"Miles, for the love of God, get out of the damn shower!" I yelled through the door for the fifth time, pounding my fist on the door.

A moment later the stream of water stopped hitting the bottom of the bathtub.

"Finally," I muttered. I ran my hand through my sweaty ponytail, practically shivering at my own disgustingness. I know for a fact that I had called getting in the shower first, but somehow the bathroom door slammed shut before I could even gather up my towel and pajamas.

Midway through me yanking more knots out of my unruly hair, the bathroom door banged open with a rush of steam exiting like out of some kind of magic show.

I waved my hand in front of my face to push away the hot air, and I definitely was happy that I did.

Miles stepped out of door frame into the hotel room with only a towel wrapped around his waist. Droplets of water dripped down his chest and ran down his forhead. His hair was plastered down in some places, but also was mused in others from a hand running through it repeatedly.

I was embarrassingly blatantly staring at his muscular upper body that I have seen quite often, but right now, it looked even more yummy than usual. However, my mind flitted to the fact that the only thing covering Miles from going all natural was a small white hotel towel. My face tinged a light pink at the very thought. It didn't stop me from continuing to let my eyes travel over his chest and abs. Of course, I was caught in my open ogling.

"You know I wasn't sure if you would be open to licking me dry, but with that look you're currently giving me, it might not be such a longshot," Miles said cheekily. His hand reached up to run another hand through his hair, obviously flexing his bicep for emphasis.

As much as I appreciated his beautiful arms, I scoffed in "disgust" (more like my own mortification) and shoved him out of the way, so I could get in the bathroom.

I closed the door in his face before he could follow in after me.

"So is that a no then?" he called from the other side of the door.

"Go do it yourself," I yelled back, locking the door, so I wouldn't have any unwelcomed visitors midway through my shower.

"That won't be as much fun."

"Then go get one of the guys to help you."

There was a long pause before he finally replied with, "No, I think you would do a better job."

I pulled the jersey over my head and shook my head at the door. Idiot.

"What? Do you wanna be licked dry instead?" he asked, after realizing I wasn't going to answer.

"No! Could you just go get dressed and go bother someone else for a while?" I snapped at him from the other side of the door. I unbuttoned my pants and yanked each leg out. Not that I wouldn't mind at all him licking me dry, but I didn't want him to be aware of that.

There was a huff from the room. "But you're so much more fun to bother," he whined.

"Miles!"

"Okay, okay."

The quiet from the other side of the door only lasted a few seconds before he was listing other ideas to me again.

"You know, I don't feel all the way clean, so do you mind if I hop in there with you? It'll go quicker," he prodded.

The amount of times that he has suggested we take a double shower is more than I can count on two hands.

"Go away or I will seriously hurt you," I threatened. I would most definitely follow through with that threat, and he knew it.

He let out a sigh before finally walking away.

I finally stripped down by the time he decided to move on from annoying me. He had been poking fun at me more than usual today and I was close to losing my mind.

We had just played in the game before the quarterfinals and had barely won. We were at yet another hotel in the middle of who knows where. Everyone was however, super hyped because we were one of the eight remaining teams left. I was just excited as them. We had worked hard for this, and it was really paying off now.

I twisted the shower handle and let the water warm up before stepping in. Pouring shampoo into my hand and scrubbing my head, my thoughts went back to Miles, and unfortunately, his very sculpted body. It was still hard for me to believe that I kind of "owned" that.

I froze at my own thoughts. Owned? Did I really have any ownership of him at all? We weren't in a real position for me to even think that, but what position were we even in anyway? Was this just some summer fling? We didn't live near each other or even in the same state. In realty, could this really go past this summer? As much as I wanted this to continue for a lot longer than the twoish weeks we had left in camp, I couldn't say Miles felt the same way. He could very well think that after this camp ended he would go back to Pennsylvania and I would go back to Maryland and never speak again.

My mind churned at a rapid pace at what exactly was going to happen after these last two weeks. Did I really want this to be over? The answer was very clear.

Hell no.

I had met someone that I care about more than anyone I have ever met. I was not just going to let this end, or at least, not without knowing what Miles wanted. We were going to talk about it.

I rinsed my hair of the shampoo and lathered my strands with conditioner.

I needed to know. If he didn't want this to continue, than I would at least have closure that it was going to be over.

After scrubbing the rest of the dirt off my body with body wash, I rinsed off and turned off the water. Grabbing the other towel from the rack, I dried off and put on my pajamas. I then wiped any remaining eye makeup off and took out my contacts, replacing them with my glasses. Running a comb through my wet, tangled hair, I gave myself a quick final pep talk.

I twisted the door knob and stepped out into the little hallway by the door and closet. Taking one step towards the main room, I halted when I heard two voices talking quietly. I strained my ears to hear what they were saying from around the corner.

"-need to grow a pair and tell her," one voice advised. The deeper baritone told me it was Jackson.

"I can't. I don't-," I couldn't hear the last part of Miles's sentence because his voice went softer.

He doesn't want to what?

"You're just going to end up hurting yourself and her, if you don't," Jackson replied. He sounded frustrated.

I gnawed on my bottom lip, trying to hear the rest of the conversation. Instead, the couch springs made a sound, signalling someone was getting up. Realizing I was in a slightly compromising position with my body plastered to the wall and leaning my head towards the other room, I spun around and ran into the bathroom. I grabbed a towel and re-exited the bathroom, drying my hair, when Jackson came around the corner.

"Hey!" I greeted him, doing my best to sound normal and not like I just was eavesdropping on their conversation.

Jackson seemed a bit startled when I popped out the door like I did, but he quickly covered it up and gave me his usual warm smile.

"Hi Glors."

"Leaving already?" I asked.

"Yeah, I just needed to talk to Miles for a quick sec."

I was put off when Jackson actually called him by his first name instead of lover boy like he has been referring to him when talking to me.

"I'll see you later then."

"Bye."

Something was very off with him, and it was really freaking me out, considering the conversation I just overheard.

I moved on from it however, and stepped into the main area of the hotel room. Miles was laying on the bed closest to the couch with his hands rubbing his face in what looked like frustration. He didn't hear me come in, so I cleared my voice softly. His head snapped up and his eyes met mine.

"Nice shower?" he asked, breaking the silence we were in.

"Much needed," was the only thing I could offer.

"I bet it would have been better if I was in there with you," he stated, giving me a playful wink.

I shrugged my shoulders and lifted one corner of my mouth upward.

"What's wrong?" he suddenly questioned, obviously noticing my limited answers.

"Nothing, just tired."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm okay."

Miles's eyebrows rose quickly upward when I replied with that.

"Are you okay or are you fine?" he prodded further. His eyebrows were knit in concern.

I snorted softly at that. Did he actually know the difference? I had made sure not to answer with fine for this reason, but I didn't think he would catch on to the underlying meaning.

"I'm okay, I promise," I giggled.

"I know your girl differences," he countered, pointing a finger at me.

"It's good that I'm okay and not fine then, huh?" I poked fun at him, pointing back.

He only nodded his head in reply. His eyes still suspicious of my answer.

There was no way in hell that I could muster up whatever courage I did have to ask him what he wanted in this relationship thing we were in now. It had magically disappeared after I had eavesdropped on his conversation with Jackson.

Miles's eyebrows were still furrowed as he stared at me. He knew something was up. The good and bad part of living together for a long time was being able to pick up on their mood very easily. Unfortunately, this was a bad thing at the moment.

Not wanting to alarm him any more, I dragged my feet over to the bed and pulled myself up. I ended up basically on top of him with my head resting on his chest.

He hesitated before he curled his arms around my torso and held me to him. My arms were holding lightly to his sides, tracing patterns into his shirt.

There was very few things that I liked more than just cuddling in silence with Miles. A comfortable quiet always settled over us, and I relaxed easily into his body. I didn't want this to end, but deep down there was a part of me that knew this couldn't last forever.

I can't. I don't...

You're just going to end up hurting yourself and her.

The bits of their conversation echoed through my head.

He can't what? I rolled it over and over in my mind.

He's going to hurt himself and me if he doesn't tell me. Why was Jackson so adamant about that?

He doesn't want to...

I stiffened when I realized what it was.

He doesn't want to hurt my feelings. This was most definitely just a summer fling for him. A little under-the-table, secret relationship.

He was just going to hurt himself and me even more if he didn't just tell me what this was it.

My mood only sank farther in to the deep hole it was already half way in.

"Relax, Princess. You're tense," he said softly.

I only bit my lip to keep myself from letting out the whimper building up. This was going to end soon, but I realized that feelings had genuinely been built up in me for him.

This summer was coming to a close, and I was far from ready to let this be done. Now it was just going to slip right through my fingers.

...

I didn't want to get hurt. It was just like Jackson had said. Whatever Miles was going to tell me, still hadn't been said, and it was scaring the living crap out of me.

The best way I could stop the hurt I knew was coming was to delay it. It was a pathetic way of dealing with it, but it was the only thing I could think of. I dreaded being alone with Miles now because he could easily drop the bomb on me.

The one that would blow up my heart.

I avoided being with him alone at all costs. Dragging one of the other guys where ever I went became a habit. Even when we did end up alone, I did something to get out of it. Pulling excuses of having to go somewhere out of thin air. I was avoiding him like the plague.

However, I missed everything about Miles. In my avoidance of him, I wasn't getting any of my usual attention from him. The kisses, the touches, the cuddling. I craved it, but I had to physically and mentally detach myself from him.

The most difficult times to avoid him were right before bed and getting up in the morning. There was no way to escape it.

I sat in my bed with a book gripped between my hands. Miles hadn't come back yet, which was beneficial for the fact that I didn't have to talk to him, but I was on edge of when he was going to come in.

I repeatedly glanced at the door, and jumped whenever there were foot steps in the hall, or the dorm squeaked. It was already 10:30, and we had practice at 8:00. Miles wasn't one to stay up the night before an early practice or game.

My thoughts were scattered, and my mind was barely able to comprehend what was happening in my novel.

The door knob clicked and turned a few minutes later, and I shoved the book in front of my face. I nibbled on my bottom lip as the door closed and footsteps made their way to the other bed. I relaxed the slightest when I heard the other bed dip and he hadn't said anything yet.

It was silent between us for a solid three minutes before Miles opened his mouth.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked suddenly. His face was scrunched and his eyes cut into me, drilling a hole into the side of my head.

I swallowed and with just that look I saw in my peripheral, I almost collapsed into a weeping mess. It was killing me that I couldn't launch myself at him and lay next to him for hours on end.

Instead, I put on a passive face and answered nonchalantly. "No." It was a deadpan. Another round of silence.

"We haven't really spent anytime together in the past fews days."

My mind was screaming at me to tell him I know and I miss everything about him. I had barely said a word to him in the previous days.

"We're on the same team, aren't we?" I was being incredibly rude, and I wanted to slap myself because of the amount of lies spewing out of my mouth at the moment.

Miles's face fell at my reply. What was I doing to him? I knew I was hurting myself to avoid the hundred times more pain that he would deliver me. It was pathetic however. Me trying to protect my pride. Wasn't this a relief for him though? I was doing the hard job for him, right? It has to be easier for me to break my own heart.

"What is up with you?" he asked. There was an obvious edge to his question. He was the one getting angry at me for making his job easier. What a concept.

"Nothing," I spit out. My book was still raised to eye level and covering my face.

"There's obviously something wrong."

"Obviously," I drawled out the word. "Because you know me so well."

Miles's faced shifted into pure irritation with my responses.

"What the hell crawled up your ass?" he snapped.

"As I said before, nothing," I replied. My tone on the verge of shouting. "Why don't you mind your own damn business?"

I was pissed, but I could feel the prick of tears behind my eyes. The floodgates were so close to just opening up and letting the water stream down my face. I blinked back some of them before I blew the pathetic cover that I had put up.

"Look at me!" he finally roared after I hadn't answered him for several minutes.

I flinched at his tone, but nevertheless, I lowered the book and glanced at him.

His face was red and scowling at me. He only stared at me, never glancing away.

"What?" I attempted to ask angrily. Instead, my voice quivered and was weak.

"What's wrong?" he asked smoothly. His voice didn't raise, but the agitation was very present.

I could only shake my head in response. Nothing could summarize my thoughts at the moment. Even if I tried, the reply would come out choked and incoherent. A single traitor tear finally escaped my eyes and slid down to my chin. I brushed it away, hoping he hadn't seen.

Miles's face softened, and he stood up, making his way to my bed.

I froze, and my breath caught in my throat. If he got anywhere near me, I would be done. His gaze never left mine as he made his way over.

Miles reached his hand to my face, but I moved away to not let myself crumble under his touch.

The familiar wall that had been there at the beginning of summer was rapidly being built within me again. The wall had kept out the bullies, the sadness, and the rape. I was going right back to protecting myself from the outside, except for a few. It was what I was used to until I came here.

Miles and the guys had slowly but surely removed all the thick bricks and made themselves comfortable. I was having more fun this summer than I have in a while, but with more happiness comes the more chance of hurt. My happiness has seemed to dry up and the pain was catching up to me.

"Don't touch me," I whispered, hating every word that escaped my lips.

Hurt flashed through Miles's eyes before they became blank. His face became stony. No emotion was shown in his face as he backed up.

I wouldn't have been scared out of my mind if Miles had become angry or sad or something. He did the exact opposite though. Not an ounce of emotion played across his face after the flash of hurt.

My heart leaped into my throat as Miles grabbed his pillow from the bed and shoved his phone into the pocket of his basketball shorts. Without looking my way, he walked to the door.

"Where are you going?" I finally croaked when his hand touched the door knob.

He mirrored my own previous expression and only shook his head before pulling the door open.

"Miles," I whimpered when he stepped out the door and closed it softly behind him.

The tears finally leaked out of my eyes into small rivers that coursed over my cheeks. A sob erupted from my throat. I couldn't help it and was only followed by smaller ones. My hands shook violently as I dropped my head into them; my legs curled under me.

What have I done?

I had just pushed away one of the best people in my life at the moment. There was no turning back from what happened.

To be quite honest, I was never one to cry over a boy. I would be the one that would be picking up tubs of ice cream for Ellie or Alyssa. They were the weepy ones when it came to boys and I was the shoulder to cry on and the one to suggest we egg his house.

Now I was the one crying my eyes out, but in the middle of New York without either of my best friends, mom, or a tub of ice cream.

I considered calling one of them, but I knew that would only result with one of them speeding up here and dragging me home.

It was past 10 o'clock, so I pushed myself under the covers, still crying pretty hysterically. The light was switched off, and my pillow pet found.