11/04/2015

chapter thirteen ;

♡

time I had seen, the skies of the Valley burned gray and rain fell at a steady pace. I loved it.

The house was empty, peaceful, so I sat at my bedroom window, reading. I didn't even notice when Benny crossed the street and entered my house – not until he knocked on my bedroom door.

Slowly closing the book, feeling a knot clench in my stomach, I called, "Come in." It could have been anyone. Austin had been thrown in prison, but the anxiety never truly left.

When the door swung open, I was relieved to find Benny, standing in a black bomber jacket, rain pasting his black hair to his forehead. He cast a smile. "I really like rain."

Pointing at his hair, I nodded, laughing, "I can see that."

Benny strode toward me, and just as I made it to my feet, he enveloped me in his arms. Despite his wet jacket, he somehow managed to feel warm – and, as per usual, he smelled wonderful. Eyes fluttering to a close, the corners of my lips quirked.

"Happy four months, babe," he mumbled, burying his face into my hair. "And you smell really good."

My mouth pulled into a grin. "A dramatic four months. But happy. And thanks – I put this coconut stuff in my hair, and it smells great."

"Yeah," he laughed, pulling away. Without really even thinking about it, I ran my fingers through his hair, pushing his wet locks back to the side. He gazed down on me with warm eyes. "At least in everything that's happened, I've got you."

"Exactly my thoughts." I kissed him then, a short lock of lips. Even in its casualty, the kiss managed to shock my heart.

"Mom's cooking for us," he said, "since your parents won't be home for a while. Stir fry and stuff you like. Will you come?"

"Do you even need to ask?" A grin painted my lips. "Just let me go get changed."

As I gathered a pair of jeans and a white T-shirt, Benny snatched the book I had been reading from the chair and plopped onto my bed. "What's a City of Bones?"

"A book with a really hot guy named Jace in it." Leaving the bathroom door cracked open, I wrenched my tank top off.

Benny frowned, flipping through the pages. "If it's not a picture book, how do you know he's hot?"

While slipping the new T-shirt over my body, I peeked at Benny from the crack in the door, a smirk playing on my lips. "I really don't know how to explain that to you, Ben."

"Ben?" He failed to hide his smile, so he covered half of his face with the open book.

"I think I'm about to start calling you Ben Finn."

"What the hell is a Ben Finn?"

"Never mind," I laughed. After replacing my shorts with a pair of jeans, I exited the bathroom, throwing my used clothes onto my bed. "I'm putting those back on when I get back. They're clean, so shut up."

Benny chuckled. "I didn't say anything, you psycho. You look beautiful."

I cocked an eyebrow – clearly he had lost his sight – but flashed a smile. "Thank you."

Finally I slipped into a pair of black combat boots that reached mid-calf. In its natural curls, I was satisfied with my hair. It had finally reached a length that proved its growth – my raven locks reached the middle of my back in its curly state, which meant that it was actually even longer.

"You know . . ." Benny eyed me carefully, "I don't know if I've pointed this out before, and I'm not trying to sound like a jerk, but you have a great body. Like . . . you have perfect curves."

"Oh, my God," I laughed, pressing my cool fingers to my burning cheeks. "Thanks. Let's go now."

I made my way to the door, and Benny trailed behind me. As we neared the staircase, he said, "I mean, really. Everything about you is just . . . wow."

"Benny," I laughed, shaking my head and continuing on, "you can stop now."

A moment of silence passed, just enough for the both of us to reach the living room floor. "I mean, it's the truth," Benny shrugged. "And you talk about how you're insecure about your body sometimes, so I just thought you should know . . . you have nothing to feel insecure about. I mean, nothing."

Laughing, I sighed, "Oh, Jesus. Thank you. Now you're making me blush. I hate blushing."

"You're cute when you blush."

All I could do was sigh and grin, with no idea of how to reply. Benny simply laughed and caught my hand in his, twining our fingers.

The atmosphere in the Rodriguez house clearly differed from my own. Even though the only ones present were the two women of the house, the air buzzed with noise – Elizabeth and Lynn's voice joined Whitney Houston's, dancing in the warmly lit kitchen.

"And IIIIII will always love you!"

My brows rose immediately. "Oh, my God."

"What?" Benny asked, kicking the door shut behind us.

"They sing really good," I said, gaping at the women as they continued to sing. "Like . . . they should be famous for that."

"I guess it kind of runs in the family for women," Benny shrugged. "Every female relative of mine can sing." Then a smirk curled on his lips. "You have a great voice, too. Sing with them."

"Ha! No."

Benny grinned, but he didn't push me. "Fine. Well, I have something to show you. Let's get out of here before they notice us."

Fortunately (I think) the women were caught up in their own world, so Benny and I slipped upstairs with ease. The boy's hand tangled with my own, and he led me into his bedroom.

"Okay," Benny said, forcing me to sit down on the bed, "there was a time that my mom mentioned something to you. At the beach, we had that little conversation about how many pictures we take . . . Do you remember that?"

"Yeah," I admitted. "She almost let out a secret or something. You said it was a surprise. Are you finally showing me?"

A broad grin spread across Benny's perfect face. "Yes. Yes, I am."

From beneath his bed he pulled out a large leather-bound picture book. The cover was blank, simply smooth, brown leather. He sat beside me, a tugging smile remaining on his lips.

"I've had this since I was born," he said. "My parents got it for me, to store all of the pictures of my life as I grew. They started it out with baby pictures . . ." He opened the book, and flipped the pages as he explained its content. "The family. That's my dad."

Benny's finger pressed against an old polaroid of a much younger Lynn and a young man at her side. My mouth fell open – it was startling how much the man looked like Benny, with more facial hair and slicked back hair. He even had the same smile as his son.

"Wow," I breathed, awe coating my voice. "You look just like him. And Liz looks just like Lynn."

"Yeah," Benny chuckled. "Crazy, isn't it? Anyway . . . there are a bunch of pictures of my early years. After my dad died, well, it's mostly pictures of the sandlot and the boys. And there aren't many."

My eyes scanned the pages, spotting a younger Benny — thin, baby-faced, filthy with dirt and sweat, and determined. I noticed how, as the few pictures progressed, there were new additions, such as Tommy and Smalls. And then . . . then there was me.

I didn't remember anyone taking the first picture; of course, in the photo, my focus was clearly on baseball. Benny, on third base, held his glove up in the air to catch the ball as I raced for his base. Oddly, rather than on the sky, his eyes were set on me.

"Who took this picture?" I inquired, voice light.

"Think it was Skylar," Benny shrugged. "One of those times she just watched us play. Well, I was really embarrassed about this one. I tried to deny that I was staring at you. Luke gave me a lot of crap about it. Wouldn't let me forget."

A laugh escaped my throat, and it felt warm. True happiness heated my skin and pumped through my veins.

"Anyway . . ." Benny continued, "soon my life became less about baseball and more about . . . you."

And he showed me this, flipping through page upon page, each filled with pictures of us. Every picture I recalled – and didn't recall – rested here, protected beneath a thin sheet of transparent paper.

There was us – Benny kissing my cheek, with a beautiful sunset in our background. Colors painted the sky, but I remembered how they seemed to flash before my eyes when Benny kissed me.

And there – Benny and me sleeping on the ground of the treehouse, sharing a sleeping bag. The blanket covered only my legs, providing a perfect view of Benny's form molded against the back of mine, his arm wrapped tightly around my waist. We were both sound asleep, utterly peaceful – And my gray hoodie lay in a heap at my side, although I had gone to sleep in it. I still didn't know how that happened.

The day at the pool, in which Benny and I had spent our time trying to drown each other. At the end of the day, when our wicked efforts were reduced to laughter, Kenny had snapped a photo of us standing side-by-side, arm in arm. Bright grins plastered across our faces – I had never smiled for a camera that way. Somehow I failed to understand how I had been so hurt by Benny calling me his best friend. I should have felt fortunate.

The fair. At the top of the ferris wheel. We did not kiss like most would have, but he did have his arms thrown around my shoulders.

Our many trips with Lynn – The zoo. Santa Monica beach. A few pictures of Lynn's birthday party; there was even one of me giving Lynn my gift, a replica of the Titanic's version of the Heart of the Ocean necklace.

There must have been hundreds of photos of solely me and Benny, though. He even had pictures of just me – one of me in my church dress, another of me sitting on the bathroom floor, shielding my face with my phone (while we were trying our hardest not to hear my brother and his girlfriend). There was even a few pictures of me sleeping, which I could not be angry about.

"I've only known you for five months total," Benny spoke, breaking the silence. "But you're one of the most important things in my life. I never knew what it felt like to be in love . . . I never cared to know. But you came along and you flipped my world upside down, and I've never been happier. Loving you makes me feel like I'm a king. And I just wanted to thank you for that."

Tears burned the backs of my eyes and clutched my throat, and I beamed at the boy, unable to tear my eyes away. "What are you thanking me for exactly?"

"For showing me what I was missing out on all those years. Showing me how much more beautiful the world is when you love someone. That there's so much more to life than baseball. I can see now why my dad gave up his dream to play for the Major Leagues. My mom didn't ruin his future – she made it into something so much better. I can see myself in him. I can see her in you.

"And I know things happen, but if we don't last – I really hope we do, but if we don't – I want you to know that I will remember and love you always." And Benny closed the picture book full of memories, glossy eyes locked on mine all the while.

In all of the instances that I had attempted to realize just how strongly I felt for Benny, I'd never felt as in love with him as I did in that moment. And what could I say, when his words stole my breath? The admiration in his eyes – in spite of every relationship that had gone to Hell, of my biased view, I could not mistake or deny his sincerity, his love for me. I didn't want to.

And so, in my inability to speak, I pressed my mouth to his. I tried to channel all of my emotion into the one kiss. One would expect a desperate, fervent make-out session – but my lips were primarily tender, moving slowly on his. He mirrored my movements, sliding his fingers between my curly hair.

Truthfully, I could have kissed him forever. If never releasing him was an option, I would have taken it. But I pulled away eventually – unsure of how long the kiss had lasted – and a gentle smile decorated my lips.

"I hope you got the message," I whispered, intertwining my fingers with his on instinct.

Benny returned my gaze without relent and with stars in his eyes. "I did."

♡

"We're not letting this rain get us down!" Lynn grinned. "Stir fry – done. Cookies – done. Cake . . . later."

I laughed loudly, leaning against the kitchen counter to face Lynn. "You're in a really good mood."

"Yes, I am," Lynn winked, rushing forward to plant a kiss on my forehead. "As the time passes, I feel surer and surer that you and my son will get married. That way, you can take me to Paris on your honeymoon."

"Mom – " Benny broke off with a laugh, and Elizabeth watched us from the table, setting plates with a smile. Her dark hair fell over her face in strands, and she looked younger than she ever had.

"And why," I inquired, "are we having a cake?"

"You said it," Lynn replied, pulling a large purple bowl out of a cabinet. "I'm in a good mood. And I feel like the occasion calls for cake."

I grinned at Benny, who stood a few feet away from me. "I'm glad our four-month dating anniversary is counted kind of like a holiday. This is awesome."

"My family is so extra," Benny shrugged, earning a loud laugh from Elizabeth. "Liz told me that once."

The Rodriguez house felt like my home, alive and buzzing with warmth and joy. We did not let the rain dampen our good time. In fact, we danced in the rain while we could, enveloped in joyful serenity.

♡

this chapter, i think, is shorter than the others, but honestly, i feel like the others are dreadful to read. seriously, chapter two was over 40 pages – wtf!

anyway, this story has been declining votes- and comments-wise. i think it may be on account of the length, and perhaps it's boring as well. but it will pick up. i promise.

July 8, 2017