The contusion around Haseenah's right eye had turned purple but the bruise on her forehead was fresh and it stung despite it had stop bleeding. Her appearance was different. The scars gave her face a deformity it never got used to but it seemed Ahmed loved to see her face that way. Haseenah looked down at the set of brush and array of makeup items on her dresser. She had to cover her scar up with makeup like she had always done. She had to cover her bruises, cover her sorrow with fake smiles, and cover her agony with false joy. She picked up the first brush and proceeded to draw her brows.

She looked at the luxury she sat in. There was money. Anyone would walk in here and smell the money. They had everything in their comfort zone. There was no need to ask twice before Ahmad gave her anything. She had seen women envy her whenever she was in public with Ahmad. They had said he loved her. He never takes his eyes from her but it was not like that. They never saw the real thing. He was always searching for fault in what she does so that he could hit her. And he always saw that fault.

"They have arrived" She heard his voice which made her look at him. "Be your best" His eyes met her. She saw the spite in it before he hissed and walked out.

-----

Shawn had called it a breakup but she had not seen it as one. They were just having a fling so he had no right to tell her who to twerk for and who to dance with. Lola snorted. What had the idiot thought? That they were dating? She snorted again. He was just one of those men she used and dumped like a tissue paper. She was just using him to while away time. Gosh! She rolled her eyes mentally. He had been so furious and angry at her. He considered her dancing amidst drunk young adult with a man immorality. Who was he to tell her what morality was? He had thought himself high. He had thought they were really dating. What a fool he was? She stiffened a wicked laugh.

"Lola!" A voice barked, cutting through her train of thoughts.

Lola lifted her eyelids to stare at the ceramic white wall of her bathroom. "What is it this time, mommy?" She requested in a voice that was low and sounded so tired as if she was not ready for whatever trouble her mother was coming with.

"Don't use that tone on me!" Cynthia snapped halting next to the hot tub.

The bathroom was large, all white from the bathtub to the sink, walls and floor. It had a relaxing ambiance. Candles were lit giving it a warm glow and bowls of roses were kept on the vanity, perfuming the expanse. Lola laid in warm water, the cosy water giving her body a relaxation she craved for. The lady who sat at the edge of the tub, worked professional fingers against Lola's shoulder. It was home service of some spa in Island.

"I am busy at the moment" She sighed as the lady hand massaged a stiffened muscle.

"If I knock your head, you will drown in that water! Where were you last night?"

"At a birthday party the commissioner of health's daughter threw. You know Sandra Komolu? It was her birthday"

"When your grandfather is lying on the hospital bed"

"That does not mean I should not have fun" She lifted cool eyes to gaze at her mother. Cynthia's brows were knitted together with disapproval of what was going on. Her eyes spat brown fire, turning lighter.

"Will you stop been lackadaisical about what I am talking about?"

Lola rolled her eyes. "Mummy, I am relaxing. I need to get my skin pretty and glowing before leaving for a party. Today is Saturday and it's meant for party"

"You!" Cynthia shouted at the beautician. The young lady jolted at the unexpected harsh tone. "Leave what you are doing and get out!" Lola blew air from her lips then sank deeper into the water. "You kids won't drive me crazy! Last night, you were at a party and came back this morning. Same thing goes to Miracle. He spent the night at some lady's house and Sarah, only God knows where she is since yesterday evening and Samson, telling me he's recording a song at some stupid studio! What are you all so irresponsible?"

"Why are you now venting your anger at me? I am not the only one who offended you. Call the rest and shout at them"

"Watch your tongue young woman! I am your mother!"

Lola's shoulders slacked. "Sorry. What do you want me to do? I have a wedding party. I am sure you saw the dress before coming in. The makeup artist and hairstylist will be here anytime from now. I am not free to see grandfather today"

"He is your grandfather and he needs you all to be there. Do you want that good for nothing grandmother of yours to think of you as irresponsible? That old hag will always have a reason to taunt me and compare me to that riff-raff called Pelumi"

"So?" Lola gave a careless shrug.

Cynthia's eyes flamed. "What?"

"So? What if she does that? You should not take grandmother's words to heart. By the way I am angry at her at the moment. Same goes to granddad"

"He has woken up"

"What?" Lola sat up in the water.

"Your grandfather has woken up. You need to go and see him" She repeated with a matter of fact tone.

"I have no time"

"Stop being a brat!"

"You brought me up"

"I will smack your face" Cynthia lifted a hand then dropped it.

"Sorry. Come on mummy" Lola whined.

"You are all not helping matters"

"We are sorry"

"Well, it does not change anything. I just want you all at the hospital" She said in a tone that meant what she said was final then turned on her heels and left the bathroom.

-----

Doctor Benjamin Sansa was a patient man. It was what his work needed him to be. He does not need to pretend to be patient because he had the trait. His cool eyes stared at his patient seated on the cushion opposite him. Lola had her bare feet on the cushion. Her legs were pulled to her chest. Music floated from the speaker of her phone in low volume.

"Are there any changes?" he broke the comfortable silence that had lingered for long.

"Little" Lola replied scrolling through her instagram page. "I just get angry a bit. I still feel the tightening in my chest and the tingling"

"You need to avoid situations that would cause such reaction"

"I do" a little smile worked its way across her face. "I try to but many things can't be avoided" she raised her eyes from the phone to look at him. "I am pained. Too much is happening for me to turn a blind eye to. I try to ignore them but I just can't"

"Do you mind telling me?"

"I get mad when they come around. The fact that woman had made my mother cry made me resent her so much. I wondered why he cheated. Mummy might not have been perfect but she does not deserve what he gave her. That woman thinks she has a place in the Kola-Daisi home and because my grandmother got her back, it gives her power"

"Who is she?"

"My father's mistress" she dropped her gaze to her lap. "A woman who turned out to be cousin to a distant friend of mine. You know something doc" she looked at him again. "The world is a small place. You do not know where you will meet people after you depart away from them. There is also a guy. I don't know but something about him feels so different from the men I had met"

"Name?"

"Joshua. My grandparents want me to be with him. They are not talking about courting him. They want us to get married" she laughed throwing her head. "Can you believe that?" she sat well, dropping her legs to the floor. Her feet flinched to how cold the floor was beneath her feet. "I barely know anything about him. Do you know why I despise being with a man?"

"You never told me"

"Because I hate marriage. I hate commitment. I hate anything that has to do with being with someone and when I decided to give it all to one person, he ruined it"

"That's the past"

"That's what they all say but to me it's not!" She threw her hands, getting to her feet. "No one understand what I feel" She started to pace the room, feeling restless. "They do not know what I had to go through and what I am still going through. They are just greedy. They just think about themselves" She barked. "My grandmother is worse. She's been selfish! Marry him because you will find solace in him. Bullshit!" She snorted, throwing her head high. "Like it's that easy" her trembling hand went through her hair. "I want this to end" her voice shook.

"You have to calm down Lola" Benjamin's eyes watched her. He studied her, calculated her like she was mathematics.

"I tried to a number of times" she tingled, her chest constricted. Suddenly, she felt clammy. "But those people just get me so angry that I can't control that urge" she paced the room, her fingers twiddling together.

"Try not to let your thinking bite deep into you. Breathe in. Breathe out. If it does not work, remember our lessons from you anger management therapy"

Even though her mind was frenzy, Lola heard him and understood him. "You know I stopped one time in California but I ended up sending that girl to a place of no return" she bent down. Her thoughts weighed her down.

"You allow your thoughts weaken you Lola. They get into you making you scared. About that man?"

"Joshua said he won't give up on me. For once" she rocked back and forth. "It felt nice to hear those words from someone but at the same time they are the worse words to listen to. One minute I want a man's love and affection then the next, I do not give a damn if I do not get it" she laughed at how miserable she felt. "Aren't I pathetic doctor? So much is happening to me"

"You are not pathetic. You are just a normal human being. We all yearn for love"

"But I do not want it. I know the more I run away from it, from commitment, from anything that has to do with getting involve with someone, the more they come closer"

"How about your nightmares?"

"They hardly come but I had one last night. He was there" she got up again to pace the large office. "He was there like always. This time it felt so real. Everytime I tried to push him away, he was always there. He won't leave" She fiddled with her fingers. "You know why doctor?" she halted and look at Benjamin's eyes. She showed him her fear, her insecurities. She allowed him to see deep into her heart. Lola swallowed before speaking. "He will come back" her voice was full of dread.

"You believe that?" Benjamin raised an eyebrow. Lola sat down.

"Because I know he will. He is not the type to let things go that easy" she trembled at the thought of someone killing her. "He won't until he gets back his revenge. He will come back for me" she squeaked, fear absorbing every part of her. Tears rushed into her eyes.

"You have to think positive. You think negative a lot of times"

"That's because that what the world is full of. Negativity!" she shot up then exhaled very hard and deep. She threw her head back, raked her hand through it then bit her lips. "This morning, I reconsidered going out with Joshua. I thought I should really give him a chance since it is what everyone want. They pressurize me. The pressure is getting too much. It is everywhere. My siblings, my grandparents, cousins, uncles, aunts" she sat down, her hands folded on her laps. "Can you believe this morning, Aunty Dammy called to tell me she has a date for me. He is handsome. He is her friend's son. He is this. He is that" she gestured her hand in her aunt's dramatic way. "Please" she huffed with a roll of her eyes. "There are times I think I might go insane from too much thinking"

"That's because your thoughts are negative"

"Then what will I do?"

"What I said. Start thinking positively"