《don't you mind? | KARL JACOBS》17 HEU
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❝ ❞
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stream highlights: clipped this part just bc
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: "what qualities do you look for in a partner?
btw i missed you so much! hope you're doing well!"
: "aw thank you! hope you're doing well too!
and um... qualities? i dunno, someone sweet maybe,
dorky and nice. overall a fun person. has cool fashion sense—"
: "so... karl jacobs?"
: "WHAT?!"
: "NO NO NO, CHARLIE TOLD ME TO SAY IT
CHARLIE TOLD ME TO SAY IT."
: "I DID NOT, BITCH."
: "charlie, stop bullying the child."
: "WHAT did you just call ME?"
: "a bitch."
: "a child?"
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stream highlights: LMAO
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: "matty?"
: "yes, tommy?"
: "how many boyfriends have you had?"
: "or girlfriends!"
: "yes yes. or girlfriends?"
: "one. and oh my god, he was an asshole.
would not recommend. and i haven't had a girlfriend.
platonically married to minx right now though.
shout out to my bae, i'm coming home soon xoxo."
: mutters quietly in the background
"god, you are embarrassing. minx marry me instead."
: "HEY! GET YOUR OWN FIANCÉE."
: "nah, it's my home-wrecker arc."
...silence...
: "do i have to fight?"
: "no no it's alright! if he does try anything with me
i will call you both immediately."
: "fuck yeah. just tell us.
me and tubbo are gonna be stabbing that bitch."
: "i will be stabbing from afar though
because travel ban exists—"
: "HEY HEY NO STABBING...
if you guys go stabbing people at least fucking invite me."
: mutters quietly, again "it's their murderer arc."
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stream highlights: FUN SIZED SKSJJAH
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: "i feel like we need a name. we need a name."
: "a name?"
: "yes! because tubbo and tommy are the clingy duo.
and tommy's a part of sleepy bitches inc—"
: "PFFT HA. SLEEPY BITCHES INC?! ITS SLEEPY BOIS INC."
: "OH... ok? bitches is better.
whoever made your group name sucks ass."
: "charlie, that's fan behaviour.
why do you know everything about their smp."
: "true, char. you're such a stan."
: "and your point is what exactly?"
: "i think it's nice that charlie knows stuff about the smp!"
: "bless you, tubbo. now i know why you're everyone's favorite.
i'm adopting you, i'm sending over the papers."
: "hey no! i'm adopting him first."
: "fuck off you fucking bully.
you don't deserve to adopt him!"
: "and you do?"
: "duh bitch. of course i do."
: "i won't let any of you adopt tubbo.
not on my watch."
: "bruh, even me?."
: "you can't adopt tubbo, you're our big sister."
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: "TOMMY. I WILL CRY DURING THIS STREAM.
DON'T TEST ME."
: "... big sis."
: "that's it, my tears are about to flow."
: "matty, shut the fuck UP. WHAT'S OUR GROUP NAME."
: "i would say our old group name but no."
: "what's your old group name?"
: "don't ask, son. don't ask."
: "now i'm curious.
: "how about fun-sized family?"
: "i don't know,
only tubbo and matty are the smallest in this group."
: "PFFT BAHAHAHA"
: "SO TRUE."
: "FUCK YALL. ME AND TUBBO ARE TALL."
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stream highlights: LMAOOOOO IM DECEASED
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: "i will never say the p-word."
: "pee pee?"
: "poo?"
: "no. i mean the p-word you guys keep on saying. dumbasses."
: "wait what p-word?"
: "yeah what p-word, matty?"
: "i don't wanna say it."
: "is it penis?"
: panics "NO IDIOT. I MEANT POGGERS—
motherFUCKER NOW YOU MADE ME SAY IT."
: imitating techno "pOoOoOOOg."
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Matty's stream had just finished and her eyes felt tired from staring at the screen for too long. She glanced at her wall clock, 6:30 pm. She rubbed her eyes and let out a yawn, stretching her arms as she did. "Alright, i'm gonna head off now. I might go nap a bit. Also Tommy and Tubbs, try not to stay up too late, alright?" She said towards the younger ones that were hanging out in the voice call with them. Over the past few days that Matty's been talking with them she's grown fond of the two boys and the sisterly instinct had instantly kicked in.
"I will! Don't worry about us too much, take care of yourself!" Tubbo replied.
Matty would've cried if she wasn't so tired. Tubbo was like a little brother to her, something she never had since she was the only kid. Same goes with Tommy. Although he seemed the most obnoxious out of the bunch during livestreams, he was very sweet off-cam. You could say he was a bit clingy when it comes to Matty and Tubbo. That new piece of information was shocking to most people since Tommy had stated once that Tubbo was the only person that makes him emotional and now Matty was added to that list.
"Aw, thanks Tubbs. I'm just looking out for the both of you!"
"It's her older sister arc." Charlie stated, making the whole call go into another fit of laughter. The whole stream he kept using the word "arc" for almost everything. It became the inside joke for the group.
"Alright, alright. I can't make any promises though—"
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"Tommy."
"I'm kiddin', I'm kidding! Well, goodnight boys, I will see you tomorrow." Tommy exclaimed, leaving the call as Charlie and Orson said their goodbyes.'"Bye bye!" Tubbo said afterwards, also leaving the call.
There was a comfortable silence between the trio, all smiling at the newly added people to their group. They were pretty closed-off with other people and never let anyone in that easily but somehow, for some fucking unknown reason, Tubbo and Tommy were able to slither their way into the group and the older welcomed both with open arms.
"How much do you guys wanna bet he's not going to sleep?" Charlie stated, a yawn following afterwards. "And I say he, because we all know Tubbo will go to bed when he's told to."
"Nah, I don't think Tubbo will be sleeping." Matty chuckled.
"I bet 2 dollars that Tommy will be a sleep right now." Orson said while Charlie scoffed, "Ro, you're rich and you're only betting five? Raise it up." He complained.
"I'm not giving you that much money."
"Whore."
JUST TWEETED!
Matty, Charlie and Orson's phones collectively went off as a notification that Tommy tweeted went through. Tubbo's tweet following afterwards.
"See? SEE. Hand over the cash." Charlie yelled to his headset's mic. Matty winced at the sudden volume and yelled back at him.
●○●○
• tommyinnit
Fun-sized family. We are fun. we are all tall though except for Matty and Tubbo.
• notabridge
tommy how dare u post thisajsha. i look so bad here ://
replied: Not my problem
replied: you. bitch.
• imnotorson
FAM BAM. we're better than sbi 😳👏
replied: im joking btw guys
dont kill me plz a ha ha :*
replied: are You better
than the blade?
replied: idk who that is
replied: WHAT
• TubboLive
FUN-SIZED FAMILY WOOOO
eplied: WOOO
replied: WOO
replied: WOO WOOOOO
replied: WooO
• mattybwrapz
clingy bitch
replied: Big Sis
replied: TOMMY
I WILL CRY ISTG GO TO BED
replied: big sis :D
replied: TUBBO NOT YOU TOO 🤕💔
replied: yes
SENT YOU A MESSAGE ON TWITTER!
heu :)
*hey
●○●○
6:55 pm
➢ oreo , mat not healy , c-money, speepee
( orson , mat , charlie, spifey )
GUYSADSK
didnt u say u were gonna sleep 🙄🙄
WHOS AWAKE
HELP
HELP
IM YELL
BITCH.
i just answered u
smh
sorry sorry
IT SENT LATE U KNOW MY WIFIF SUCKS ASS
BRUH UR NOTIFS SCARED ME I THOUGHT SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED ://
IT IS BAD
where's spifey
oh wait i forgot timezones existed
anyways
HE JSUGSG MEJAJSD ME
IM
HUH?
girl its too early for gibberish
WAIT, U MEAN KARL!?
YES
OH MY GOD
WHAT DID HE SAY
HE SAID "HEU"
wait now he said "hey"
IT WAS A TYPO BUT
girl, r u sure u arent simping or??
i do Not simp
now help me
what do i say
i dont know
say hello?
SHUT UP I,M PANICKND
GIRL TAKE DEEP BRETAHS.
ITS ALRIGHT
try to calm down
breathe in or cross ur arms and tap both your shoulders
mat, calm down.
he seems like a nice person!! talk to him like how you talk with us!!
I CANT CALL HIM A BITCH IN OUR FIRST INTERACTION
THAT WASNT WHAT I MEANT
I MEAN TALK TO HIM LIKE HOW U NORMALLY TALK WITH US
LIKE IN A "CALM", "NICE" MANNER
AKSGASHGS
I—
i came here to ask for advice but im getting attacked
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"Ah!" Karl yelled as he pressed send. The word heu burning his eyes, mocking him, as he continuedly scanned the word over and over again. His whole body felt hot and his hands began to sweat. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." He muttered while quickly typing out another message, this time correcting the misspelled greeting. Why the hell does Twitter not have an unsend option?, he thought. He never hated an app more.
"What? What happened?"
Karl jumped, forgetting he was on teamspeak with his friends. "A mistake."
"What do you mean?" George asked, his concern was heard through the call.
They were currently on the server, trying to fix anything that got blown up during the time they were gone. So far not much were ruined by any creepers, just a couple stairs missing but it wasn't anything a little click can't fix.
"I said heu instead of hey." Karl said, giggling nervously afterwards to mask the embarrassment he felt. So far... it wasn't working. He still wanted to crawl into a hole and not come out from it. "This is what happens when I try to be bold."
"Hey man! It's alright! We all make typos, it's normal. I'm sure she wouldn't point it out." Quackity assured him. Well tried to. Karl was still panicking on the inside but he was thankful for the affirmations his friends were giving him right now.
"So... did she reply?"
"Wait, wait. I'm checking."
Karl pursed his lips as he stared at his screen. Nothing.
"There's nothing."
"Yet." Quackity assured, yet again. George nodded, "Yeah, she must be napping or something."
Karl hummed, acknowledging what they said "Yeah, yet." He muttered to himself.
Well, at least he had something to look forward to tomorrow.
ok so ive gotten a really bad flu, so if updates dont come quick im very very sorry but i gotta take care of my health first !! i hope y'all understand
also opinions on the book so far? i would truly appreciate the feedback pls i beg 😭🙏🏼
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