"You're getting so good," I praise with a proud smile. Cole managed to make it through the entire song without any mistakes. The tempo was a bit off, and he paused a couple times, but it was still impressive nonetheless for only two weeks of practice. "Posture though," I teasingly scold him, lightly touching his lower back to adjust him.

Even though it was an absolutely ridiculous purchase, having the piano here has been nice. Cole comes over after class for practice, and we get to hang out together afterwards. I've learned that he has terrible taste in movies. Trashy comedies and action movies full of explosions. We're quite divided over foods as well. Can you believe he likes pineapple on his pizza?

As much as I love mom and Mr. Carter, it's been nice having Cole to spend time with. I was always so busy I didn't get a chance to really make friends my own age while growing up.

Is Cole just a friend? People are always talking about looking for signs to gauge someone's interest. Unfortunately, I have no idea what those signs are. Things like that have always been completely irrelevant to me. I've never had free time for dating and never really gained any intuition or instincts for these kinds of things.

I think Cole likes me, as a friend at least.

That's something, right?

"Hey what's this?" Cole picks up some sheet music I left on top of the piano. The top of the first page is smudged and scratched from all of the writing and erasing I did, but you can still clearly make out the title of the piece.

Cole

I feel heat rush to my face and I smile shyly. "It's a piece I've been working on. You're my muse."

I've poured hours into this song. Late, late nights and early, early mornings. A lot of it is in pianissimo, much more than I was originally intending. I played quietly to avoid disturbing Mr. Carter while he was sleeping, but I actually ended up liking how that sounded. I was inspired by Cole's personality; it's all in major keys, reflecting his cheerful and bright personality. I suppose I subconsciously thought about how I felt towards him as I wrote, and the melody ended up being sweet and gentle.

I realized after finishing that this was my only bright and happy sounding piece so far. All of my other pieces have been in minor keys. Aggressive for the most part, either fortissimo or forte. I try not to focus too hard or deliberately when writing. Rather, I let the music come to me as I play and experiment. What does this say about what's going on in my subconscious? I'd rather not think about it.

"Oh wow, thank you Mel." His eyes are bright and shiny as he smiles at me. "What an honour. Can I hear it?"

I fidget with my fingers nervously. "Well... it's not exactly ready," I mumble.

I was never intending to share it. It was just supposed to be a personal passion project. A piece of work that actually made me happy for once.

Before he can protest, Mr. Carter peeks in the living room. His cheeks are pink from the cold and his coat is still a little damp from the snow. "I got everything on your grocery list, Ms. Aria. I'll be in my room, let me know if you need anything."

"Thanks Mr. Carter." I grin excitedly.

Cole raises an eyebrow. "What are you making?"

"Gingerbread cookies!" I announce gleefully, getting up from the bench. "I spent most of last December on a tour bus and didn't get to do any Christmas baking."

He shuts the piano lid and stands up. "That's fun. I'm not much of a baker myself."

"I can show you. Do you want to help?" I give him my best puppy dog eyes.

"Sure, why not."

I happily grab his wrist and practically drag him towards the kitchen. Mr. Carter's laid out all the ingredients neatly on the counter. Flour, sugar, butter, eggs, spices, and a bunch of decorating supplies. I roll up the sleeves of my sweater in preparation.

"What's that by the way?" Cole points to my forearm. "The tattoo?"

I turn my arm to him, showing the delicate, wispy black outlines of a flower. "It's a violet, also my middle name," I explain. "Alyssa's named after the alyssum flower."

He looks confused but nods anyway.

"Our dads were brothers. They thought it'd be sweet for both of us to be named after flowers, especially since we were born days apart." I still think it would've been sweet, but a middle name is better than nothing I suppose. "My mom convinced him to name me Melody instead."

I wanted to start going by Violet for the longest time after dad died. It felt like one of the few things I had that still kept me connected to him, but it never worked out.

"So you got yourself inked out of spite?" he chuckles.

"It's in honour of him." I nudge him playfully. "Alyssa managed to fly to California for my birthday to join me and got a tattoo of an alyssum on her shoulder."

Mom was not happy when I got home and she saw, but she couldn't stop herself from smiling when I explained what it meant. Then she showed me a tattoo she had secretly gotten after dad died. On her shoulder, a simple I love you in dad's handwriting, taken from a note he left for her that night. I somehow had never noticed it.

It humanized her in a way. Reminded me that this fast paced, business savvy, and authoritative woman was the same woman who fell in love with my dad. She was still my mom.

I suddenly remember something. "You have one too right? I think I saw a hint of something on your arm before." Cole's sleeves are always just barely too long to expose the mystery tattoo on his arm.

Cole's face immediately turns red. "Yeah...I do... please don't make me show it to you."

"You can't expect me to not want to see it now," I say excitedly. "Please?" I take a step closer and look up at him, widening my eyes.

He chuckles sheepishly and rubs the back of his neck. "You've figured out my weakness, eh?"

I nod with a big grin. "It's only fair, you tried to charm me with your smile when we first met."

"Fair enough," he laughs. "Even when you're not purposely doing that, your eyes really are pretty."

I try not to blush and change the subject. "So, the tattoo?"

He grimaces and slowly folds up the sleeve of his flannel shirt. Along his forearm are some Chinese characters.

I furrow my brows. "What does that say?"

"I don't speak Chinese."

"What?" I raise a brow. "So you let them tattoo a random message on you?"

"No, uh," he sighs and closes his eyes. "It literally says, I don't speak Chinese."

I burst out laughing. "C-Cole," I wheeze, struggling to catch my breath, "Why?"

"It was frosh week, and I had just joined Kappa Sigma," he mumbles, leaning back against the counter. "A bunch of the other guys from the frat thought it'd be fun to get tattoos like this."

After I've wiped away my tears from laughing so hard, I give him a sympathetic smile and pat on the back. "It's alright, I think it's funny."

"Gee thanks." He rolls his eyes playfully.

He pauses for a moment and looks at me awkwardly. "Err, speaking of the frat, remember that formal Alyssa mentioned last weekend?"

"I think so." Alyssa tells me so many things that it's easy to lose track.

"Would you uh, want to come with me?" His tone is soft and he shifts his weight back and forth on his feet. "As my date? It's this Sunday."

I feel my stomach do a flip. As much as I've tried to be introspective, I can't seem to pinpoint my feelings for Cole. While most people spent their teenage years having fun and dating, I was a fifteen year old studying for a Master's degree in music. Did I miss out?

Regardless, all I know is that I really enjoy his company. He makes me happy, and I think I do the same for him.

Is that it though?

I like Cole, I really do...but I don't know how to talk to him about it. It terrified me when he brought it up the other day. The look on his face when I said no broke my heart, but I couldn't show that it was hurting me too. I've never felt this way about, well, anyone before. I'm worried I'll ruin things between us.

I ignore my thoughts and manage to put a smile onto my face. "That sounds fun, I'd love to."

He gives me a relieved smile. "Great, I'll text you the info later tonight."

"Perfect. Now, shall we get started?" I place my laptop on the counter and open up a recipe. "Oh, could you grab a hair tie from my room?" As much as I love my long hair, I'm incredibly overdue for a haircut. I'm not exactly in the mood to have to wash cookie dough out of my hair tonight. "Just go down the hall, turn left, up the stairs, two rights, through the balcony, then one more left."

He stares at me, dumbfounded. "You're kidding...right?"

"Yes," I chuckle. "I left one on top of the piano."

"Now that I can do," he says and heads outside.

I pull out my phone and open my Christmas playlist. Selecting shuffle, the first song that comes up is The Nutcracker Suite. I haven't played this song since I was eight. It was back in Maryland during the annual Christmas parade. I was plopped onto a float with some ballet dancers, a grand piano, and lots of speakers. The song still haunts me - I can't believe I played it on repeat for over two hours that day. What a way to spend Christmas.

I turn to my laptop and read the recipe. Quite simple and straightforward. Mix the wet things, mix the dry things, then mix everything and bake. Voila, cookies. I used to love making these with mom and dad when I was little. We've been too busy for the past couple of years though, mom would always just ask our personal chef to bake them if I wanted some. As if on cue, I get a facetime call from mom.

I answer. I can tell she's in her fancy office. The one with all my awards and achievements displayed for when she has meetings with people she considers "important." I hate going in there, it kind of creeps me out, seeing myself all over the room. She probably just finished a meeting, she's wearing makeup and one of her pantsuits.

"Hey Mom, what's up?"

"Hey Melody, I just wanted to see how your writing is going, since you haven't been answering my texts," she says, though there isn't any malice in her tone.

I realize I've barely looked at my phone at all recently. "Oh yeah sorry, I've been busy," I mumble, hoping she doesn't ask what I've been busy with. "It's going alright, I'm not ready to send anything yet though."

"Melody, you promised you would still work," she sighs, taking off her glasses and pinching the bridge of her nose.

It's been surprisingly easy and fun to assimilate into my temporary life here in Toronto, but that's all it is - temporary. Mom's reminder makes the reality of my real life come back, hitting me like a bus. The happy bubble I've been living in for the past month is about to burst, and I'm not ready for that.

"I know, I know." I nod, trying not to let my disappointment show. She wouldn't understand how I'm feeling, I'm certain she never will. Emotions? Feelings? Work and success always come first for her.

"I'll call you tomorrow and we can talk, ok? You'll be ready to send something by then, right?" She types something on her computer and writes something on a notepad - not even bothering to look at me. "I'll send you a to-do list to get you back on track."

I don't even have time to tell her how ridiculous that sounds to me before she continues.

"When are you coming back by the way? You said a month, right?" She frowns a bit, and I see her looking at something on her screen. "It was a month yesterday."

Despite already seeing her question coming, my heart skips a beat and I gulp. My chest feels heavy and my head feels light, as if all the air has suddenly been squeezed out of me. I grip onto the counter to steady myself. As much as I've been trying to ignore the thought, I know it's inevitable. I had been hoping mom wouldn't notice, but of course she did.

"Um...soon, Mom," I mumble, staring down at the keyboard. I don't want to know what kind of look she's giving me right now, even though I'm sure I know. Poorly hidden disapproval and impatience.

"Mel, you actually left three hair ties on the piano," Cole laughs as he comes in.

I gasp and I quickly turn my laptop towards the wall.

"Melody? Hello?" mom's voice calls.

"Oh god." I rest my elbows on the counter and bury my face in my hands. I let my heart calm down before taking a peek at Cole through my fingers. He has the nerve to look amused. I point to the corner of the kitchen. "Stay out of frame," I whisper. He nods and walks over. I slowly turn my laptop back towards me and give mom a sheepish grin.

It seems as if she's completely forgotten what we were talking about earlier. "Was that a boy?" she asks with a wide and excited smile. "Who is he? Are you two dating?"

"Mom," I groan.

"Aw I'm sorry honey, but this is exciting," mom gushes excitedly. "I've never seen you with a guy before! Maybe this break was a good idea after all. Who is he?"

I feel myself blushing and do my best to avoid looking at Cole's cheeky grin from the corner of my eye. "His name is Cole. We've been um, hanging out."

"Can I meet him?" she asks with a sly smile.

"No, I-" I begin.

"Hi there Mrs. Aria," Cole says happily, joining me in front of the laptop. He's so much taller than me that he needs to tilt the screen upwards so we're both in frame. "Cole Flynn, nice to meet you."

I feel my face turn red and I scowl, stepping on Cole's foot. He doesn't even flinch.

I try to gauge the analytical look on mom's face for any clues on her thoughts. She's trying to look serious but I can see the smile in her eyes. "Hi Cole. Nice to meet you too. How'd you two meet?"

"Well, I attended Mel's last concert and had a run-in with her there. Coincidentally, I go to U of M, and I saw her practicing. She's been showing me how to play piano," he explains politely.

Mom raises an eyebrow. "She has, has she? Is this why you haven't been working, Melody?"

"U-uh," I stutter before feeling Cole's hand lightly touch my back. I glance up at him and do my best not to roll my eyes as I see the familiar smug grin on Cole's face.

It's almost annoying how ready he is to immediately turn on the charm. He flashes her his signature smile. "I'm so grateful, your daughter is an incredible teacher and pianist. I'm sure she got her dedication and work ethic from you."

Mom easily falls for it. "That's sweet, thank you, Cole." Knowing her though, she definitely hasn't forgotten her original point. But why is it any of her business why I haven't been working? "So, do you two have feelings for each other?"

"Mom, stop," I groan.

Cole just chuckles and lightly drapes his arm around me. "Well Mrs. Aria," he turns to me and smiles. "All I know is that I care about Mel, and she makes me happy, really happy. Don't worry about official labels or anything like that."

I smile, but I can't ignore the feeling of guilt that washes over me.

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I want the two of them to just be together and happy 😭 (But where's the fun in that? 😉)

Thanks for reading! :)