Change is inevitable but transformation is by conscious choice.

Heather Ash Amara

"You know, if you ever wanna scare a girl, this is a great way to do that. Just drag her to some weird barn...thing," Daphne said, voice filled with false bravado as she trotted alongside Luke into one of the many, many buildings on the Schuyler's property. Daphne really wondered what they even used half of them for.

The one they were entering in question, was empty, the floor covered with some mixture of hay and other trampled hard ground and Daphne couldn't help but flinch when another howl of wind ripped through the air.

Nobody had allowed her to back out of her agreement of finally shifting, and so it was the day after her birthday, icy cold outside and Daphne was already regretting agreeing. She wouldn't pull back now, but she couldn't help the fear in the pit of her stomach that was there and growing and growing with every minute.

Would she turn into a cold-blooded killing machine when she finally shifted?

Luke's wolf was content to be nothing more than a lapdog to her most of the time, sleeping in front of her bed and while Daphne wasn't scared of him (She wasn't. She never had been) , she would have been stupid not to recognise the strength that was behind these gleaming white teeth and the muscles that covered his body. When he had jumped after Harrison that had given her a peek at what an angry Luke in his wolf form looked like and that was not something that Daphne wanted to see again. He had been...majestic in his anger though, something that had given her pause.

She wondered belatedly if that was her bond talking, the same piece of her that had been totally on board with Luke protecting her from any bond interference.

Right now Luke seemed admittedly very amused while she was crossing her arms and glaring at him.

"Why are we here?" She finally asked with a sigh. "Shouldn't we be outside? You know, somewhere where the whole wolfing out thing happens?" She asked him snottily, resulting in Luke chuckling while he looked through the big barn doors that were still open.

"Because I don't want to stand around in the cold outside," Stephen Schuyler finally answered her seriously.

Fair enough.

"And we are not doing in inside the house, because I just got the Chair Rail done in the living room downstairs, and the last time we had somebody change in there, he ruined the whole downstairs area." It was obvious that Luke's father was still annoyed with that person.

"It was 8 years ago and it was Sebastian," Luke answered her unasked question. "He took apart the new sofa. It...took a little while before Christian got me out of the house."

"You mean when my brother threw his mate bodily through a window so that he would stop running berserk in our house," Stephen clarified drily. "No windows to jump through here."

"And if you go running, Daphne, please do us the favour and go into the forest? Otherwise, I am gonna have another discussion with the Major about there not being any wolves running around on my property but it being just a few overgrown dogs," Stephen requested with a sigh.

"That works?" She asked him, unable to believe that they actually kept the humans in Fairbury in the dark with excuses like that.

"Most of the time," Luke's father told her with a shrug. Daphne somehow didn't want to know what happened the rest of the time.

"So how does it...work?" She finally asked with a sigh. There was no reason to procrastinate anymore. She would get to meet her wolf before the day ended, and trying to get away from that wouldn't help anybody.

"You can try to meditate and pull your wolf to the surface that way," Stephen told her, grinning as she pulled a face at that. Thanks but no. "We can make you really upset until she comes up to protect you but...I don't think that will work for you."

"Or we'll let Luke have a go at it," Stephen finally suggested. Her wolf had only decided to come up that one time and that had been when Luke and she had been decisively intimate.

"I won't hurt him, right?" Daphne asked softly. "Because if I hurt him, I won't do it."

Then they would need to figure out another way. They would figure out a way. Maybe they should try to make her as upset as possible...maybe that would help. She didn't even want to know how that could be accomplished.

"You won't hurt him in any way if he protects himself," Stephen answered carefully and she raised an eyebrow at that.

"And will he do that?" She asked Luke pointedly who in turn was pointedly ignoring her and looking everywhere but at her.

"That depends on the situation. I would gladly take a few bruises if that means that my wife is comforted," Stephen gave back drily. "I can promise you however that whatever happens, the bruises he gets are going to be healed in two days.

"Fine," she finally agreed but not without another look at Luke, who was finally meeting her gaze, unapologetic. "Don't be stupid," she requested, but she already knew that that wouldn't help anything if the need arose.

He nodded his agreement though and she took another deep breath, trying to quench the nerves in her stomach.

It didn't feel fine. Not really. Not even when Luke sat down right where he had stood, holding out his arms for her.

She straddled him, trying desperately not to think about what they had done in that position a day ago and ignoring his father and her aunt that stood just a few steps away. It didn't work, but then Luke was there, touching her face, and pulling her down until her head rested again his chest, his heartbeat filling her ears.

She tried to concentrate on that, tried to make herself relax. She didn't want to fear the wolf that was slumbering within her. She didn't want to...be at odds with her for the rest of her life.

"Relax, sweetheart," Luke whispered, his big hands rubbing down her back, their heat palpable even under the thin tank top she wore.

She wore leggings and a tank top because her clothing would be ripped apart through the transformation and she hadn't wanted to sacrifice anything else for that.

"What will you do?" She asked Luke finally, trying to keep her breathing slow and even, taking to heart the whole spiel about relaxing and not fighting the transformation she had gotten from Stephen beforehand.

"I am going to touch your wolf," Luke answered drily.

"That sounds like both kinky and unfortunate all at once," Daphne blurted out, unable to help herself.

Seriously ?

Luke chuckled as he pulled her against her chest.

"It will be fine," he promised her, brushing a kiss against her hair. "She was always there, you know? Slumbering away underneath your skin. Always there to protect you. She took the edge off any pain you ever had...she made you heal faster, faster than most humans. She made it possible for you to survive ."

A part of Daphne wondered absentmindedly if Luke had really changed her when he had bitten her. Or if he had only awoken something that had always been within her. She couldn't remember if there was a moment that she met her wolf before, but a few memories were teasing at the edges of her mind that made her think that maybe Luke was a lot more right than she had thought before.

"She was the reason why you survived , Daphne. She is nothing to fear, she won't hurt you," Luke said quietly. "But I think you should really let her out to play one of these days..."

She could feel the shifting and twisting sensation in her chest, the warm there, the heat, the pressure. Daphne had always pushed back against that feeling, forced it down and down and down.

Not today.

This time she forced herself to relax and do nothing, to trust Luke.

"I know you are there, honey," he whispered, his voice dipping to something that Daphne had never heard him use before. "Will you come out to play ? Because your mate is looking forward to meeting you."

It went quickly and slowly all at once, the heat exploding from her chest, encompassing her. It didn't hurt. That was true. Nobody had lied about that.

It felt like her body was pressed on from every angle and side until something broke free. And then suddenly it wasn't her body anymore. Not really .

It was but it wasn't .

She hit her feet as nearly 200 pounds of snow-white wolf and promptly managed to have a freakout because that was Luke's voice. In her head .

*There you are, sweetheart *

It was like a knife into her brain, the feeling so foreign and weird that she could do nothing but scramble away from him, the screams of horror resulting in short high howls leaving her mouth...her snout.

Her hind legs hit the wall of the barn and she stared around, more hysterical noises leaving her throat, even when she could feel the edges of her brain flittering, could feel the instincts that told her to run, to get away, not to stay .

She couldn't fight, so running was the next best option. Especially if confronted with somebody much bigger and much stronger than her, a black wolf that stood a few feet away from her, his whole body thrumming with excitement his tail thumping the floor.

What was he excited about, why was he excited ? There was nothing to be excited about...other than her.

Fight or Flight?

For Daphne, the flight response won out immediately.

So she ran.

Straight into the forest.

She could still feel the words in her brain but didn't understand the meaning anymore. She still knew that she was human at least a bit. She still knew she was Daphne but she was so much more than that.

Everything seemed so much more.

The smell of the forest surrounded her, the ocean breeze rippling throughout the firs, the fresh snow that had only fallen the day before when they had had dinner at the Schuylers. She smelled the animal's movement through the forest, she smelt somehting...good.

She heard the sound of paws behind her, something that only resulted in her trying to be even quicker, the trees nothing more than smudges in her peripheral vision. As a human, she would have been scared to hit something at that speed that she was going. In her wolf form, the only thing her instincts told her was to get away. Far, far away from whatever was chasing her.

She jumped over a tree that had fallen down, the feeling of four paws hitting the ground both weird and natural all at the same time.

And as she ran, as the forest turned darker and as she recognised that she had no idea where she was, she faltered.

And that was all the other wolf needed. The impact of him catching here, of all of him boring down onto her, knocked the air out of Daphne.

It was a terrifying feeling when she tried to fight against the weight, failing and became more hysterical with the second.

* Stop it .* A voice ordered sharply, razor-sharp teeth just inches away from her throat, resulting in a high whine leaving her snout. *Stop running, sweetheart. It's okay, it's me.*

Luke. It was Luke. She fought against him again, but the terror in her chest eased. Now she was pissed off.

*There's nowhere to go, I'll just catch you again, you know that* Luke's voice sounded amused even in its disembodied state and she managed to get a hit against his ribcage in.

A sharp growl left his throat, a warning, the teeth scoring against her throat and her body grew lax at the sound of his growl. She couldn#t help the heat that as suddenly pooling in her body, couldn't help that suddenly she realised exactly how they were sprawled onto that forest floor.

Another sharp growl was all it took for her to bare her throat to him, trying to appease him.

*There you go, sweetheart,* he cooed.

She recognised what she had done near immediately, her brain jumping around and trying too figure out how she found this...good. It was good. Feeling his weight bearing down onto her, feeling his dominance over her...it felt good.

Alpha .

Now she understood.

His bulk disappeared from her, but she didn't move for a moment, trying to order her thought, still trembling from that revelation.

She stood up carefully, shaking out the snow from her fir. For the first time, Daphne caught a glimpse of her own bright white fur.

She looked at Luke, who somehow seemed even more intimidating than usual, with fur that was glossy black, no white to see anywhere.

*Back with us, Daphne?* Luke asked her gently.

*YES?!* Her thoughts were obviously too loud for him if his startling was anything to go by.

*Sweetheart, you can stop mentally screaming at me,* her mate told her amused and suddenly Daphne had the desire to tackle him in the snow and have a talk with him.

*NO; I CAN'T. IN ALL YOUR WEREWOLF 101 LECTURES YOU NEVER MENTIONED THAT YOU COULD TALK WITH YOUR BRAIN !*

***

To his never-ending amusement, Daphne as a wolf was the most adorable thing ever. Not even Thalia held a candle to a ball of fluffy white fur, with a glossy black nose and big round amber eyes, her tail nearly swishing constantly. She was also having far too much fun running around like newly born cub, jumping over trees and trying to climb the same.

He couldn't make her stop, not when her childlike joy was so obvious that it was nearly palpable.

Nor could the rest of the pack.

Oliver had taken one look at her and had burst out laughing, telling her that he had never met a wolf where their outer appearance fit the person within so perfectly. Daphne's reaction to that had resulted in her doing her best scary expression and trying to snarl, which had promptly resulted in her coughing loudly.

But right now, he was watching how she was trying to drink from the river, her pink tongue darting out and slobbering the cold and crystal clear water all over her own fur.

It didn't seem like she cared at all at the moment."

*She is doing pretty well,* Grace commented. *I don't think we had anybody that...enthusiastic in quite a few years.*

*Nah, not even Sebastian,* Ollie said amused. *You'll make quite the striking pair. You completely black, her so white that it nearly hurts...I don't think I have ever seen a white wolf.*

*Cyril Randall is apparently completely white. But he's the only one who I know off...* Luke answered absentmindedly. Not that he had ever seen the Alpha of New York in his wolf form.

*She's adorable ,* Ollie said with a grin when Daphne had decided that swiping at the fish was a better use of her time than trying to drink another time.

*Come here sweetheart, I'll teach you how to drink without slobbering all over yourself,* Luke offered. And maybe she would hopefully stop terrorising the poor fish. He somehow doubted that she would be able to catch one. Her coordination wasn't quite yet what it should be. *And don't fall into the river!* He exclaimed when that nearly happened as she balanced over a tree trunk.

She stopped playing around, trotting over to him and happily pressed as close to him as she possibly could, rubbing her head through his fur.

He was absentminded for maybe 10 seconds, but that was all she needed.

He caught the scent of a group of deers only when Daphne had already started scrambling after them.

*GRACE, SOME HELP HERE!* he exclaimed, running after his mate that had decided that she needed a midday snack. Not that he thought that Daphne herself had much to say at that moment.

He wasn't quick enough. By the time he reached her, Daphne had already leapt onto the deer, bitten through her throat, scarlet blood sloshing all over pristine white fur.

He hadn't expected that. At all.

Maybe it shouldn't have surprised him, but it did. And now he couldn't do anything about it anymore, because getting between Daphne and her kill was the most stupid thing he possibly could. That would end blood as well. But for him.

He didn't say anything, not wanting to startle her as she started to scarf down the meat like she hadn't eaten in months.

The first shift was always taxing for werewolves and they always needed to eat more afterwards but it had been a while since Luke had seen that a werewolf decided to go hunt for his lunch himself. Her actions had all been wolf and not really Daphne and he kept a careful eye on it, waiting for Daphne to resurface and have a freakout about the mess she had made with her own fur and the deer.

She didn't.

He kept watching her, a part of him far too pleased to see her able to provide for herself even when he wanted to be the one. He wanted to be the one hunting for her, bringing her food, killing that deer for her.

Luke crept closer to her carefully, waiting for any sign that she would turn to defend her kill. She didn't. At that moment Daphne was feral, wild, ferociously intent on her kill...and absolutely glorious .

She didn't seem to notice him, from where she was still having her fill but then amber eyes slipped up at looked at him. He expected her to growl in warning.

He didn't expect her to drag the carcass closer to him, obviously offering her kill to him.

It startling him and in the same instance, it was a punch in his gut when he recognised her doing the same thing he had done for her at the beginning of their relationship.

Just that his kill had been a whole lot less impressive than the deer Daphne had brought down at her first try.

She gave a high whine, again shoving the carcass close to him and he allowed himself to indulge in it. That pleased her if the tail thumping was anything to go by.

There was to hope that she was not going to have a freakout about that part later.

***

The transformation back was a whole lot pleasant.

When Daphne finally was back in her own body she was shivering like a leaf, even with the blanket that Caroline had wrapped her into.

"Get dressed and then you need to eat," her aunt told her gently but Daphne could just stare at her hands, ivory skin wrapped over fragile bones and try to unite the min her mind with the paws and long claws she had possessed just moments before.

"I killed a deer," she brought out as she closed her hands into fists. She remembered it. The blood sloshing inside her mouth, how pleased she had been when she had dragged that dead

"You did," Luke agreed softly, kneeling down next to her.

"Why?" She brought out, unable to hold the tears back that threatened to fall over her face. "I killed her. I am a coldblooded killer, I..."