"So, I heard you and Cole were on a date this morning." Even in the dim lighting coming from streetlamps and passing cars, I can see the giant grin on Alyssa's face.

"It wasn't a date." I frown at her. "How did you even know we were out together?"

"I'm a sorority president, I know people," she laughs. "The server was one of my sisters, we tell each other everything. She said she saw Cole with a quiet, blonde girl who seemed to have a bodyguard following her."

"You're already making me regret agreeing to this and we haven't even left the car yet." I'm still amazed she managed to convince Mr. Carter to let her bring me alone tonight.

She chuckles and shakes her head. "Regardless, it's really nice to see you like this, Mel. You know, finally unafraid to go out and socialize with people. I'm super proud." We stop at a red light and she turns towards me to give me a quick smile. I see the sympathy in her eyes though. "But yeah, growing up is hard, I'm sure even more so for you. You were pushed to be an adult so much earlier than everyone else."

I suppose things have been changing, although I wouldn't go as far as calling myself completely unafraid.

I've been told I dress, speak, and act much more maturely for my age for as long as I can remember. It was how I was raised ever since mom took over. I've been treated like an adult for years now, but on the inside, I'm still a scared and lost nineteen year old girl who doesn't feel like an adult whatsoever.

Alyssa glances over again and notices my expression. I don't even need to say anything for her to understand what I'm thinking. One of the many benefits of growing up practically attached at the hip. I see the look of realization slowly appear on her face and her tone softens. "But... you're not really one. You're still mentally and emotionally entering adulthood with the rest of us, huh."

I nod and fidget with my fingers as the sinking pit in my stomach grows deeper and deeper. "This isn't an ideal conversation for the night of a party," I awkwardly laugh and force a smile onto my face. This isn't an ideal conversation topic for me, ever. "Let's just keep things light."

Alyssa hesitates but gives me a small nod. "Yeah, ok. You can call me to talk whenever you need to, Mel. You know that, right?"

"Of course. Thanks Liss."

Despite her wild and effervescent personality, Alyssa can be incredibly kind and sweet. Fiercely protective and unafraid to get in someone's face, she's the one who'll do everything in her power to make sure the ones she cares about are ok. Even as we were beginning to drift apart, she would stay on the phone with me for hours when I was distraught about the craziness and stress that came with my life.

I adjust the neckline and hem of my uncomfortable dress - Alyssa's dress actually. It's short and tight and not my thing. It's been either formal dresses for performances and media appearances, or very casual clothes with no in between for most of my life. She somehow convinced me to let her choose my outfit and do my makeup for tonight. It reminded me of playing dress up with my mom's fancy clothes and makeup when we were little.

I take a peek at myself in the sun visor's mirror. Her makeup skills have definitely come a long way since we were kids though. I've seen the way she can make herself practically look like a completely different person. My only condition when I agreed was that I still had to look like myself.

"Do you mind?" I point towards the tablet on the dashboard that controls the music - along with many other things in her unnecessarily nice car. Being the youngest child, Alyssa's parents have always spoiled her. Luckily, her personality doesn't reflect on that.

She's listening to a playlist that's made up of popular pop music for the most part. Incredibly repetitive songs that basically only use two or three chords throughout the entire song. The lyrics in some of them are pretty bizarre too.

"Hey kids, spelling is fun!"

"Yeah you got that yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy yummy."

"I know you love Shrek, because we've watched it twelve times."

Plus a bunch of Korean songs that neither of us can understand.

I feel like an old lady complaining about "kids these days."

"Sure, go ahead."

I connect my phone to the Bluetooth speakers. I continue playing Schumann's Kinderszenen Op. 15 No.7 where I left off an hour ago. A very gentle and pleasant song. I was stumped, not having written anything after fiddling around with the piano for hours. Listening to it was helping get my creative juices flowing again.

It was one of the songs that helped inspire my very first piece when I was seven. Looking at that composition now makes me cringe, like one of those embarrassing memories that keeps you up late at night. It sounds terrible, I can't believe I actually played it on TV a couple times way back then.

Alyssa laughs. "Is this all you ever listen to?"

I roll my eyes playfully. "Hey, you interrupted me while I was in the middle of practicing."

Leave it to Alyssa to show up at the apartment unannounced at 9pm and insist I come to a party with her. Her ability to persuade people is honestly kind of scary sometimes.

I take out my phone and open up a music composition app. Mom commissioned some software engineers to develop the app specifically for me a few years ago. It's not really necessary, I had been fine using free ones in the past. I will admit it's helpful though, having one that has exactly everything I need - and more.

"C'mon Mel, when are you ever not practicing?" she teases.

I stick my tongue out at her and return to my phone. I create a couple random bars with some ideas as I listen to the song. It's not the easiest without being able to properly play and hear the actual notes myself, but hey, look at Beethoven. Let me follow my delusional aspirations to be as talented as him.

"It does sound pretty though," she admits with a soft giggle.

-----

"We're here," Alyssa announces gleefully as we pull up in front of a giant house. Above the front door are some Greek letters engraved onto a rectangular golden plate, "ΑΔΠ"

We enter the house. It's crowded, dark, and noisy. Dim outlines of people and furniture are barely visible. The strong smell of alcohol and musk hangs low in the humid air. The loud, low bass music vibrates deep in my chest. We weave our way through tightly packed groups of people, most of them greet Alyssa enthusiastically. It seems like there isn't a single person here who doesn't know who she is.

A couple of excited looking girls quickly rush up to us.

"Hey Liss! Where have you been?" A red headed girl quickly pulls her into a hug. She's wearing a short blue dress and subtle shimmery glitter on her cheeks.

One of the other girls, a small brunette, suddenly notices me. "Oh my gosh, you must be Alyssa's cousin, Melody right? I'm Carmen, you're so pretty! I love your outfit!" she exclaims in a heavy valley-girl accent.

I've barely nodded before she pulls me into a bone crushingly tight hug. Her skin is hot and she smells like a mix of alcohol and perfume. "N-nice to meet you," I manage to choke out with the little air left in my lungs.

She and one of the other girls take my hands and start pulling me through the house. "Let's get something to drink!" I turn around with panicked, wide eyes towards Alyssa. She just gives me an encouraging wave and shouts something over the music about having fun. What have I gotten myself into?

-----

After god knows how many shots, I find myself sitting on the floor in the hallway with a bunch of other girls. My face and body feel flushed and hot. Everything is kind of fuzzy and the room feels like it's spinning, but I'm good, so good. I can't even remember the last time I've gotten this drunk.

"Cole huh? You're so lucky," the girl sitting across from me, I think her name is Megan, gushes excitedly. Her uncoordinated tipsy movements causes her to spill some of her drink on the floor. I doubt anyone will notice though, the floors here are already so sticky. "He's so hot."

The girl sitting next to her, Grace I think, scoffs and flips her long brown hair over her shoulder. "He ghosted me last semester. Me! How dare he."

"Relax Grace," Carmen laughs and nudges her. "You ghost guys all the time, maybe it's just like, the universe giving you a taste of your own medicine or something."

Even my intoxicated brain can tell I'd find these girls ridiculous during any other occasion, but my intoxicated brain also doesn't care.

"I agree with Megan," a really pretty girl with long black hair sitting next to me adds. I have no clue what her name is. "We had a friends with benefits thing going on a couple months ago." She proceeds to go into detail about their...endeavors. It makes even more heat rush to my already flushed cheeks.

As another girl shares her... thoughts on Cole, I get a heavy and uncomfortable feeling in my chest. My mind is too fuzzy to decipher what these feelings are. I blame the alcohol. Cole and I are just friends.

Right?

The last thing I remember is someone handing out another round of shots and I suddenly find myself standing in a different hallway alone in a confused daze. I'm holding a red solo cup with no recollection as to where I got it from, nor what's in it. The party is still going strong. There are probably even more people now than when I got here.

"Hey, I haven't seen you around before," a deep voice says. "Which sorority are you from?"

I turn, and my already palpitating heart speeds up even more. Golden blonde hair, chocolatey brown eyes, chiseled features, and a bright smile. "O-oh I'm not from here," I stammer, trying to steady my spinning head. I still feel incredibly disoriented. "I'm...Melody, Alyssa's my...my cousin."

He raises an eyebrow and grins. "Oh, well nice to meet you, Melody. I'm Chris." He reaches out to shake my hand. "You're from out of town eh? Maybe I could show you around." He places an arm around me and starts leading me somewhere.

The alcohol is dulling my anxiety as we walk through the house. It's dulling everything in fact. What is even happening?

--------------------------------

kpop fans please don't come for me 😂😭

Thanks for reading! :)