he looked down at the mat that we were lying on not too long ago. Does that mean he takes drugs too? "I don't take any. If that's what you're thinking. I just give them to the people who ask and hand over the money." he sighed.

"Did you join the gang voluntarily?" I asked with fear running through my veins.

"No, of course not. My dad fucked me and my mom up really bad before he left. They broke into my house, held a gun to my mom's head and said that they'd kill her if I didn't join the gang." he explained quietly. I then asked the one question that was killing me on the inside, "Ryder, have you ever killed someone?" I questioned nervously. He took a long pause before answering, and then he said, "Yeah, I have." he admitted.

"Was it self defense?" I asked, hoping it was. He wasn't a killer. He couldn't be.

"Yes, it was. If I wouldn't have shot that guy, he would have shot you and me." he mumbled.

"He would have shot me?" I asked stunned and confused.

"It was the night before I broke up with you. We went ice skating that night, do you remember? Do you remember I told you to go and wait at the rink? I took the guy in a different neighborhood when I saw him holding a gun and aiming it at you and then I shot him before he could pull the trigger on me. Ethan and Daniel helped me clean up and get rid of his body since they're part of the gang too and then we pretended like it never happened." he slowly and deeply breathed.

"D-do Harper and Grace know?" I questioned.

"Yes, they do. Ethan and Daniel told them when they joined. That's why they grew distant in between." he shakily sighed.

"Does this change things between us?" he questioned. I didn't know. Did it?

"I-I don't know but I-I do need s-some time." I paused.

"I need you to stay away from me, Ryder. Just for a day or two. Until I can process it all."

"I'll get back to you in 48 hours then." he forced a smile.