that she was close to that edge, close to the exact place that I wanted her. It was time. It was fucking time. Literally.

Without even bothering with towels, we stumbled over each other on the way back to the bed, collapsing onto it and letting the sheets soak up the shower water. Immediately, I covered Collins' body with mine, kissing her hard and deep until I felt her open up beneath me.

"Condom," I rasped, breaking our kiss to rummage on the floor for the wallet in my pants pocket.

Collins waited, surprisingly patient, as I rolled the rubber over my length. Her eyes slid down my body, following drips of water with her gaze. I understood the fascination, though. Her skin was all dewy, and I wanted to lick her from head to toe. She was like a fucking goddess. It was unreal.

Straddling her on the bed, I trailed two fingers between her legs again, easily sliding them into her pussy. She arched off the bed, moaning my name as I worked her back up again.

"I only had one of these in my wallet," I said, gesturing to the condom wrapper on the bed. "So let's make this count and get those hips up, huh?"

—

By the time we left the party, we were too tipsy to dance, let alone drive. So after a shameless plea to the ever-responsible, ever-sober Grayson to keep Nessa out of our apartment tonight, I left my keys with him and called for a ride. And then tried not to get ahead of myself while waiting for it.

But I'd been holding back for far too long to actually, like, do that.

Collins stood in front of me, leaning lazily against my chest. Tipping her head back, she pressed a kiss beneath my jaw, humming pleasantly. It might have been the first time that she had initiated a kiss, and even though it was the tiniest of kisses, my heart fucking soared. "Tonight was fun," she said.

"Glad we stayed?" I asked. Personally, I had mixed feelings about it. But then, she probably wasn't as fucking horny as me. We were a few feet from the curb, and even though anyone could see us if they walked or drove by, my fingers could not stay away from the hem of her dress. The alcohol had left a pleasant hum, a warm glow. And everything felt like a goddamn fantasy that was spiraling out of control.

"Yeah," she said, a glint in her eyes, "but I'm also glad we're leaving."

"Me too," I agreed without hesitation. "After all, you still didn't answer my question."

"What question?"

Drawing my hands up her sides, I settled them on her waist, pulling her tighter to my chest. "You said you think about me, think about that night. I want to know what happens when you do that."

"What happens?" Collins squeaked, turning around to look up at me. There was a tiny slope to the ground we were standing on, making her seem shorter, and she had to tip her head back to stare into my eyes.

"Yeah." I leaned down to give her a slow, lingering kiss before breaking away to repeat, "What happens?" When she was speechless, I prompted her. "For example, when I think about that night, I usually end up with my hand wrapped around my cock until I come thinking about being inside you."

Collins' breathing was shallow against my lips, but she didn't say anything.

"Your turn," I muttered before leaning back.

If I had any possibility of getting it out of her, it was right now. Right at this moment. And sure, I could just forget it, but I had been practically surviving off this fantasy for a year now. Or rather, surviving off this hope—a hope that Collins had spent the last twelve months pinning after me like I had with her. Did that make me a desperate fucker? Absolutely it did. Did I care? Absolutely I did not.

She bit down on her lip, thinking, and the little action drove me to my wit's end.

"Sometimes when I'm trying to sleep, I imagine your voice," she admitted.

Oh, God. This was going to destroy me somehow, wasn't it? Collins had said before that she struggled to sleep at night, and my voice was what she turned to? God help me. Now she was either going to say something adorable, and my poor heart would burst into pieces, or something hot as hell, and it would be my dick that would pay. I asked for it, though, so I cleared my throat and lowered my voice.

"What am I saying?"

Collins twisted her arms around my neck, leaning into me. "Dirty things. Things you've said to me before."

I swallowed a groan as heat rushed through my body. "Does it turn you on?" She nodded, and I inched closer. "Tell me you touch yourself, then."

"I touch myself," she whispered, a shininess to her eyes that made me wish that I was the artist. What I wouldn't do to capture this version of Collins, this one right here on an empty midnight street. This girl who was so at ease in the moonlight that her secrets were visible in her eyes.

Baby girl was stripped down, and I planned to keep it that way.

"Have you done it when I've been home?" I asked, failing to stop myself from imagining the image of Collins in her bed at our apartment, her hand between her legs, her eyes closed in pleasure. And all while thinking of me. Of me, goddamnit. It was more than I could handle, and my throat grew dry. "Have you touched yourself while lying across the hall from me?"

This time when Collins responded, her voice was even quieter. Her words even more forbidden. "I have."

Yep. Never going to recover from that. Not in a million years. Something bubbled up inside me, something that sizzled and crackled and set everything aflame.

"No more," I said, grabbing her chin so she wouldn't look away, so she understood how fucking serious I was about this. "No more lying across the hallway at night. If you need help falling asleep, I'll help you fall asleep. I'll even whisper dirty things in your ear while you touch yourself if you want. But I want to be there."

Collins whimpered and opened her mouth, but the screech of tires cut her off. Our ride—right. This was good. This was definitely good because it meant we were one step closer to making it home.

"After you," I said, holding open the car door for her.

Collins slid in, settling on the opposite side of the car, behind the driver seat. And after noticing how tense she seemed to get after buckling herself in, I scooted over to sit in the middle, wanting to be close to her.

When I drove her home from Grayson's house earlier this fall, she had acted the same way after getting into the car—withdrawn and hesitant. And that memory was what made it click in my seemingly empty brain that she was in a car accident that changed her life, and she probably didn't fucking like cars.

I gritted my teeth together in frustration, my mood immediately souring at the thought of what she'd gone through, of that asshole penguin and his fucking family. It wasn't the time to bring it up, though, so I settled my hand on her leg firmly, wanting her to know I was there.

"You admitted last night that you do dream a bit between all your hard work," I said, thinking of something to distract her. "So, have you decided where you'd go? If you could go anywhere in the world?"

The car pulled away from the curb and the driver, a middle-aged dude, turned up the music a little bit, giving us some privacy. The Killers floated into the backseat, the opening to Mr. Brightside filling my bones with giddiness. Collins bit down on her lip while she thought about her answer. "I'm afraid if I tell you, you'll try to take me there tomorrow," she said with a tiny laugh.

"I suppose that's always a possibility," I replied with a smile. "Depending on where you say."

"Beau..." she said, a warning of sorts.

"I'm gonna spoil you, baby," I said, feeling awfully excited about it. It was a goddamn opportunity of a lifetime. Like in the way that some people saw new jobs or vacations, but only because it changed their definition of living, of having lived. Being with Collins changed my definition of living. "And there's nothing you can do about it. So you might as well tell me."

"Fine," she huffed, and a little tipsy smile appeared on her face, telling me that she only dared to dream when her walls fell. "Italy."

I nodded, not entirely surprised by her response. Sighing wistfully, she leaned her head against the car door. "All the art," she said, the simplest of explanations.

"There's art all over the world, though," I pointed out.

"I know, but there's something about mythological works like Botticelli. It's like slices of heaven on earth." Collins' eyes lit up in the dark car. "I'd love to see it in real life, to see the centuries-old brush strokes. And also I'd love to see the Statue of David—"

"There's where I'm gonna stop you, sweetheart." I held my hand up. "Because if you want to see a naked man posing, you just have to ask. I've already told you that all you need to do is turn the thermostat up in the apartment just a tad."

Collins rolled her eyes, but then a giggle slipped out, uninvited.

"Also, don't you think it's just a little weird how people pay money to go stare at some guy's balls made out of clay?" I added.

"Beau, it's not clay. It's marble."

"Okay, fine. We can go to Italy if that's what you want. I need to check up on my man Dante, anyway."

She side-eyed me. "Dante?"

"Yeah, you know the guy with the inferno."

"Wait." She shook her head, backtracking. "We're not going to Italy, Beau. That's...that's ridiculous."

Goddamnit. I couldn't even get three-drinks-in Collins to agree to hop onto my magic carpet.

"It doesn't have to be Italy," I said with a shrug, "but I do want to take you places."

"Like where?"

Squeezing her thigh, I felt Collins' sharp intake of breath. "I don't know," I said, feeling like what I was about to say was a big step, even though we'd already leaped ahead. "Dinner, to start."

A smile simmered on her face. "We already had dinner. We had leftovers with Nessa before the party."

I ran my fingers up the length of her thigh, giving myself free rein of that soft skin beneath her dress. "Thankfully, dinner is something you tend to do every day," I murmured.

"Beau," Collins sighed, letting her head fall back against the seat as I began to stroke her inner thigh, inching higher and higher.

"Shh," I said, knowing that despite the music the driver had playing, we probably were lacking a whole lot of discretion. Fuck if I cared, though. Tilting her head to the side, Collins invited my lips to her neck, and I gladly RSVP'd yes to that shit, attaching my mouth and sucking a gentle path up to her ear. "Soon, sweetheart. We'll be home soon."

"I want everything tonight, Beau," she said, cutting straight to the point in such a brisk Collins-like way. And it utterly destroyed me, but I had to say...

"No, not tonight."

Her expression crumbled, and then she pinned me with a glare. "Why the hell not?"

I chuckled before responding with a whisper pressed to her skin. "Because first of all, you're tipsy—we both are—and I need you to be able to remember very clearly how it feels to have me inside you again."

"I never forget anything when I drink," she quickly retorted, shifting in her seat as I continued to caress her skin. "That's not a valid excuse, so your next one needs to be better."

A smile cracked my lips. "Second of all, I want to take you on a date first. I want to make sure you realize what this is and what this isn't."

"What do you mean?"

"We're not just roommates who are fucking, Collins," I muttered. "We're roommates who are dating."

Her punchy response followed a soft moan. "I'd like to be both, please."

Shit, she was amazing. "Oh, we'll be both, baby girl. We will be. Patience."

Unable to help myself, I traced along her bikini line with a fingertip, flirting with the lace of her underwear, and Collins parted her legs. But I refused to touch her how she wanted, and she lifted her hips in a plea. Begging. She was just as anxious as me, and boy, did I love it.

"Says the guy who's been complaining that it's been almost a year since he's gotten some." She stiffened. "Well, I'm sure—you've probably—other...." Collins stopped, scrunching up her nose for a second before I saw how her eyebrows rose in the dark. "Hey, when you say dating...does that mean exclusively dating? Because I—"

I cut her off by cupping her sex roughly, and Collins had to drop into the crook of my neck to muffle a groan. The thought of some other guys' hands on her made me want to ball my hands into fists. Even with freaking Reggie tonight, I nearly lost my shit. "Yes, we're definitely exclusive," I said. "Super-exclusive. Really, really exclusive. One might even say mega-exclusive. Ridiculously—"

Collins stopped my rambling with a kiss. "Okay, good," she breathed against my mouth before squirming against my hand, trying without success to get it to shift to where she wanted it.

Not so fast, baby girl.

Collins continued to wiggle in her seat for the rest of the ride to our place, which thankfully was short. After thanking our driver and resisting the urge to apologize for whatever he overheard, I followed Collins through our front door, fully intending to throw her up against the nearest flat surface as soon as we got inside our apartment.

To my surprise and complete, utter delight, she beat me to it. My gorgeously perfect, profoundly beautiful roommate pushed me up against the door as soon as it closed behind us, and then she kissed the ever-loving shit out of me.

Her lips captured mine aggressively, almost as though she'd known I'd needed her like that. Stripped down. Finally unrestrained. My hands found her waist and then her lower back and then her ass, hoisting her against me. Oh, fuck, she felt good when she was all over me, when I was all over her. Collins moaned into my mouth as she grabbed at my clothes, wanting them off. And with absolutely nothing left to stand between us, I knew...I knew this was the moment she brought me to my knees.

But once again, Collins beat me to it.

Lacking any sort of pretense, Collins dropped to the floor in front of me and palmed my erection, glancing up at me with hooded eyes.

God, it's me again. I take back all the times I got mad at you. You're a real one. Honestly, man.

"Beau?" she asked when I didn't do a damn thing other than stare down at her in wonder. Because what a goddamn wonder she was.

"I—yeah?"

She'd taken away my ability to form thoughts or sentences. Her hand stroked over me again, and my mind got caught in a web of desire she'd spun. But if there was anywhere that I wanted to be stuck, it was right fucking here.

Her fingers curled into the waistband of my sweatpants, and I was pretty sure that even though it was a chilly night, there was suddenly sweat running down my back. The look Collins had pinned me with was so innocent, but when she licked her lips, I knew whatever she planned to say next would be the goddamn end of me.

Here lies Beau, a man who couldn't handle how hot his girl was.

"I want you to come in my mouth this time," she whispered.

Yep, there it was.

Gripping her jaw, I groaned. "What are you trying to do to me, baby girl?"

She smiled, and it blazed, burning through all my clothes and making me sweat even more.

"I'm trying to suck you off," she said plainly. "I thought that was pretty obvious."

When all I did was blink at her and try not to blow a load right then and there, Collins added, "And this isn't because we're trading favors. This isn't because of any reason besides the fact that I want you, Beau." She paused. "More specifically, I want you in my mouth."

"Holy shit," I muttered, threading my fingers into her hair as she tugged my pants down over my hips. "Well, I did say that giving you what you want is my favorite fucking thing."

"You did," she agreed, watching with shallow breaths as my erection sprang free in front of her. Her eyes widened, and I was admittedly surprised at her surprise.

Honestly a low blow there, Collins baby, that you didn't have the exact size and shape of my dick memorized like the way I'd immortalized every inch of you in my mind.

"You forget, sweetheart?" I asked with a smirk that I knew was overly cocky, but I couldn't hold back. When she floundered for a response, my smile grew. "Don't worry. We both know it fits, don't we?"

"We do," she breathed, and then barely another second passed before I was in her mouth. And what a glorious, glorious mouth it was. Heat and pleasure trickled up my spine, spreading to every inch of me.

"Oh my God, Collins," I groaned, tightening my grip on the back of her head and helping her keep a pace that already had me on edge.

Her eyes flicked up when I said her name, and she watched my expression while slowly taking me in as deep as she could. I felt her throat struggle to accept me and then relax, and Collins looked utterly satisfied. Not as fucking satisfied as me, though. That look of hers alone nearly topped all my fantasies, all my memories. I was moments away from declaring how obsessed with her I was, but then again, she probably already knew.

My gaze trailed over her, catching the movement of her hand as it slid up her dress and dipped between her legs. Fuck, she wasn't allowed to do that; she wasn't allowed to be hotter than she already was.

"Does sucking me off make you wet, sweetheart?" I rasped, hardly able to talk between the deep breaths and the saturation of pleasure and bliss.

Dedicated to her task, she kept me in her mouth as she nodded, staring upward. A moan ricocheted through her body, and then it transferred into mine, slowly destroying me, and I watched her eyelashes flutter, those tiny signs of delight that she always showed me.

"Don't come," I said, pressing my fingers into her scalp, massaging. "I want your orgasm tonight, okay?"

She cried out around my dick in response, which told me she was taking her job of fingering herself too seriously.

"Okay?" I repeated through gritted teeth, feeling the need to reiterate what I wanted. But then I lost sight of what I was even asking with how deep, how hard she took me into her mouth. And that was it; an overwhelming blast of heat racketed through my body as I came without warning. After swearing repeatedly, I cried out Collins' name and blinked through the spots in my eyesight so I could watch her swallow every last bit of cum like a good fucking girl.

Sliding me out of her mouth, Collins stood again.

"Okay," she said with a heart-fluttering, dick-re-hardening smile before turning to walk into the kitchen like she hadn't just given me the head of my lifetime. "What about a midnight snack?" she called over her shoulder.