'Sleep, sleep, my love, my only, Deep, deep, in the dung and the dark; Be not afraid and be not lonely! This.' — E.B. White

"Nandha" Nandha froze as the voice of her husband rang in her ears. It was bitter sweet hearing her name from his lips.

She looked up and found him looking at her with some many emotions in his eyes. Panic griped her hard as she looked at him with fear evident in her eyes. Invisible hands clasped over her mouth, making it hard for her to breath. But soon sanity seemed to have crashed upon her, just like her dreams.

The warmth his arms has provided her a few seconds before seemed to have vanished completely as her chocolate orbs looked into his light brown orbs. She was so lost in her moment of joy in being his arms that she completely forgot what had been happening between him and her for the past few days.

She forgot, he was not the same man she fell in love with.

She forgot, his heart no longer belongs to her.

She forgot, she meant nothing to him.

"I....I..." She stuttered not knowing what to say. She wanted to talk to him but she couldn't. The invisible hands were drowning her words, not wanting her to even feel a drop of hope in her heart.

The wounds inflected by him on her body might have healed but the ones he infected on her soul is still bleeding. The fear and pain infected by him broke the walls of confidence she had built in her. Now she has became a girl who was afraid of her own shadow. The one he molded with his own hands.

The way Nandha would flinch or shiver every time he moved his hands, did not escape from his keen eyes were observing her from the moment he woke up. The way she was shivering in his presence made it hard for him to even look at her without wanting to break down. Her this subconscious actions were like salt, they kept rubbing themselves against his wounds, hurting him.

'You did this. You made her like this.' His heart screamed in agony. He knew his heart was right. His heart has always been right.

He gritted his teeth, trying to bite down the immense pain he was feeling right now. He felt immense hatred on himself for breaking her like this. He felt his ribs heaving as if they were bound by ropes, straining him. He should have listened to his heart that day and should not have let his anger over power his mind.

Her eyes were a rich dark brown that were so deep, they reminded him of his sleepless nights, awake, staring into complete darkness. He felt compelled to look deeper, searching for something inside her, but her soul was covered and her eyes would not show him. This was not the woman he fell in love with. The one beside him is the woman he molded with his anger, the one he build with broken glasses.

Before she could speak another word, he got up from the mattress and walked out of the chamber, with a heavy heart. He didn't want to leave her but he didn't have much choice. He needed to leave her, if not his presence would end up destroying the last bit of hope they had in their relation.

'Arya, please don't leave me, again. Please stay. Please, just this once, don't leave me.' Her heart pleaded yet no words left her lips. A lonely tear ran down her cheeks as her eyes gazed at the disappearing form of her husband.

He left her again.

He left her again, all alone to dwell with her broken heart.

He felt her like every other day but this time he broke the little hope she had in her heart.

Now she was sure there was no going back. She had completely lost him. The relation that was a bud has been cut off without letting it to grown into a beautiful flower. And who was there to blame for it, apart from herself.

'I'm sorry, Nandha. I hurt you. I broke you. I let you down. But I swear I will do everything thing in my power to bring back the old Nandha, even if it meant distancing myself from you.' His heart whispered as he walked away from her.

She cried for him, for her breaking marriage, for her love and he, he left her again, he walked away from her with a grief filled heart and a vow to himself. If only he knew he was piercing her already wounded heart with glass in the name of giving her space.

Sometimes unspoken words become powerful enough to break a heart. They misunderstand the silence, hurting themselves and their loved ones. They kept walking through the thorns with bleeding feet as they kept destroying themselves in the name of love.

~*~

"No mamashree. I'm not attending the swayamvar." Duryodhana yelled making Shakuni jump in fright.

"But putra, why? You love her the kalinga rajkumari, right? Then why are you saying no in attending the swayamvar. Here I thought you would be happy knowing the news of the swayamvar but alas I'm wrong. What happened, putra?" Shakuni asked confused.

"Mamashree, I don't know who or what gave you the impression that I love Bhanu, but let me tell you this, in this whole aryavart there is only one woman who hold my heart and that is Nandha. There is no place for Bhanu or any other woman in my life nor my heart in this life. I won't be able to give other woman the same love and desires I have for her. The place Nandha have in my heart is irreplaceable." Shakuni looked at Duryodhana, shocked.

'How can he say that?' Shakuni thought to himself. 'He had planned and executed everything so well, then where did it go wrong. What magic has the girl done on his nephew that now he is openly refusing to obey his words.'

"How can you love that girl even after everything, putra? Did you forget how you found her and that panduputra Nakula in that chamber? She doesn't deserve you, putra. She is using you, my child. She doesn't love you." Shakuni implored wanting his nephew to realize the folly in her love.

"Mamashree, stop it. Stop smearing her character, her name. I believe her. What happened that night was a complete misunderstanding. If only I had controlled my anger and let her speak, then all this misunderstandings and accusations would have been cleared and long forgotten." Duryodhana said, his words firm and unarguable.

"Putra, you are not thinking properly. You are throwing away a precious jewel like Bhanumati for what? For the fleeting feelings you have for Alaknandha. You are not thinking about the positives that would come along with Bhanumati. You are just thinking about the pleasure that your wife is providing to you. She is making you drunk in madness. She is destroying you in the name of love." Shakuni sneered.

"You are right, mamashree, I'm only thinking about Nandha. I don't want to destroy the last hope blooming in my relationship by bringing another woman in my life. I'm completely drunk but not in madness but in her love. And let me tell you this mamashree, I love Nandha. My love for her is instinctive, deep, and unshakable. I will burn down every obstacle that would try to separate her from me." Duryodhana declared. His keen eyes did not miss out the way his mamashree's expressions changed with his each word.

"You have changed, putra." Shakuni stated after a second of hesitation.

"Yes, I have changed. I know, I'm no more the same guy who thirsted after the thrown, who didn't hesitate before eliminating people for his selfishness. I'm a new version of Duryodhana. The past few days have taught me a lot, mamashree. I'm more clear in my views now. But please don't try to underestimate this new Duryodhana, because the new one is more dangerous than the previous one. You know why? Because this is Nandha's Duryodhana." Duryodhana divulged, before turning around and walking out of the chamber leaving Shakuni all alone to ponder upon his nephew's words.

Shakuni looked visibly shaken by his nephew's confession. He was completely smacked out at the way the things were turning against him. This is not what he expected. This is not what he wants. If he doesn't stop his nephew now, then all the plans he had laid ahead will come to dust.

~*~

Nandha looked at her mother-in-law in expectation as she anxiously waited for her to tell the reason as to why she was summoned to her room at this odd hour. It was not every day mata Gandhari would summon her to her chamber at the dawn of the night. A part of her was hopeful while the other part of her tried to chock her with fear as she waited for mata to speak.

"Putri, earlier this day we had received an invitation from Amernath. Your father is organizing the swayamvar of your elder sister, Ardika." Nandha let out a shaky breath, hearing the words of Gandhari.

'I know.' Nandha's heart and mind screamed. Her eyes teared up with tears of longing as a small smile traced its way on her lips.

"Along with the invitation, a letter too has arrived. Your father has asked for your presence for the swayamvar. As a father, arya understands the integrity of the situvation and has decided to grant your father's request." Gandhari said with a gentle smile.

"What? Really, Mata?" She asked not being able to believe what she had just heard.

"Yes Putri. Day after tomorrow, you shall start your journey to Amernath. Pitamaha Bishma has arranged for everything. You don't have to take any tension in that matter." Gandhari replied with a soft chuckle.

Nandha looked utterly shocked and surprised as the words of Gandhari started to sink in. She is going to see her family again. She is gonna see her Pitashree again. She is going to meet her brother and sister. She is getting the chance to be a part of her sister's wedding, a chance she thought she would never get.

A smile of joy and satisfaction lit up her eager face. She smiled not knowing how this one trip to Amernath was going to change the entire course of her life.