I groaned as he pumped in a second finger and I squirmed as he just watched my face.

"I'm sorry babygirl I'm trying to help you out so I don't hurt you so bad." He said and I nodded.

"Does it hurt?" He asked feeling bad.

"It pinches but it feels good." I moaned and he sucked on my inner thigh as he stared at me.

"I'm nervous." I said realizing I hadn't talked about protection with him yet and my stomach plummeted.

"We don't have to babydoll. I'm okay with what you want and need." He said removing his fingers and placing a light kiss on my thigh before kissing up my stomach and chest.

"What's up? You're worrying." He said and laid on top of me, putting his cold nose on my neck.

"We haven't talked about anything involving us having sex." I said.

"Sweetheart I will never push you to do something you don't want. I want you so bad I'm willing to wait for as long as you need." He said and I scratched his back.

My heart was saddened that I was unable to do this tonight because I'd love to but I'm scared. At the same my time body was electric as he confirmed the fact that I was in love with him.

"Are you sure you're willing to wait?" I asked.

"Of course I am Cal. I am not in this relationship simply for your body and sex. I want you I want to hold you, I want to laugh with you, help you when your sad, feed you, make you laugh and smile. Sex is a perk but it's not why I'm with you. I'm totally fine ordering an extra late snack and having you shower, wearing whatever you wish. We can talk. I want to hear what you want and need from me. I promise to understand." He kissed my jaw and I felt my eyes gloss.

"You're an amazing person Jess." I kissed his hair and he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me up.

"Do you wanna shower quickly and I'll get pizza to put in the fridge?" He smiled.

"I love cold pizza!" I smiled.

"Perfect." He kissed my lips and left me.

I sighed feeling like a disappointment. No matter the caring, loving words he spoke it's an individual thing to feel pride and I just felt not ready yet. I was okay with the touching and I loved that part but I just wanted to talk it through before I did anything major.

I showered, hopping into some sweats and a shirt.

I put my hair in a single French braid down my back and walked out seeing him pay for the pizza before shutting the door.

He walked to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, yanking me to his body.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asked.

"Let's talk about it." I kissed his nose.