《Theory [TOM HOLLAND]》THIRTY ONE
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gnomecoming
the only picture i got yesterday but look how cute we are
aw i had such a great time guys!
wow i look like a deep fried toenail wrapped in denim
beep beep lie detected
u look great
but why do i look like i'm 2.63 feet tall
because you are
shut up you bowl of nine week old clam chowder
it's just because your jacket is the size of tom's ego
hey that's my jacket don't insult it
wait also hey that's me don't insult me
harrison i deem you adequate
holy shit was that a compliment
wait
wow mel practically just agreed to lay down her life for haz
you too seem to be of average standards
aww i'm blushing
cool your jets tom
yeah i'm just making a new pal
i don't want you two being friends the roasts will never end
that's like putting a wolverine and a honey badger together in a cage
i roast you out of love
i don't
hey leave tom alone he's very delicate
am not
i got a paper cut scrapbooking yesterday and i only cried for like twenty minutes
oh tom
don't worry bud i'll give you the eternal love and nurturing you deserve💞💖💘
eternal love doesn't exist but okay
oh hello bitter party of one
soon to be without functioning legs party of one
if you're going to keep spending time with tom i think i'm going to need to get insurance
and she will be because mom will last forever
the only thing that lasts forever is herpes
that's cute
makes me all weak in the knees
could be a symptom of of a metabolic disease
aw you care about my health
yeah if you die of natural causes i don't get the privilege of killing you
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i'll put that in the wedding vows
what they really mean when they say mel is slaying
i live for this shit
can you two stop flirting and just ride the baloney pony already
if that's a euphemism i will never come within a twenty mild radius of you again
i want you out of the country by 5 pm haz
oh you're moving in on my man mel huh??
i'll fight you for him behind the walmart dumpster at 0700 hours
0700 hours doesn't exist
and neither does any sort of affection between me and tom
you know i'm allowed to bring a guest to the set of infinity war
i was going to see if mel wanted to go but since she's being an overcooked rice ball i guess i'll have to take some other girl
NOT ALLOWED
i don't even like marvel
SACRILEGE
what kind of person have you brought us tom
there's a snack bar on set
i love marvel so much omg thor rag and sock was so good
why don't you take tony he's been trying to convince you to take him for ages
where is tony
did we forget to put him in the chat
oh no this is bad tony didn't talk to me for 3 weeks after i stepped on his toe
toeny
daya removed from gnomecoming
daya addedto gnomecoming
oh hello FUCKERS
so good of you all to deign yourselves to add me to the chat
uh oh he's bitter
abort abort abort
nice to meet you mel
nice to meet you too i've heard great things
NOW THE REST OF YOU GET READY TO TASTE PAIN
a chapter without a single mention of sajan singh i am Shocked (why do i get so attached to my minor characters this is how theory happened) (spinoff of a spinoff anyone)
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