When I think about it, I don't suppose it is necessarily a gay thing. I'm guessing maybe small towns have similar issues. I'm talking about how we all seem to be connected. What I mean is, okay, Raven - you remember Raven? - Well, she had a younger sister named Katie. Katie had a common law husband named Ron. Ron's best friends name was Brent. Brent's mom used to be Ravens roommate. And... Brent was the man I chose to be the father of my baby.

Actually, Brent was his middle name. His first name was the same as his fathers. He also had several brothers who shared the same name. I swear.. I'll never understand enough about the male ego that would explain their desire to have a bunch of little rugrats running around with all the same names. It just seems so... inconvenient! Doesn't it?

Anyway, Brent was the name he went by. Man, he was so good looking! Six foot two; Light brown hair with natural streaks of blonde combed through it; Green eyes; Beard and moustache like he'd just forgotten to shave that morning. Katie said he'd married his high school sweetheart but they had recently separated. That girl had seriously done him wrong so, while he licked his wounds, he spent many an afternoon drinking beer and playing backgammon with his best friend, Ron. - You know, Ravens sisters' common law husband.

Raven had asked Katie to take care of her apartment while she was away. I was sort of in limbo, trying to figure out what I should do with my life, so I spent a lot of my time over there, hanging out with Katie. She was very different from Raven but they both shared that same kind of east coast swagger. It was an attitude that together with their brooklyn accent conveyed a toughness that screamed "you don't wanna fuck with me!" I really did love that.

Remember I said before that Raven had greatly influenced my decision to have a baby? Well, I suppose her sister unwittingly played a part in that as well. Katie and Ron had a baby girl, about 2 years old. I spent countless hours watching Katie interract with her daughter.

I know what you're thinking... Awww, [Sigh!] How sweet! Right? NOT EXACTLY! Wanna know what it really made me think?

I thought, "What A LOT of babies are!" "Oh my god! Oh My God! ! "

But then, Katie would put the baby in my arms and hand me a bottle... And I would sing her a lulluby that I remembered from my mother while I rocked her to sleep.

Okay. That was pretty great! Yep, I wanted one. I wanted one of my very own! Having a baby meant that - no matter what else happened in my life - there would always be someone who loved me best... no matter what! Yes. I wanted that.

You may be thinking I'm wrong about that, but i don't think so. See, I believe even when kids grow up, get married and have kids of their own, they still keep a special place in their hearts reserved just for their moms. Think about it...

Even abused children love their parents!

It was no secret I wanted to get pregnant. I talked to Katie about it all the time. And I told practically every guy that flirted with me!

"Oh, you wanna fool around? Cool! I wanna have a baby!"

Haha... You remember the way Fred Flintstone would pick up his car, put his bare feet down and start running but wouldnt move at first? Then, after a big cloud of dust built up, "TWANG!" he would take off like a shot from a wrist-rocket! You remember? Lol. That's my best description of the reaction I got from most of the boys when I said that! And the ones who didn't run away initially, pretty much flew the coop when I told them I wasn't wanting to share my baby with anyone. No obligation and no parental rights. That's how it had to be. I was not interested in sharing!

Anyway, like I said, Brent was at Katie's about as much as I was. He was so cute, I couldn't help but flirt with him! Especially because he radiated an "I'm not interested. Stay away!" vibe that my mind read as "CHALLENGE!" Hehe... What can I tell ya? He looked like fun to me! And when I found out he was 5 years younger than me, it was ON!