"It was fake," Jax said softly.

"Oh," I murmured quietly.

"Yeah," Jax shook his head and chuckled slightly, "you know, I think-deep down- I already knew that. We saw- we saw the body. But there was a small part of me that prayed he was still alive."

I nodded, feeling a lump in my throat, "I know."

My brothers were all silent, like they knew this moment was not to be interrupted.

The journey continued in silence.

X

When we reached home, I got out of the car and turned to my family, "I'm gonna take a walk. Clear my head."

My brothers nodded and told me to stay safe and not get kidnapped.

I walked out of the property line and went to a large field. I sat in the centre and raised my head to the heavens and screamed. Hot tears blurred my vision, but I didn't care. I don't even know why I was crying. I knew there was only a tiny chance Alex was alive.

Over the years I'd experienced many emotions. Sadness. Anger. Pain. Grief.

Hope was the cruelest of them all.

"Are you okay?"

I whipped around and saw Cole standing behind me. I furiously wiped my tears away, "just peachy, thanks."

Cole frowned, "then why were you crying?"

"I was being sarcastic," I sighed, "what do you want?"

Cole came and sat next to me, looking up at the sky, "I saw you were crying and came to see if you were okay."

I smiled weakly at him, "thanks. I'm not having the best of day right now."

"Wanna talk about it?" Cole had a genuine look on his face. I decided to throw caution to the wind and tell him some things.

"I had a best friend when I was six. He was like my big brother. When I was eleven, he got diagnosed with lung cancer and died when I was twelve. Recently, some guy showed me a picture of that boy and told me he was alive. However, it turns out he wasn't," I said.

Cole exhaled sharply, "wow."

I let out an airy laugh, "yeah. I don't even know why I'm crying. Guess I was just hoping."

"Hope is cruel," Cole said, "trust me, I know."

I looked at him curiously, but didn't pry into it, "I'm Iris, by the way," I said.

"Oh I know," Cole laughed quietly, "you're the girl who embarrassed me and James a while back."

"Sorry about that," I winced, remembering the incident.

"It's cool," Cole waved his hand dismissively, "it was actually quite refreshing meeting someone who didn't cower away in fear."

I hummed in agreement and we sat in comfortable silence. I checked the time and stood up, dusting myself off, "well, I better get back before my family launch a nationwide manhunt for me."

Cole stood up and laughed. He extended his arm and shook my hand, "nice talking with you, Iris."

"You too, Cole," I smiled back, "see you around." I turned and walked away.

X

When I reached home, I headed to the living room. My family breathed a sigh of relief when they saw me.

"How are you feeling?" Jax asked.

"Better. You?" I replied.

"Same here," he sighed and rubbed his eyes, "shall we go to Ornamand Hospital?"

"Maybe tomorrow," I said, "not feeling up to it right now. You can go if you want, though."

Jax shook his head, "it's been a while since I went back. I don't want to go back without you. Plus, the thought of facing Martha alone terrifies me."

I laughed slightly, "don't worry, she won't harm you... probably," I turned to my family, "do you guys want to come?"

"This sounds like something you both need to do on your own," Oscar said, "we'll stay here and wait for you."

I nodded, internally grateful that Oscar said that, "well, I'm gonna finish my homework."

"I'll help," Jax said and we went to my room.

X

By 'help' Jax meant that he would flop on my bed and irritate me while I did the work. He acted like he was 8 rather than 18.

"Rainbow," he whined, "how much longer? I'm dying of boredom!"

"It's been five minutes," I deadpanned, trying to find the value of 'x', "you'll live."

"No! I won't!" Jax gasped dramatically and began shaking, "tell the world my story!" He cried and went still.

"Idiot," I said fondly, looking down at Jax.

"Am not!" Jax sat upright and pouted before sighing dejectedly and lying back down, "how was your day?"

I put the pencil down and swivelled in my chair. There was no point in trying to get the work done right now, "Why?"

Jax shrugged, "I want to know what's happening in the life of my non-biological sister. Is that a crime?"

I told him about my day, including my friends weird reactions at lunch. Jax's reaction was raising his eyebrow at me and saying, "for someone so smart, you can be quite stupid at times."

"What do you mean?" I asked, but Jax just shrugged and adopted an air of someone who knew something I didn't. I narrowed my eyes, but decided to drop it. After seven years of friendship, I realised it was better to question Jax when he was least expecting it.

I recounted my chat with Cole and Jax squinted suspiciously, "I don't like him," he announced, "and I'd advise you to stay away from him," typical Jax. He would 'advise' me and when I didn't listen you him, something bad usually happened and he gets to say 'I told you so'.

"I'm a big girl now, Jax," I rolled my eyes, "I can take care of myself."

"To me you'll always be that seven year old girl who spilled orange juice on me the first time we met," Jax grinned.

"It was an accident!" I groaned, "plus, you were in the way."

"Agree to disagree," Jax said nonchalantly, "now hurry up and finish your work."

"That's what I was doing!" I exclaimed, "before you distracted me."

"Then you shouldn't have let yourself be distracted," Jax said, smirking at me.

"You know what? I'm not gonna talk to you," I huffed and turned around to finish my homework while Jax laughed behind me.