'just as long as my blood keeps rushing, i don't care about the repercussions.'

(repercussions - bea miller)

-

A.

I couldn't bring myself to hum along with the lyrics, only absorb them as I lay back on my comforter, my sweater sleeves providing some kind of entertainment. I clicked my tongue quietly as the record ended, standing up to lift the needle. I did so, replacing the disc with another, sending a glance out of the window at the pouring rain. Another beam of lightening struck the ground nearby, as thunder continued to sound, and the first note played from the record. I pulled my hair from the ponytail, letting the curls fall over my shoulders as I shuffled into my window seat. I brought my knees to my chest, tugging on my leggings at the ankles, as I watched the rain carefully, finding great fascination in the downpour.

I wondered if Harry was doing the same right now, or if he was even thinking about me at all. I was pretty sure I'd blown it for good with how stupid I'd acted, especially in telling him I was with Luke - but I certainly hoped I hadn't. Now more than anything, I hoped Harry didn't hate me, and somehow still wanted me. Though unlikely, it was that I know longed for.

I knew my parents would always be an obstacle for us to face, and though I'd like to think I was beyond the point of longing for their approval, but as my parents - there would always be the part of me who wanted them to approve of who I was with and the choices I made - but I could no longer let that define a thing - I wanted them to accept Harry and the fact that I loved him, and I wanted them to give Celia her job back, or to at least offer it.

I stood up hastily, heading towards the door of my room and swinging open without missing a beat, heading down the stairs into the living room where I knew my parents would be sitting before they went to sleep. It was near eleven, and as expected, they sat in their typical chairs with a drink in hand as they talked about some boring topics.

"Mother," I spoke as soon as I entered the room, cutting off whatever conversation they'd been having as she shot me a glare.

"Anastasia, your father and I were having a conversation-"

"This is important," I argued, nervously fiddling with the hem of my sweater, "I need you two to listen to me - please."

"What is it, sweetheart?" my dad butted in, silencing my mother as I shot him a grateful smile.

I chewed on my lip for a moment, shifting from foot to foot, before just blurting out, "I love Harry."

My dad's face fell, and my mother's gaze hardened as the words left my mouth - but they stayed quiet.

"I know, you thought it would stop, since so many months have passed - but I love him. You sent him away, as well as Celia - and all that did was fuel it. I love him so, so much, and I know you think I don't, and I know you think we're just messing around, but you don't know him, and you don't know us. He is so, so incredible, and yes - he's made his mistakes, but he would never, ever purposely hurt me. Harry has treated me better than anybody else has, and he has loved me like nobody else has. I've never been as happy as I was when I was with him, and I don't need you to fully support it, I just need you to understand it. I need you to know that I won't get past it, I won't be happy again, unless I'm with him. I know you disapprove of him, but you shouldn't because it shouldn't matter how much money he has, what his background is, or what he's gone through - what matters is who he is, and who he is to me," I exhaled, having ranted for several minutes now as they both stared at me in shock, "and he loves me. He really, truly loves me, and I just want you to accept that."

The room fell silent as my parents glanced at each other in pure shock, as my mother stayed quiet, and my dad cleared his throat.

"He's in town then, I presume?" he asked, and I nodded, "then you best be getting to see him, hm?" My jaw dropped, his answer the furthest from what I'd expected, but I didn't stay to argue, as I bolted from the living room, and straight out of the front door - the freezing rain mixed with the warm summer air hitting me within seconds, and I was immediately soaked. I stepped onto the porch, glancing around as the rain continued to pour and the thunder continued to sound, before quickly storming down the steps, and charging down the street. The water from the puddles my feet landed in splashed up at my legs, and I could feel myself soaked even further by the second, but I didn't care as I continued down the street, my hair beginning to stick to my face with water.

I could see it from where I was, just about making out the silhouette as I continued towards it, not stopping for a second as I ran with everything I had. The frame came clearer into view, and I couldn't slow down for a second, bolting towards it as my face fell and I reached it - he wasn't here. I bit my lip, glancing around - desperate for him to suddenly appear - for his unruly curls and tattered boots to come into view as they crunched against the gravel. I needed him to be here, but he wasn't.

I took a step towards the swing, the surface soaked as raindrops continued to pound against it and bounce off the edges, and I exhaled deeply, running a hand through my soaking hair in conclusion that he wasn't here. I was about to curse myself for not finding him sooner, and for being wistful enough to believe he'd be here, before I heard the snap of a twig behind me, and the drag of a boot on the concrete.

His unmistakable low rasp sounded from behind me, "It's raining, baby."

And as I spun around to face the sound, I could now face him properly - his curls as soaked as mine and unruly as he turned to meet my eyes, only metres between us now. Our eyes locked, and his gaze softened as it used to when he saw me and he pulled his hands from the pockets of his coat, holding them out for me as I hurried into them.

"Ana Grace," he murmured as I met the heat of his hands on my waist, igniting the fire within the pit of my stomach I'd missed so much as he held me.

"Harry," was all I breathed in response as my arms wound around his neck and I brought his lips to mine, greeted with a sensation and a taste I'd missed more than anything. His lips were chapped, yet still held the familiar softness they always did, as I tugged him closer to me by his own sweater, our lips moulding together in the sweetest way possible, his kiss captivating me in the way it always had, every single sense in my body awakening all at once, his kiss so maddening and possessive but it came with such ease and normalcy - it was right, when he touched me, kissed me, and held me.

I felt something hot and salty touch my lips, and I quickly realised he was crying - he was sobbing, as our kiss broke and I tilted my head up to look at him, his face already tear-stained as the rain pounded down around us.

"Hey," I murmured, bringing his face down to me to wipe his tears away with my thumbs, "I know, I know," I bit back my own tears, the image of Harry completely soaked only inches away from me as his lips trembled, and he looked so broken, so fragile proving too much.

"I love you so much, Ana," his voice shook as he spoke, his arms tightening around my waist as he pulled me into a hug, my forehead pressed to his shoulder as he kissed the side of my head, before I buried my head in his neck, the warmth sheltering me from the merciless rain as he held me tightly, and I felt my own hot tears stream down my cheeks.

"I love you," I returned, squeezing him tightly in response as I inhaled the smell of smoke and mint he always possessed, "I'm so, so in love with you, Harry Styles."

"I love you, Ana," he repeated, mumbling weakly, as I leant back to look at him, "you could never, ever understand how much I love you."

I didn't respond as I held myself close to him, simply content with his presence as everything else around us became unknown - the rain was the only thing to be heard as we held each other, neither of us daring to move as his hand met my cheek, his thumb gently caressing the surface as I leant into his touch, desperate not to lose the heat and comfort I'd yearned to feel again for months since he left.

"Ana Grace," he whispered, as yet another rumble of thunder sounded through the sky, and I couldn't stop a smile from tugging at my lips as he spoke, "I swear to you: I'll never, ever let you go again."