cuniff

Shawn... Oh Shawn. Sleeping with Matthew constantly has been easy for me to get over the fact that this whole thing between Shawn and I will never happen.

So, the thing is, I don't like Matthew. And he says he doesn't like me. This is simply, a friends with benefits thing. But not even that good of friends either. Well, true, we were growing okay as friends. Gradually, it's alright.

And it's funny, Shawn hasn't showed up to my store and it's been four days. That's a record for him. The longest he has been away was for only two days.

It feels a little empty. I miss him bringing light into my store. Literally, he makes the sun shine in here on how wide he opens the door.

When I get to the dorm I see Shawn before seeing Matthew. And another. "Gray?" I see one of my employees from the shop. "Oh hey. What are you doin' here."

"I live here. And what about you?" Grayson shrugs. "Shawn invited me over." Why would Shawn invite him over. "This isn't your dorm Shawn. What makes you think you can bring other people?"

"It's not just your dorm. It's Matt's and clearly, I asked and he allowed me to bring this really cute guy over. Okay?" Shawn stands up and crosses his arms.

"I thought you're straight. I mean, not that there's anything wrong with a hetero calling a homo cute but-" I try to explain myself but the irritation in Shawn rolling his eyes annoys me.

"God. Shawn. You're not who I thought you were. And to think I fell for you a week ago." With a ton of emotions and a crowded room, I leave with a slam of the door.

I thought he was sweet, and kind. Someone who gave me butterflies from doing everything possible. But I was wrong. Should of expected it from a guy who bought extra large condoms back to back, and just storming off. Anxious guy.

- April 3 16