《Want To Be Loved (Himiko Toga x Female Reader Story)》Recovery

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I wake up as Toga gets up to leave.

"I'll be right back sweetheart."

I stay silent.

I turn around hurting my arms again, "oh fuck..." I say under my breath.

Fucking stupid.

I sigh as I try to go back to sleep. Later on Toga wakes me up.

"Hey time to eat." She shows me a plate of pancakes that are slightly burned, "um...I hope you don't mind it being burned."

"I'm not hungry..."

"Oh." She looks at the plate and puts it on the side table, "Then what would you like to do?"

"Nothing."

"What about going to the graveyard again?"

"No..."

She looks hesitant, "You should really eat something."

"Can you just go? I'm too tired."

"Fine." She leaves the plate and goes.

I sit up as I look to the plate.

She said she didn't know how to cook. This must have been a lot of trouble for her to make. I lay my head back. And I was so fucking ungrateful.

There's a knock on the door but I ignore it. I grab the plate as Buba comes in.

"I thought you told Toga you weren't hungry..."

"I'm not but I've disappointed her enough." I look up at him, "Why the hell are you here?"

"I wanted to talk to you."

"Yea no shit. I mean about what?"

He slowly gets closer, "I just wanted to say...you mean a lot to Toga and I know I slip up at times and don't really hide-"

"The fact you don't really like me? Don't worry I don't like myself either" I interrupt him.

"Um...yea but I'm working on it because you make her happy."

I look at him, "Really? Even after I've yelled at her? Even when I'm like this?"

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"Yes," He laughs trying to lighten the mood, "I get what you're going through." He sits on the edge of the bed, "I get like this too. I know its a fucking terrible feeling. You feel numb one day and the next you hate on yourself for everything you do right?" I nod to him. "And you find yourself getting irritated by everyone and everything?" I nod to him again. "See I understand. Which means you're probably trying to push Toga away right? You think its better if she's gone then for her to 'deal' with you like this?"

Shocked by what he said I agree with him, "Yea..."

"Look she isn't going anywhere. She knows this stuff isn't as glamorous as media makes it seem. She knows this is hard and takes time which is why she will wait for you to get better no matter how long so just don't push her away and if you don't want to do something right now that's okay don't beat yourself up for it."

I don't say anything.

Ok. He's known Toga longer. Which means he knows better.

Buba comes out of y/n's room, "You were listening?" He smiles.

I just give him a hug, "Thank you for talking to her."

"No problem. I'm here for both of you."

We pull away from each other and I give him a smile. He leaves as I go back in y/n's room.

"You're up?" I say surprised by seeing y/n up from bed.

"Yea."

"So you feel better?"

"No, but being in bed isn't going to help," She looks at me, "Normally I'd just listen to music and wish death upon everyone but then again that's when I live with my mom. Not that I stopped hating people...I just don't hate everyone in the world."

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"Oh how sweet!" I place a kiss on her cheek.

I might not be fully mentally well but I'm done feeling sorry for myself.

"Let's go get breakfast."

"Are you sure darling?"

I nod my head to her, "But I should go back to the dorms to change."

She smiles, "Okay."

We go back to the dorms and enter through the sliding door. I get some clothes to wear and Toga helps me into them to avoid opening my wounds on my arms.

"What shoes do you want?"

"The black boots."

Toga stays silent, "Uh...okay sweetie you have a lot of black boots can you be more specific?" She asks so sweetly.

"Which ever ones you want."

She helps me zip up the boots and I grab my favorite t-shirt to put on.

"Are you okay showing them?" Toga points to the bandages covering the cuts.

"Yea I've done it in middle school I can do it now...not that it made it easier but I'm not wearing something I don't want to. It's already hot outside with me wearing black."

We agree to meet each other outside the school so I walk out of my room.

"Oh hey y/n...we haven't seen you since...well since you came home and..." Kirishima says as I come face to face to him outside my door. He doesn't want to mention the night I saw mother.

"Yea I know." I walk out to see the others together.

I go on my way to the front door until they stop me.

"Y/n did you...?" Asui points to the bandages and they all stare.

"Why the fuck do you all care? Mind your business." I walk out the dorms and leave campus.

Finally I get to meet up with Toga.

"So where are we going?" She asks.

"(fav place to eat)"

"Alright then!"

We go start to walk there trying to avoid from Toga getting caught by the heros in the street.

All these damn heroes are just fucking irritating me. They can't even notice a wanted villain right in front of them.

I sigh.

"What's wrong darling?"

"Nothing."

"C'mon tell me."

"Fine. It's all these damn heroes here. They're existence makes me mad."

"Then let's take away their existence."

I look to her, "Really?"

"Yea just tell me which one and I'll stab them for you!" She smiles at me. Her eyes filled with joy.

(A/n: This story was supposed to be out Christmas Eve but I went to a place with no internet or wifi so I'm Soo sorry I'll try to post the other chapters more often)

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