Elisabeth Kübler Ross

On Thursday afternoon Daphne had done her homework together with Ollie, Luke and Grace, sandwiched there between the Schuyler siblings. She and Luke had done their Math homework together, easily able to manage it between the two of them.

On Friday, she had gone to school again, had ignored the glances and whispers as people still saw her as the new girl. She had ignored it to the best of her ability. She had given Kyle and Haley a wide, wide berth, not in the mood of another confrontation. And otherwise, she had just stayed quiet.

Art club was great as it pretty much meant she could do whatever she wanted and could go ask Mrs Foster, the art teacher every questions she had.

And Kiana was great as well, happily introducing her to anybody they met.

Still, when Friday evening came...she knew that she couldn't keep on ignoring what was looming on the horizon.

She sat down in front of her window after dinner, leaning against the footboard of her bed, ignoring the dull ache that this resulted for her back.

Daphne could do this. Somehow she was going to get through that day tomorrow, without breaking down. Somehow.

She started with pencil. She knew exactly what she wanted to paint. That wouldn't be a problem. Not really. There was only one truly perfect day that she could remember with her mother.

Daphne couldn't remember how old she had been. She must have been young, not yet in school. Maybe 3? 4?

They had went to Coney Island. Daphne couldn't remember why. She couldn't remember much of that visit. She remembered the sandy beach, the ferris wheel, the bright blue balloon she had held on to...she remembered chocolate ice cream.

But most of all, she remembered her mother's hand in hers. She remembered the sine of the sun, the smell of sun screen and the ocean, and the feeling of Michelle holding her hand.

It was a snapshot of a memory. Daphne couldn't remember more than a few seconds of that. She remembered nothing else of that day, only that.

She remembered that moment with total clarity though.

She painted the Ferris wheel in the sunset, a silhouette of her mother in front, in black charcoal. Daphne couldn't bear to put her mother in colour to try and match the colour of her hair or her blue eyes or the colour of the sunny yellow blouse she had worn that day.

Daphne worked on it until it was dark outside, even when Caroline came to tell her goodnight. She worked on it until her back hurt, her hands were aching and her eyes burning. Only then she stopped, setting the charcoal and crawling into bed.

The day of her mother's funeral came bright and early.

Caroline was flitting through the kitchen doing god knows what, while Oliver was fighting with his tie until Matthew took pity of him and Daphne watched the tableau of a happy family from her place from the kitchen table. She felt like she was a viewer intruding into something she had no right to.

They tried so hard to carve out a place for Daphne and still...it didn't seem real. It didn't seem like it could be right.

Life in Fairbury was so easy. There was no worry about money, no worry about being quiet or her mother would go on one of her rampages. It was easy. Too easy.

And then it was time to go to church and suddenly it wasn't easy anymore.

Daphne wore a black knitted dress, one of the things they had bought on the shopping trip and a black coat that Caroline borrowed her.

They arrived, were greeted by the priest and then she stood in that church, a congregation fo people around there that she didn't even know, that she couldn't have remembered ever meeting.

She didn't cry. She had thought she would, but all of it seemed to be so far away. Everything seemed to melt away.

There was Daphne herself and then there was that invisible wall that kept everybody away from her.

Nothing seemed to really reach her. It was the same glass box she had felt just shortly after her Michelle's death.

There was a dark casket in the front of the church that held her mother's body but Daphne didn't...she couldn't believe that.

She didn't want to.

The priest droned on and on about life and death and resurrection and mercy and Daphne only stared with morbid fascination to that casket that held Michelle's body.

She sat between Caroline and Oliver, Caroline having starting to silently weep just after the priest started speaking. The only thing Daphne could muster the strength to do was to lay her hand on her aunts arm while she continued to cry into Matthew's shoulder.

She watched as her mother's casket was carried out of the church, Ollie and Matthew being two of the pallbearers.

Her aunt kept a near painful grip at her hand as they followed the casket to the cemetery was tucked away behind the church.

Caroline was crying, heart wrenching sobs escaping her. Daphne couldn't.

Her mother's casket was lowered in the grace in that section of the cemetery where other members of her family had been laid to rest over the years.

The names there meant nothing to Daphne.

But as she watched the casket being laid to rest, the priest continuing his service, there was one feeling that slowly blossomed in her chest.

Relief.

Relief that Michelle was dead and couldn't lay another hand on her.

Relief.

Relief hat Daphne didn't need to worry about paying for water and electricity anymore that she didn't need to have three jobs and go to school anymore.

Relief that her mother was dead and couldn't hurt her anymore.

Relief that Daphne would never need to carefully throw away the empty whisky bottles.

Relief.

Daphne was disgusted with herself for feeling that.

She stood there, stone-faced and quiet, not a single tear escaping her.

She threw the dirt on the casket when it was her turn. And then the drawing she had made, that fluttered to lay on top of it.

It seemed like half of the town was awake and attending that funeral to pay their respect.

She wondered if they did that because of her mother or because Caroline and Matthew seemed to be well liked by practically everybody. Probably the second reason. Her mother hasn't been home in Maine for nearly 20 years before her death. And Daphne really doubted that anybody actually cared that she was dead.

Her aunt still cried, while Daphne just stood next to Ollie staring emptily in front of herself.

There was a wake at the house later, Daphne having taken to sit on the couch and staring down at her lap.

The people left her in peace mostly, muffled conversations going on. Oliver still didn't leave her side and she saw him glare at everybody that dared to approach her.

She was alone now. Utterly and completely alone.

People said they were sorry for her loss and suddenly she was so angry. So very angry.

Because she really wasn't sorry for her loss.

Was it even a loss? Yes, Michelle had died but she couldn't hurt her anymore. Something that had become more common with every passing week.

Why was she supposed to be sad that Michelle had died?

***

The funeral was bad. Just like Luke had predicted.

Caroline's scent of grief and sadness and devastation filled the church and Luke sat next to his sister, whose eyes never once left her mate. Luke's concentration was split between Daphne and surveyed the room.

Daphne's scent was there as well but it wasn't...in comparison to Caroline, her very much human scent was far less obvious and a whole lot less devastated.

Caroline cried throughout the whole church service, while Daphne just stared to the front, her face completely slack, not betraying a single emotion.

The church service went off without a hitch. Thankfully.

He watched Ollie and Matthew and his father carry the casket, joined by three other members of their pack.

He watched Caroline clutch at Daphne and Daphne just stay as absent as before. Her eyes were empty, vacant and the only thing Luke wanted to do was to wrap her up in his arms.

He wanted to put her somewhere safe and hold her there until she looked at him with something other than this vacant expression.

He hated this. Hated this with every fibre of his being. His mate was upset and he couldn't do a single thing to fix it. He was used to fixing things.

And in that moment, he just wondered if she wasn't broken so badly that there was nothing to fix anymore.

When he stepped forward to drop dirt onto the casket, her drawing was already half covered. He could see the muted colours, the silhouette of a mother and daughter there, in front of a ferris wheel...and he could feel the grief in that picture.

There was a wake at the Hyde's House later, the whole house being filled with what seemed to be the whole of Fairbury awake and attending.

Caroline was crying hysterically on the backporch, Matthew and his mother trying to comfort her. He could hear all of that, and he wasn't the only one.

Oliver and Daphne were sitting on the couch in the living room, Daphne not even lifting her head if anybody approached and seemingly just having completely shut down.

"This was a terrible idea," Sebastian commented in a huff and Luke tended to agree with his uncle's husband. It was a terrible idea if that was anything to go by.

He turned to watch the two of them again, Ollie growing more agiated. It didn't surprise him Luke at all. If his mother would be crying and his sister seemingly having shut down completely, he doubted that he would be able to be actually reasoned with.

Right now, he just wanted to be near his upset mate.

"I'll sit with her," he decided. If nothing else, at least he could keep anybody from approaching her. "Grace?" He asked his sister who just nodded thankfully.

"I'll take Ollie outside," she whispered.

"Are you sure that's a good idea, Luke?" His uncle cautioned him, a hand on his arm. He needed to push down the instinct of growling, because his wolf felt like Uncle Drew was keeping him away from his mate.

Luke knew that was ridiculous. Andrew only worried about Daphne, like every member of his pack did in their own way.

"I highly doubt I can make it any worse," he sighed and then steeled himself to make his way over.

***

"I'll...I'll go look after mom. I...Luke is going to stay with you, alright?" Ollie whispered and Daphne just nodded.

Ollie left her alone, his place being taken by Luke nearly immediatley. She felt the sofa dip again

"My sincere..." he started but she just shook her head.

"Don't." She pressed out. She couldn't bear to hear that right now. She lifted her hands to her face, burying it in them. She just wanted...

"How many of these people actually knew her?" She asked Luke, distracted herself. Why had they even bothered to show up?

"They aren't here for her. They are here for Caroline and for you," he told her softly and she looked at him startled.

He wore a black suit and black tie with a white shirt, a sharp departure from what she had seen him in before. He seemed far older than the 17 he was at that moment to her.

"They don't know me," Daphne protested. Why would they show up for her?

"They don't," he allowed. "But they can give you the respect of showing up." They could give her mother the respect of showing up and Daphne couldn't even give her mother the respect of actually feeling upset about her death.

She buried her face back in her hands, not wanting to look at anybody.

"I am a terrible daughter," she whispered. She felt relieved about her own mother's death. She felt like she wanted to die herself for that.

He didn't say anything for a moment.

"Everybody deals with grief differently," Luke finally said, his voice soft, obviously trying to soothe her and that just made her angry. She didn't deserve to be soothed.

"I know. I heard the whole yada, yada from the therapist they made me see," Daphne told him. "Your feelings are valid, whatever they are," she repeated cyncially.

"They are," Luke whispered. "Your feelings are valid. You aren't a bad person for feeling like you do. You aren't," He repeated.

For some reason that was it what shattered the glass box. The first sob broke through her and then he touched her shoulder softly.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," he soothed her and she couldn't help herself but lean into the touch.

Luke didn't pull back, he pulled her against himself in a tight hug, settling her head against his shoulder.

He was warm and solid and smelled like salt and surf and she buried her face in the fabric of his jacket. Daphne sobbed against his shoulder, not caring in the least that she was crying against somebody she didn't even know.

"I know it doesn't feel like that, but you are going to be fine," he whsipered, one of his big hands cupping her head.

Her control finally snapped and all of it overwhelming her.

He made soft shushing sounds when she continued to cry, one arm around her waist, his other hand holding the back of her neck.

She felt safe.

For once in her life, she felt safe. Like this. In the arms of a boy she didn't even know, but something told her that she could trust him. Trust him with this and let him comfort her to the best of his abilities.

Even when everything was too much, he was there holding her tightly.

Daphne let the pain rip through her, for once not trying to push it down. It felt like her heart was being ripping in two parts, slowly but surely. She couldn't take, she couldn't bring out another noise but sob louder.

Sob after sob escaped her, muffled through Luke's shoulder. Daphne didn't know how long she cried against him.

Finally, the sobs stopped, her whole body still shaking against Luke's but she didn't want to move. The tears kept running, unable to be stopped.

"Daphne," he whispered softly. "Why doesn't Kiana help you upstairs and you can take a nap?" He asked her.

A nap? That seemed to be the best idea she had heard in months.

She lifted her head from his shoulder, wiping away the tears that kept running.

"Thank you," she brought out, unable to look at him. He probably thought she was some kind of total nutjob now.

"Whatever you need," Luke gave back calmly and she stared at him as he reached out to wipe away another tear from her cheek.

"Go take a nap, Daphne," he told her, the voice soft but somewhat in there that made her want to do just as he had told her.

***

His cousin kept an arm around her, walking her up the staircase and he looked after her, not being able to keep a grimace from his face.

She really wasn't dealing well with this.

He had expected this. Of course he had. Her mother had died. Of course she would be upset. She had grief to deal with.

But there was more. Something else. He couldn't write put his finger on it, but something was wrong. Something that had nothing to do with her mother.

And Luke needed to know what that was, before it got even worse.

"We should start encouraging people to head out," his father commented softly to him and Luke just nodded, unable not to keep on listening for Daphne and Kiana upstairs.

Daphne seemed to have crashed on the bed as soon as it was near her and his cousin was already coming down again.

Daphne's heartbeat was calm and steady and that calmed him, even when he would give everything to keep her there in his arms.

The memory of that would need to be enough for the next few weeks. He had breathed in her scent, had felt her warm body next to his. She was fine. Physically.

Physically she was fine and she was safe and it was going to be fine.

Luke would just need to continue telling himself that.

Kiana slipped down the stairs then, arriving at his side.

"She's asleep," Kiana told him quietly and he nodded. "Just knocked out as soon as she saw the bed."

"Dad told us to start empty out the house," Luke told her softly.

"I'll let the rest of the pack know," she answered with a sad smile.

Slowly but surely the house started to empty, helped by 80 percent of the attendees being werewolves, who had noticed that this really wasn't going well at all.

Kiana said her goodbyes

with her father, Luke's Uncle Richard and his Aunt Lucille.

Ollie and Grace arrived a few minutes later, when the house was empty apart from Luke and his father and Luke could smell the forest all over them. Grace had probably talked her mate into going for a run, marking the territory.

"Where's Daphne?" Ollie demanded to know and Luke just looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"She's taking a nap upstairs," He gave back calmly. He watched Oliver take a deep breath, smelling his surroundings and then zeroed in on Luke.

"Why is her smell all over you?" Oliver asked him indrediously.

Luke opened his mouth, trying to think on answer that didn't sound...as intimate as what really happened. Kiana decided to be not helpful.

"She cried on Luke for around ten minutes," Kiana said amused of all things and Ollie grew furious.

"What did you do?" He growled at Luke.

"Ollie." Grace put a hand on her mate, trying to keep him calm. Luke's wolf was not amused at that growling, while Luke himself could understand Oliver's reaction but was dreading the end result of this.

He somehow doubted that his final admission would go over well.

"I didn't do anything," Luke said, a warning tone in his voice, the alpha wolf creeping in and telling Ollie that his behaviour was not appreciated.

"She doesn't need...She doesn't need to get her heart broken from you. She's off limits for you," Ollie snapped at him. It was a punch to his stomach but Luke didn't outwardly react to it.

He pushed down as hard as he could, not reacting to what he regognised as a challenge to his fledgling mating bond. He didn't growl at Ollie, telling him to fuck off or even growled. He just looked at his friend.

"I am not playing with her." This was the only sentence he pressed out.

He wasn't playing with Daphne. Daphne was his damn future. She was going to be his wife, the mother of his children, if Luke had one single thing to say about this.

He was never going to play with her, or use her as a distraction as he had been prone to do before. Daphne was far too important for that.

"That's even worse. She's human, Luke. She isn't your mate. Leave her alone," Ollie demanded and Luke could just keep himself from rolling his eyes.

Yeah right. She wasn't his mate. That's why he wanted to roll himself around in his scent.

"The only girl I am interested in is my mate," he said. Luke was very much aware that he was mincing words at that point. And Ollie would be furious when he finally found out the truth.

"So what, you are going to stay abstinent until you find her or something?" Ollie snorted, suddenly amused and Luke just glared at him.