pic of Jess------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->

We made small talk over dinner and now it was an awkward silence. I played with the leftover food on my plate not knowing how to ask what's been on both our minds the whole night, why did he kiss me?

“So um how did you know where I was?” I asked.

“Well um I asked Jess if you ever came home yet and when he said you haven’t and he saw Jake leave I got worried. So I kind have just drove around the mall waiting for you to walk out,” he said shyly then blushes.

“Oh well that’s sweet,” I smile at him which only makes him blush more. He bows his head down so I couldn’t look at his face while he mumbles a “Welcome,”

“So then what happened in the car?” I asked slowly.

He didn’t look up just murmured, “I kissed you, obviously.”

“Well no duh Sherlock,” I rolled my eyes, “But why?”

“I-I was c-curious,”

“About being g…”

“Don’t say the ‘G’ word,” he looked up at me and I saw the guilt in his eyes, “Please?” he apologizes seeing the sadness in my eyes.

“Ok… but are you confused?” I whispered trying to not to scare him.

“I- I don’t know. I look at how happy you are with yourself and I want to be that. I wish people would just accept me for me. Not for being captain of the basketball team or one of the most popular guys at school but for being Zain.” He looked up at me with confusion written all over his face. I smiled at him reassuringly.

“I-If you want, I-I can h-help?”

“H-How?” he stared into my eyes and I can see the pain that’s causing him.

“We can start off with how you felt about the kiss?” I suggested.

“It was… I liked… I wasn’t grossed out by it like I thought I would be,”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Myself, by if it would make me happy,”

“Did it?” he looked up at me with a shy smile and nodded. Then he blushed. “Why weren’t you grossed out?”

“Because I wasn’t thinking it as if I was kissing another guy but that I was kissing Nick. The cute, outgoing, friendly, crazy person that I grew up with.”

I thought back to the days before high school when Zain and I were best friends. Jess would talk to us once in a while but he mostly hung out with girls. But when I came out to Zain in freshman year he totally flipped out! He didn’t go to school for a month! No one heard from him or his family the whole time. Then one day he just came back to school and with all the outrages rumors going around everyone was to afraid to ask why he was gone ever since, him and Jess have been best friends and homophobes.

“What happened that month you missed school? The month after I told you I was gay?” he flinched at the end and avoided my eyes.

“The real reason?” I nodded. “Well that night when we were at your house hanging out and out of nowhere you just yelled you were um… I didn’t know what to think. It was a huge surprise that it shocked me. I needed to think to be by myself and get used to the idea. I ran out of your house decided to walk home, well after you chased me around your neighborhood. I got to a very dark corner street, I waited for the car to pass before I crossed the street but it stopped.” He flinched.

“W-what happened?” I whispered afraid of the answer.

“The man inside pulled me in the van with him and raped me.” a tear slid down his cheek and I reached out and wiped it away. Zain grabbed my hand holding in on his cheek, “the doctors thought it was best if I avoided you for a while since you were… but I couldn’t. I knew if I went to school I would see you there and you wouldn’t leave me alone. That month I went to counseling and they told me how terrible boy on boy action was. My parents would tell me to stay away from people like that, that it wasn’t normal. That when I got back to school Jess confronted me. Asked what happened between you to. At first I told him to leave me alone but when I saw you that day memories came back and I took out my anger on you. I am sorry.” He looked down embarrassed.

Another tear slid down his cheek and I wiped it away with a soft kiss, “I forgive you.”

“That it? All those years of bulling you and you forgive me by three words?”

“Yes, the past is the past I can’t change it and neither can you,” I shrugged my shoulders liked I didn’t care but I did. Poor Zain he didn’t hate gays, he was forced to hate them! Zain took my hands and held them in his.

“Nick?” he whispered like he was on the edge of tears.

“Yes?”

“Kiss me?” without answering him I leaned across the table and softly pecked him on his soft lips. I pulled back to look at his reaction, he looked confused.

“It’s ok Zain. One step at a time,”

“But how do I know if I am…”

“I can help you if you want?” I blushed at thinking of Zain and me getting it on. He just nodded.

Zain paid for dinner ignoring my protest that I can pay for myself. We went back to the car Zain driving me back home. We pulled into my drive way and no one was home still, “So um can I come in?” Zain asked then blushed.

“Of course let’s go!” I dragged him from the driver’s seat over the middle onto my seat and out the passenger’s door. Then walked around the car to get to the front door. I frowned I should’ve just crawled over the driver seat to get out its closer! Oh well! I dragged Zain with me then plumped my cute little butt on my couch and patted for Zain to sit next to me. He didn’t sit right next to me or at the whole other end of the couch he sat in the middle.

I looked over at him, he looked so awkward! Remembering him wanting to know if he was really gay I thought of my evil plan. I looked over at him again thinking of myself as a lion and him a little bunny. My eyes closed slightly while I watched my pray and before I knew it I pounced on him!

“Rawr!!” I jumped on him straddling him biting his neck.

“What the hell are you doing?!” he shouted at me but made no movement to try to get me off of him. I slowly bit up his neck to his jaw line then extra slowly to his mouth biting his lower lip. I peaked up at him and raised an eyebrow to see if he wants me to continue or stop when he didn’t make any movement; he didn’t even blink I took that as a go on.

I stopped biting him and placed a light kiss on his lips and he instantly deepened it. I crawled my arms up his chest to his shoulders then locked my hands together behind his neck intertwine my fingers in his hair. He hands were digging into my hips yanking me against him until not even air was between our bodies.

I felt his tongue pushing against my lips wanting entrance into my mouth and I gladly gave it to him. I tugged at his shirt breaking our kiss for only a second while he pulled it off. I ran my hands over his smooth hairless chest rubbing his 8 pack. I trailed kisses all the way down his chest right to his pants line noticing the budge in his jeans. Smiling I placed a soft kiss on the tip and then rolled off of Zain and the couch onto the floor. I grabbed the TV remote and turned the TV on to random channel.

Thirsty I got up and started walking to the kitchen, “You thirsty?” I yelled over my shoulder and saw him shake his head no before I rounded the corner running right into Jess.

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