🏈

I just stared at him the entire time until the bell rang. He never once looked my way and kept his head down. Come on, Shorty. After I apologized yesterday he hasn’t said a word or given me any glance at all. Except when he handed me the carefully wrapped toast this morning. I smiled at the thought, he still gave me breakfast so I guess we’re fine. I really wanted him to forgive me. Maybe he was still mad at me. I feel nothing but remorse when I recall the look of fear in his eyes that time. I swear I am not that type of person. I might have like teasing him but I make sure I don’t go too far and I make sure my friends don’t as well.

My thoughts got distracted when I saw him stand up and hurriedly get out of the room. I shoved my things in my bag and ran after him. Don’t tell me he forgot.

“Hey, Shorty wait up!” I called after him.

He stopped right outside the door.

“It’s tutor day,” I said.

“I know,”

“Are you still mad at me?” I asked in a hushed voice.

“N-no,” he said quietly.

A smile broke into my face and I ruffled his hair. He squeaked and I caught myself and stopped immediately. It was like my hands have minds of their own, always finding their way to his hair.

“So… we’re going to your house, right?”

He nodded.

“I assume we’re riding in my car,” I asked.

“I uh- yeah, my mom and brother already knows. Besides my brother’s club meeting ends later,” he said.

“Alright, how’s Wayo by the way?” I asked as we make our way to the lockers.

He just stared at me blinking.

“You know my brother’s name?”

“Of course, Beam Baramee Vongphipan,” I said.

He looked so surprised.

“What?” I asked.

“That’s my full name,” he said in a small voice.

I chuckled. “Just because I call you Four-eyes or Shorty doesn’t mean I don’t know your real name.”

“Oh, yeah, okay,” he said it like he was talking to himself.

We were walking towards the parking lot when I hear someone call my name.

“Forth, babe!” It was Jessie, the cheerleading captain. I don’t really consider her my friend because we’re not that close. But she insists that we hang out together since we were the ‘cool’ kids. She thinks my friends and I should be friendly with her group, because popular boys should hang out with popular girls. But I don’t think so. She just comes out to me as stuck-up and snobbish. She might be very pretty but that was it.

“Hey,” I forced a smile at her.

“I know you don’t have practice, wanna hang out with us?” she said as she hugged my arm and placed her chin on my shoulder. Okay, that was just a little too close for comfort.

“Uhm, no. I need to study with Beam,” I said and pointed to Beam at the same time prying her hands off me.

“Who? With that skinny nerd over there?” she pointed to Beam who was standing there with his head down, looking at his shoes.

I gave her a glare which either she didn’t notice or completely ignored.

“Well, that must have sucked for you,” she said and pouted.

“Not really, but I need to catch up on academics and raise my GPA,” I said. "And Beam's gonna help me."

She raised an eyebrow while looking at Beam.

“Fine, call me when you get bored, okay?” she said and stole a kiss on my cheek before running off.

I rolled my eyes and opened my car.

“Shorty?” I called. He lifted his head and looked at me with an unreadable expression.

“Let’s go,” I said and opened the passenger door for him.

***

👓

The ride to my house was awkward, for me at least. It was awfully quiet. Well, because I was awfully nervous that every time he strikes up a conversation I just answer with with a yes, no, or okay. Not to mention that Forth was always looking at me and I don’t know why. Even when he was driving, he kept glancing at me. I just want the ground to swallow me whole every time he does that.

“How about some music,” he said and turned on the stereo.

Soft music played and he hummed while tapping his fingers on the wheel. I told him my address earlier and he seemed to be familiar with the place so I don’t really need to tell him where to turn. I looked out the window to distract myself. My thoughts kept drifting back to the scene earlier. Jessie and him really looked good together. She was really pretty and have a very nice body. Rumors said they were dating, and based on what I’ve seen, it looks like it. The way she was clinging to him brings a sad ache on my chest. How can I compete with her? Of course I won’t have a chance with him. She’s perfect and she is head cheerleader too. While I’m just four-eyes, the pathetic little nerd. Basically a nobody. People like Forth, the good-looking popular ones should be with the equally good-looking popular ones. That’s just how it is.

I sniffled. Trying desperately to contain my emotions.

“Shorty, are you okay?”

I flinched when I felt him touch my shoulder with his free hand. I realized we are at a stop light. Turning to look at him, it surprised me to see the worried look on his face.

“Is your neck, okay? Can I look at the bruise, please,” he asked.

“I- uhm, it’s fine, it doesn’t hurt that much anymore,” I said as I turned my back to him.

He pushed the collar of my shirt aside to take a look. His knuckles brushing at the back of my neck. My eyes involuntarily closed tightly as I feel his warm skin on mine. And it was there for a considerable amount of time. He was gently running his thumb on the portion surrounding the bruised spot. I don’t know how long, but it felt like forever. I feel the heat slowly rushing to my face and ears. He was just checking my neck dammit. The slow music that was softly playing doesn’t help either, with his hand on my neck, both of us just quietly feel the moment. Actually just me feeling the moment, rather. Why would he, though?

We both jolt upright as the vehicle behind us honked loudly. Forth coughed and straightened himself and then drived through the green light.

“Beam, please forgive me,” he said softly.

I looked at him. How many times does he need to apologize?

“You haven’t accepted my apology and I’m worried that you are still mad at me,” he said.

“Oh,” I guess I haven't told him verbally.

“I’m really sorry if I hurt you. If you want you can punch me or something,” he said sincerely which made me laugh.

“I- I forgive you,” I said with a serious voice. “Just forget about it, Forth.”

“Really?” he said loudly.

“Yes,”

“Thank you!” he ruffles my hair and I fight the urge to lean on his hand and purr.

We arrived at my house, and led him to my room. Mom and Wayo weren’t home yet.

I actually feel conscious as I show him inside. Thank God I actually cleaned my room last weekend so it looked presentable enough.

“Wow, how many books do you have?” Forth asked as he inspects the bookshelves in the corner and the books piled on the floor and on the chair beside it.

“I don’t know, I’ve lost count, I love reading and whenever I meet an author I obsess over, I buy all their work,” I explained. Geez, now he might be thinking I’m a crazy bookworm.

“That’s nice, I’ve only read a few books in my life,” he shrugged.

Then he walked over to the other corner beside my bed, the one with the corkboard littered with news and printed article clippings and posters.

“What’s this?” he said pointing to a picture of what looked barren dusty land.

“That’s a photo from Mars, taken by the Curiosity rover,” I said as I pointed to a picture of Curiosity.

“Ohhhh. This one! I saw this on the news,” he said and pointed to another photo.

“Yeah, that’s Starman in the Tesla Roadster, it's currently orbiting the solar system. Do you know it’s gonna be back in Earth’s orbit this August?”

“Really? That’s cool,” he genuinely looks interested in the pictures that I can’t help but feel giddy.

“This one looks like it’s from a movie,”

“Oh, that’s Starship, the one that Elon Musk is currently building. He's taking it to Mars.” I explained.

“Elon, the space guy, now I remember,” he snapped his fingers.

When his eyes traveled to the huge poster beside the board, he chuckled.

“This is so cute,”

We both looked at the poster of Neil Armstrong in his astronaut suit, but his head was replaced with my smiling face.

“Oh, Wayo did that,” I still haven’t forgiven him for ruining the poster.

“So you wanna be an astronaut? You really love spaceships,”

“Not really an astronaut, I don’t think my lanky frame was built for that. Maybe an astrophysicist or something. I’m really fascinated with outer space, the vast universe, and how much there is for humans to explore. It's really a mystery. That’s why I really want to work for NASA. That’s my dream job, I wanna go to MIT when I graduate and I-” when I realized I was babbling I closed my mouth shut.

I only really feel comfortable talking when it's about the things I am passionate about. I became such a blabbermouth and I completely forgot it was Forth that was with me.

“Sorry, you probably think it’s boring,” I lowered my head to hide my embarrassment.

Then, never in a million years I expected what happens next. He pulled me into a tight hug.

“You are amazing Beam, for sure you will become a great scientist!” he said.

“Astrophysicist,” I said through muffled voice, since my face was buried on his shoulder.

Is this really happening?

Yes, it is. We even stood there hugging for a while. Forth was holding me tight. The way his big strong arms wrapped around my body sent butterflies to my stomach. I can feel his warmth with his body so close to mine. Thereby making the room warmer until I start to feel uncomfortable.

I coughed and tried to clear my throat.

“Oh- Sorry- Sorry, I was just-” Forth said as he detached himself.

"It's okay, thanks for not teasing me," I smiled at him and tried to hide what I really feel. That I really want throw myself in his arms again.

He stood stock still for a few seconds until his lips also broke into a smile. So gorgeous.

"So uhm, room tour is over," I said.

"Yeah… So would you uhm... help me with our homework?" he asked.

"Of course," I said as we both sat on my study table and rummaged our bags for our books.

***

🏈 Forth

In my mind, I am silently cursing Math. I hate the subject with passion, but I really don't have a choice. But then tutor time won't happen if I loved the subject.

We have been studying for almost an hour now. I look at him beside me trying to explain trigonometry. Promise, I really tried my best to absorb the info and pay attention. But I was too distracted with Beam, our hug earlier, and his beautiful smile. I can't believe it and I mentally scolded myself. I was overwhelmed with his cuteness, and how he looked so happy when he talked about the things he likes. I got carried away and hugged him on impulse. Of course, I just don't go randomly hugging people, but it was my Shorty, and I never regretted it. He actually fits perfectly in my arms.

Again I tried to pay attention to whatever he was saying. But ultimately, I failed. I also failed to notice the small smile on my lips as I admire his soft delicate fingers. Holding the pen, sometimes pointing at gibberish equations, sometimes writing down notes. Even his penmanship is pretty. I really wanna know how it feels like to hold those hands, to intertwine our fingers together.

"Forth, Forth," he called me softly.

I snapped back to reality and looked at him.

"Are you okay? Do you have questions?"

"Of course, and no I don't think so," I lied.

"Alright, you can spend the next thirty minutes answering our homework. They are more or less the same with the examples," he said as he stood up and stretched.

"Okay," I said and looked at the evil questionnaire in front of me.

"I already did mine last weekend, let's compare answers when you're done," he said and sat on his bed and leaned on the headboard and then started reading a book.

"Alright," I felt defeated but I start answering the problems anyway.

Surprisingly, I didn't find them too difficult. When I encounter something, I consult Beam's notes and the examples and I immediately find the solution. However, it took me more than thirty minutes to finish everything. I stretched and turned to Beam on the bed.

Well, he was not reading anymore. He probably fell asleep while waiting for me. I stood up and walked over to sit on his bed. I observe him as he breathes calmly, eyes closed, mouth slightly open. He looked so peaceful. A smile curved on my lips. The open book was now on his lap. His glasses was askew so I reached to remove it and placed it on his bedside table.

Whoa. Without glasses I can actually see his entire face. It is angelic. That's the word. His dark brows framing his face. His thick long lashes fanning out in his beautifully closed eyes. His cute nose. His soft cherry lips. His flawless pinkish cheeks. Damn.

You are so done Forth.

I know. There is no use arguing with myself. I admit defeat. I know deep down in the corners of my mind, I am aware of what these feelings are. I like him. I really like the person sleeping in front of me. I like him a lot.

And without second thoughts I leaned over and softly placed my lips on his.