《This Girl I Met》30
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It's been fourteen minutes.
My eyes naturally fall on the ground. I should've expected that, or at least seen it coming or something. How was I dumb enough to think she actually gives a shit about me ? Everything we shared only was an amazing friendship to her. But now, I don't even know if we're still friends after all. At least, we both know that something almost happened during Alex's birthday, and it wasn't friendly. At all.
Now I can't help but think that I should've kept my mouth closed. If I hadn't told anyone I loved her, maybe I would have been able to pretend I don't have any feelings. But now it's done, and the words spread in the atmosphere like a virus. I can't take them back, so for now I am just hoping she doesn't hear that from anyone. I trust in Moe and Cari, but I don't know about people talking behind my back.
I get up and start walking away, my hands in my pockets. She didn't show. Shoe doesn't want anything to do with me beside soccer. A tear is running down my cheek, while I am silently swallowing my saliva. Love sucks.
When I reach the corner of the street, I just look up at the moon, and just put my middle finger up at the stars. When I was younger, I used to think stars were windows from which dead people would watch the real world. So I look straight at one of those stars, and let a small 'fuck' slip in between my lips.
But after a few seconds of total silence, something happens.
"Lindsey !" a oh-so-familiar voice yells behind me.
As I turn around, I only catch eyes with her for less than a second, before she basically jumps on me because she was running too fast.
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Emily crashes her lips on mine, wrapping both her arms and legs around me. I hold her the best that I can, but we end up falling on the grass that is just next to the street. As we both are lying on the side, I grab her neck and pull her closer. Our nose touch, and I am not patient enough. I want to taste her lips again, longer this time. So I grab her jacket and pull her closer. This time, our kiss is more agressive, filled with a passion that is a brand new feeling for me. Minutes goes by, but I don't see the clock running out of time. Just an endless moment of pure happiness, of feelings flying in the air and in my stomach, and my head just thinking one hundred miles a second.
It's just us, in the cold, our bodies glued to each other, our lips perfectly fitting. I know I am in love with her.
...
"Lindsey !" a familiar voice yells at me.
I jump, brought out of my transe. I shake my head. God, my imagination is playing me again. I look up, only to catch eyes with some endless ocean. I shiver, and she just looks at me, quite surprised.
Keep it together, Lindsey. It was only just a dream, I think to myself, more disappointed than I wish I'd be. I know I need to focus, because her showing up to my rendez-vous is real life this time, and she seems worried.
"You came" I observe, watching her as she is sitting next to me, nervously playing with her fingers.
The only good thing I can tell myself right now is that I am the only reason why she's nervous, and I love making her nervous. That makes me feel like I have a little bit of power left on someone.
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I bite my lips, a move that she caught. She just blushed when she is staring at my lips, before lifting her eyes and saying :
"Of course I came" she says.
The only thing I can think of saying is : "Why though ?"
She looks at me, quite surprised. She then blushes, and tries to keep a straight face, but just can't. So she giggles.
"Because I care"
"You care ?" I repeat, raising my eyebrows.
She smirks. "About you, weirdo."
"Mmh." I let out, thoughtful.
When we catch eyes, the only thing I think of doing is what I have been dying to do for a very long time.
Since we are sitting next to each other, and that I obviously am the tallest one between the two, I start leaning in first. When she sees me getting closer, she just freezes. She isn't pushing me away, just like the other night. Her intense gaze is on me, and then suddenly slip on my lips. She starts leaning in too, and when our noses touch, I just close my eyes. The only warmth of her breath against my lips is enough to make me feel butterflies and shit.
I just decide to close the gap between us.
My lips softly trap hers, as she seems to straighten a little bit. After a few seconds, she brings her hand to my neck, kissing me back. I wrap my arms around her waist, while she is just deepening the kiss.
I would lie if I said that her suddenly breaking the kiss didn't bother me. It's quite the opposite. I am about to tease her about it, but when she gets up and starts freaking out, putting her hands on her head, I just restrain myself from doing so and get up as well.
Her eyes are filled with tears. "Shit !" she curses, staring at me, and then at the sky. "Shit, shit, shit !"
"Em, it's okay, the sky won't fall on us" I say, but she doesn't seem to listen to me. So I just grab her wrists and start again : "Emily, it's okay. We're okay."
"N-no" she says, taking her hands back. I frown. "Y-you don't understand, there is something I need to say to you..."
This time, I start feeling sick. "What ? What's wrong, Em ? You can tell me everything !" I then think for a second. "We don't need to rush things, okay ? It's scary for me too, it's my first time actually kissing someone I like, and I don't want things to get awkward and-"
"Lindsey" she tries to interrupt me, but she can't.
"... you know, if you want us to stay just friends, it's ok-"
"Drew and I are dating !" she yells.
I stop breathing.
(A/N : I hope I'm still your Kweeny *insert panicked emoji*)
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