《On Thin Ice》45
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The silence in the car on the way to my house was almost painful. The weight of what my mother and Dave wanted to do to me was causing pressure in my chest. And the fact that they were doing it to Landon too made my stomach sick.
Fox's hands tightly gripped the steering wheel, his jaw set and tense.
"This is so fucked up," I muttered, running my hand through my hair.
"I wish they would just leave you the fuck alone," he snapped, gripping the wheel even tighter. "They've put you through enough."
"It's Dave," I told him, leaning my head on the window. "He puts these thoughts in her head and she just agrees."
Fox let out a heavy breath through his nose.
"He is the devil," he muttered, shaking his head as we pulled up to my house.
I moved to get out of the car, noticing Fox wasn't following me.
"Aren't you coming?" I asked in confusion.
"Your dad hates me," he reminded me, his eyebrows raised.
I rolled my eyes at him, walking around the car and opening his door. I pulled on his arm, causing Fox to unbuckle his seatbelt and allow me to drag him out of the car.
I pulled him close, wrapping my arm around his waist and giving him a slow kiss. My arm tightened around him as I walked him backwards, closing the door and leaning him against the car.
Fox brought his hand to the back of my head, pushing my face closer to his and tangling his fingers in my hair.
We finally pulled apart when a car beeped loudly at us. I jumped away, my heart hammering in my chest at the sound. My face hardened when I realized it had been Josh who had just driven by and pulled into the driveway.
Josh waved with a sarcastic smile as he got out of the car. Fox flipped him off, a deadpanned look on his face, before the two of us walked up to the house behind him.
"Are you guys going to be one of those couples now?" Josh asked he opened the front door, glancing back at us.
"You jealous?" Fox retorted, following him into the house.
Josh sent him a look of disgust.
"Boys?" Mindy called out before Josh could reply.
We followed her voice into the kitchen where Ava and all her friends were sitting around the table eating lunch. The girls whispered and giggled to each other while glancing at the three of us. Ava and Fawn shook their heads at them.
"Are you boys hungry?" Mindy asked as she washed her hands at the sink. "I made lunch."
Fox, Josh, and I sat down at the table with the girls as they continued whispering what I could only assume was about us. Ava's friends eventually got picked up by their parents so that the only one left was Fawn.
"What did you guys do last night?" I asked the two girls, taking a bite out of my sandwich.
"What did you do last night?" Ava retorted, earning a laugh from Fawn.
I shared a look with Fox. "She's always so rude to me."
"That's what little sisters do," Fox replied, glancing over at Fawn.
"I'm so glad you guys weren't here last night," Fawn said to which Ava nodded in agreement.
"See, that's rude," Fox said, pointing at his sister.
"No," Ava started, shaking her head. "Because as soon as you showed up all our friends just started talking about how hot they think you guys are."
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Ava and Fawn shared disgusted looks.
"Well, we are," Fox said as if he was stating the obvious.
"Gross," Fawn complained.
"Kenzie has always had a crush on Josh," Ava added with an eye roll. "That's why I don't usually invite her over."
"That's funny," Fox laughed with a mischievous look on his face. "Fawn used to have a crush on Jo–"
"Fox Lee Ridley!" Fawn screeched, a deadly glare directed at him.
Josh just chuckled, sending a kind smile toward Fawn. The poor girl looked embarrassed, yet murderous. She wanted to kill her brother and I couldn't blame her.
"Don't embarrass your sister," I said, placing my hand on Fox's leg.
"She deserves it," he grumbled.
A moment later, Dad sauntered into the kitchen with a bright smile on his face as he looked at each of us. He made his way over to Mindy and gave her a kiss on the cheek before sitting down at the table with us.
He seemed perkier than usual and that was saying a lot. His hands were clasped together in front of him as his leg bounced under the table. He looked so content and if I told him about Mom and Dave then it would only sour his mood.
"Did you guys have a good night?" Dad asked, his voice upbeat.
Josh looked down at the table, not wanting to meet anyone's gaze. It was evident that his night was not so good.
"It was fun," I replied, looking to Fox for confirmation. "Right?"
Fox hummed in agreement, nodding his head. He sat straighter in his seat, his leg nervously bouncing beneath my hand. It was strange to see Fox this way. He never usually showed his discomfort in situations. My father, of all people, had his usually confident self feeling self conscious.
Dad sensed the tension and immediately placed an apologetic look on his face as he glanced at Fox.
"I wanted to apologize, Fox and Elijah," Dad started in a sincere tone. "For how I reacted yesterday."
Fox seemed to calm down a bit at the words.
"I just worry about Elijah so much," he continued. "But I'm glad you two are together. I can't think of anyone better suited for my son than you, Fox."
My lips quirked upward as I looked between Fox and my father. Fox's pinched expression softened and I felt the tension leave his body. That was all he needed to hear, that my father didn't hate him for dating me.
"Thank you," Fox said, a soft smile blooming on his lips.
"See? He doesn't hate you," I teased, knocking my leg into his.
"You thought I hated you?" Dad asked, astonished with a sad expression.
Fox glared at me, his cheeks tinging pink.
"He was just a little worried about your reaction," Mindy interjected, going to sit by Dad.
"Fox is a little dramatic," Fawn added with a smirk. "He tries to hide it, it doesn't work."
"Fawn," Fox hissed, a scowl directed toward his sister.
I laughed along with Ava and Fawn, placing my hand over Fox's on the table. His gaze softened when he turned to look at me and we shared glowing looks for a moment before I glanced past him to see Josh. He was still looking down, his gaze focused on the table in front of him. He had seemingly missed the entire conversation, zoning out on whatever occupied his mind.
"Is everything alright, Josh?" Dad asked, noticing his son's detachment from the rest of us.
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Josh looked up, surprised to see all eyes on him. He looked around at all of us, biting down on his bottom lip, before his gaze landed on me. He looked as if he was trying to silently communicate with me but I couldn't decipher what his expression meant.
"I just—" Josh started, then sighed before continuing. "I just didn't have a good night."
"Honey, what's wrong?" Mindy wondered with a look of concern.
Josh looked close to admitting what was truly bothering him, but he was still holding back. He was contemplating because this was something he always tried so hard to keep out of his mind, but he knew there was no going back after our parents knew.
Josh let out a shaky breath, moving his gaze from me to Mindy.
"I've just been feeling really guilty lately," he mumbled, looking down at the table. "I treated someone badly for a while."
Fox and I glanced at each other briefly. Josh's guilt was clearly burdening him. He looked tired and pale, the weight of his guilt physically affecting him.
"Why?" Mindy curiously wondered.
Josh took a deep breath and his eyes slowly moved upward to lock on his mother.
"I kissed a guy," Josh admitted, his confession hanging in the silence. "And I treated him badly afterward. Then Elijah found out and I panicked and said awful things to him and now the guilt of it all is eating me alive."
"Josh, I'm not mad at you for that," I immediately assured him, willing him to meet my gaze, but he didn't.
What Josh had said to me hurt, but I had come to realize that the break down between the both of us was necessary to build our relationship and move on. We needed to air out our feelings to be able to fix our tainted relationship.
"Honey," Mindy called out, grabbing Josh's attention. "Let's go talk."
She stood up and Josh followed slowly behind her, the two of them leaving the rest of us in silence.
"Let's go upstairs," I said in a hushed tone in Fox's ear.
He nodded, getting up to follow me.
"Uh," Dad stopped us, holding his hand up and causing the girls to snicker.
"Dad, don't," I groaned, pushing my hair back with my hand.
"Just keep the door open," he said, his voice light yet stern.
I let out another groan and nodded, Fox looking increasingly uncomfortable.
Once we got to my room, I shut the door almost all the way, only leaving it ajar.
"Your Dad's going to come up here and barge in," Fox said as he sat down on my bed, eyebrows raised as his head motioned toward the door.
"No, he won't," I assured him, turning to sit down on his lap.
He moved his hands up to my hips and leaned back slightly as my hand snaked around his shoulders, my hands meeting behind his neck. I tried connecting our lips, but Fox leaned back, his eyes blazing like a heavy thought burdened his mind.
"What's wrong?" I asked, leaning back. "You don't wanna kiss me?"
"Are you going to tell your parents about Susan and Dave?" His voice was argumentative like he already knew the answer to his question.
I sighed, picking myself up off him and moving to his side.
"They don't need anything else to worry about right now," I muttered, looking down at the floor and twiddling my thumbs in my lap. "Micah's Dad was right. They can't take me. And he's going to take care of Landon."
"You should still tell your parents," Fox argued, trying to put his face in my line of vision. "So they know what's going on."
"Not right now, okay?" I said, looking up to meet his hard gaze.
"If you don't tell them, I will," he promised in an even tone.
We stared at each other in silence. I knew he wasn't lying when he said that. Fox was always truthful, at least to me.
I sent myself backwards, lying down on the bed and staring up at the ceiling. Fox was quick to follow. He laid on his side, reaching an arm out to pull me to him.
I couldn't stop the smile from sprouting on my face.
***
Walking into school the next morning was a strange experience. The heat of the gazes from my classmates burned into my skin, making sure I was aware of the stares I was receiving.
Trevor and Austin were standing at my locker by the time I arrived. Austin had an impressed look on his face as I walked toward them while Trevor looked like his usual friendly self.
"Why didn't you tell us you were dating Mr. Hottie himself, Fox Ridley?" Austin questioned with a wide, playful grin.
I sighed, stealing a glance at Trevor. He still looked like his usual self and that comforted me. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him.
"It didn't come up," I said with a shrug, moving to open my locker.
"Uh, you could've told us at the party," Austin countered, leaning against the locker next to mine. "When he came upstairs looking for you and stood real close."
"He didn't have to tell us, Austin," Trevor defended me with a pointed look.
I bit the inside of my cheek, my eyes staring down at my shoes before moving to Trevor.
"Look, Trev–" I started, letting out a breath. "I, uh, I didn't mean to keep it from you."
"It's okay–"
"It's just all so new and I didn't know who Fox was okay with knowing," I continued.
"Elijah, seriously," Trevor interjected, placing his hand on my shoulder. "It's okay. Fox deserved to come out in the way he wanted with you by his side."
Trevor smiled warmly at me while Austin was looking away from us.
"It's good that he has you," Trevor said kindly. "You're pretty great."
I chuckled, looking down at the floor. "I don't know about that."
Trevor laughed. "You could work on not being so self deprecating but other than that you're great."
"Where even is your boyfriend," Austin cut in, looking around the hall.
I glanced around and noticed some of the other hockey guys by their lockers, but Fox was nowhere to be found.
"I actually have no idea," I said as I continued my search for him.
A few moments later, Fox came storming down the hallway. His face was etched in an irritated frown and his cheeks were slightly red. Students in the hall parted to make a path for him as if he was blazing and creating the path himself. The glasses I adored sat on the bridge of his nose, his fingers roughly pushing them up as he made his way over to me.
"What's the matter?" I asked, my eyebrows raised as I took in his appearance.
Fox looked slightly disheveled, but the look was obviously good on him.
"I'm having the fucking worst morning of my life," he complained, pushing his glasses up again.
Austin had a sly smile on his face as he watched the two of us while Trevor looked as if he was figuring out if he should leave or stay.
"What happened?" I questioned.
"First of all I dropped my fucking contact on the floor and couldn't find it and realized I don't have any left," he started, his voice loud and snapping.
"Then," he continued. "My car wouldn't start and no one was home to give me a ride. Mom went to work early, Dad left last night for a business trip, Robin was already working, I have no idea where Raven is."
"So you had to take the bus?" I guessed. I was met by a glare from my boyfriend.
"No, the bus had already left!" he responded, his tone growing even more irritated. "So I had to wake Wren up to give me a ride and suffer through a car ride with him and he tried talking to me."
"Why didn't you just call me?" I asked, quirking my head to the side. "Josh and I could've picked you up."
"Because it's out of your way to come to my house then back to the school," he answered. "And now he has to pick me up after school so I can go order more contacts."
I let out a small laugh. "Maybe it's not such a bad thing to spend time with your brother."
He only responded with a glare.
Trevor cleared throat, gaining our attention. Fox's eyes widened slightly like he hadn't even realized Trevor and Austin were standing there.
"I'm really happy for you, Fox," Trevor said with an easy smile. "You should come to GSA when hockey is over."
"Oh, uh, thanks," Fox stuttered, giving Trevor a tight lipped smile. "Maybe I will."
"You guys are definitely the hottest couple in the school," Austin added with a laugh. "Although, the straight guys would probably say it's Lexa and Nadia."
I was surprised to hear Fox laugh at that. He seemed to relax a little bit, and for that, I was grateful. I didn't want him to be uncomfortable around my friends.
My eyes widened when I saw Josh walking toward us, but his eyes were only focused on Trevor.
"Hey," Josh called out, gaining the group's attention. "Can I talk to you, Trevor?"
Trevor's mouth gaped slightly and he silently nodded, following Josh down the hall.
"What the hell was that about?" Austin asked, a look of confusion on his face.
"Nothing," Fox and I said at the same time.
"Yeah, that's not suspicious at all," Austin sarcastically responded.
"I gotta go to my locker," Fox said, turning toward me and pecking me on the lips before rushing off.
I was left stunned at his public display of affection, my mouth parted as I watched him leave.
Austin groaned. "You guys are so hot."
I shook my head, laughing lightly as I playfully shoved him.
***
The locker room after school was silent as the team sat and waited for our coaches to talk to us. In the days after the tournament, they had spent their time in meetings with the league and the school board, figuring out what sort of consequences we would have to face.
Coach Silva and Coach Merton finally emerged from the office, coming to stand in front of all of us.
"I'm going to keep this short and simple," Coach Silva announced, looking around at each of us. "The principal has thankfully decided to leave the disciplinary actions to the league so this will not go on any of your school records."
The tension in the room relaxed at that. Some of the guys couldn't afford to have even more added onto their records.
"The league has decided that this team has to forfeit the next five games," he continued which caused an uproar of complaints. "That's all I could negotiate it down for."
"What about the other team?" Fox asked in a hard tone.
"They will forfeit six games," Coach Silva answered.
Fox scoffed, shaking his head and crossing his arms over his chest.
"They started it and had one of their coaches encouraging it and they only get one more game?" Fox spat. "That's bullshit."
"It is what it is," Coach Silva replied with a sigh. "We can't do anything about it now."
"This school is also banned from the tournament for the next two years," Coach Merton added. "Not that it matters to most of you since you're seniors."
"We should be grateful that your principal didn't decide to end our season despite what the league said," Coach Silva continued. "So let's just look at the positives. We will continue practicing tomorrow. We're done for today."
Murmurs of disappointment spread throughout the room. Fox looked frustrated, his face etched in a frown and his jaw tightly set. Ian looked down as he sat on the other side of me.
"This is going to fucking ruin me," he muttered, rubbing his forehead.
"It'll be fine," I tried to assure him. "We'll lose some momentum but we can still make it to the playoffs."
Ian shook his head. "Having to forfeit five games means that scouts won't even come near us."
I hadn't even thought of that.
"I don't get a scholarship, I don't go to college," Ian said in a low tone.
"Hey," Fox interjected, grabbing our attention. "You're going to college so shut up."
"You shut up," Ian snapped, leaning over me to yell at Fox. "My mom wanted to pull me off the team because of this. I had to remind her that I pay for it so she can't do shit."
"You're right, she can't do shit," Fox shot back.
I tried leaning back as far as I could while the two argued on either side of me.
"I can't afford to play anywhere without a scholarship, Fox," Ian said, his eyes narrowed. "It's my only way out of that fucking house and I can't do it."
"We'll figure it out," Fox replied in a low tone.
Ian sad back, a distant look on his face. He stood up and left the locker room without another word.
"Is everything okay with him?" I asked, concerned as I watched Ian leave. "He seemed fine on New Year's eve."
"That's because he was drunk," Fox said, standing up and heaving his backpack over his shoulder. "Ian's only ever that happy drunk."
"Is he okay?" I repeated, standing up with him.
"He'll be fine," Fox said with a nod as we started walking out of the locker room. "He's all doom and gloom at any inconvenience."
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