"I knew it. She doesn't like me," you sighed as you and Kuroo walked back to your room after dinner. Kuroo's stepmom was passive-aggressive with you the entire time.

"Don't bother. She doesn't like anyone," Kuroo grabbed your hand and took you out the back door.

"Huh? What are you—"

"Come with me," he took a key out of his pocket, pointing it to Oikawa's car. The lights flickered and turned on.

"Uh, sure," you followed him. "What are we doing?"

"Let's drop this off," he got in the car and started it. "We can walk back. It's only five minutes and the weather's nice."

You shrugged and watched as he drove. He seemed tense, filled with stress. Even his hectic job never seemed to bother him this much. It must have been his stepmom bothering him.

"Are you okay?" you asked as he backed up into an area on the grass, parking the car. He sighed, aggressively pushing the gear causing you to flinch.

"Mhm," he mumbled, not very convincingly. "Sorry for scaring you," he got out of the car and leaned against the door, staring at the sky.

You walked out back and found him—his eyes seemed lost. You tugged his arm and looked up as he immediately collapsed on your side.

"It's okay, I'm here," you sat down and took his head in your lap, running fingers through his hair.

You tried to think of how to comfort him but couldn't think of anything. It'd been two years you'd never seen him like this—the only way you could think of helping him was the way he'd helped you.

"I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong," you smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "I'm not like you who knows everything you know."

"I'm sorry Y/N," he sighed, laying on his back and looking up at you. "You have so much more serious things to deal with and here I am getting worked up over that old hag."

"Oh," you were caught off guard. "I think I've moved past everything you know—what happened on New Years. You're allowed to act worked up too. Everyone does," you laughed, thinking of how stupid his concern was.

"Not that," he took a peppermint from his pocket and tossed it in the air a few times. You two were silent for a while.

Kuroo thought back to what he told Zen earlier. If you gave him the chance, he'd marry you in a heartbeat.

But he couldn't do that if there were lies between you both. He knew he had to tell you what he'd kept secret.

"I know, you know," he muttered quietly. "About what you keep here," he reached for your chest. You stopped him, grabbing his hand and looking around to make sure no one was around.

"What are you talking about?" you gulped in an attempt to play dumb.

"I know who you really are," he continued. "It doesn't really bother me though. It'll all be over soon."

"What'll be over?" you gave a half-assed attempt at a lie, looking into his eyes. As usual, he saw through everything.

He'd known? For how long? Was he a part of the plan the government had set for you? Questions flooded your head as you tried to remain calm.

"H-how long?" you whispered, realizing how futile your attempt at hiding it was.

"That's not important," he sat up, handing you the peppermint. You dropped it on the grass.

"I asked how long," you grabbed his collar and then let go. You never did this and Kuroo knew you were uncomfortable now.

"From the beginning," he said hesitantly. "Your handler told me before your first day." You got up, stepping on the peppermint and looking away.

From the beginning? Knowing this, you replayed every part, every conversation from your relationship, from his initial fixation on you to him saying you worried too much.

Nothing felt the same. You couldn't tell what was real and what were premeditated actions.

"Was any of it even real then?" you asked through hazy breaths. You didn't even know if the answer he gave you would matter, but you had to know anyway.

"Y/N don't say—"

"I am saying it. Was any of it real? Or was your whole gig just to flirt and get me under your roof so you could keep an eye on me," you muttered, feeling tears fall down your eyes.

You felt Kuroo place a hand on your shoulder. You quickly turned around, removing his hand and revealing the tears you had just shed.

"I swear it wasn't like that," he took his thumb and wiped a tear from your face.

"Just stay away from me please," you pushed him away again, grabbing the keys from the car hood beside you. "Can you even prove it? Can you honestly say the reason you're with me isn't because you had to protect me? Even just a little?"

He lightly shook his head after what felt like hours. Part of what made him so attracted to you was knowing your background and having the duty to protect you.

"I'll take these to Oikawa then. You'd better get back to the house," your voice cracked as you walked to the inn.

"Wait, Y/N!"

You stopped, some part of your heart hoping he would say something that could make you feel less betrayed.

"Kisa wants you to read her that bedtime story. She brought it especially for you to read. She doesn't like when I read it." You clenched your fist.

"I'm not her family or anything," you said, back facing Kuroo. "Just tell everyone I'm catching up with a friend. You can do that, right? Put on a show and lie to people. You're great at it, even fooled me."

You shuddered at your over the top statement, but it was true. It was also true for you, who'd lied to him many times to keep your past a secret. In this moment you not only hated Kuroo, but yourself too.

Kuroo watched as you walked away, slamming his fist on the car once you disappeared from his view.

He couldn't lie to you.

Yeah, he'd originally gotten close because he had to protect you, but that night at the park when you told him you really liked him, everything changed.

He didn't tell you because he wanted to be your escape from the past.

😭