I roll over to find the other side of the bed cold. The rush of panic hits me as I desperately search for Bellamy's warmth. It doesn't help that I just woke up from the nightmare of watching him die for the thousandth time. "Bell?! Bellamy!" My eyes start to burn as I feel the tears starting to form in my eyes.

The light in the corner of the room gets brighter causing me to let out a relieved sigh. He's okay. I move to sit at the edge of the bed staring at Bellamy sitting in the corner. His face is calm but worried as he stares back. I haven't woken up like this in months, I guess we both thought my nightmares were over.

"I'm sorry I didn't come back to bed. She woke up a bit ago. She's asleep now though." He moves over to me taking our now sleeping daughter with him. "Thought maybe she could sleep between us... you know just in case she wakes up again." I reach out for her as Bellamy hands her to me. "She looks so much like you, I can't help but stare at her," he says moving a strand of my hair behind my ear. "I thought you were gone. I kept seeing it. I kept seeing you die and..."

"Shh Shh. It's okay. I'm okay." He places a kiss on my forehead then wipes away the tears from my cheek. "Thought we were done with the nightmares."

"Yeah me too." I press Madi to my chest feeling all her body heat. She's oddly the one that calms me down the most. I kinda find it ironic since I was so terrified to have her in the first place.

"Clarke. I'm not going anywhere okay...I promise." He moves back to his side of the bed getting under the covers. "Try to get some sleep" I feel his hand stroke the middle of my back urging me to lie next to him. I place Madi in between both of us watching her small chest move up and down slowly. I pull the blanket over my shoulder then reach for Bellamy's hand under the covers.

Looking back on it I never thought I'd be here with him like this. Those first moments stepping out of that dropship breathing in the air for the first time. Those moments that still stay with me, how long ago it was. How young we were and how my love for you grows even more. I know that I'd relive those moments again just to come back here.

I find comfort in knowing that I don't have to whisper may we meet again as a silent prayer for you to come back to me.