"wheels up in 30." aaron hotch said, quickly walking out of the conference room. there was a certain urgency to his tone, and everyone could tell he was nervous about the case.

everyone was, in fact. the new case garcia had presented them with was unlike any that they've worked with. usually, hunting down typical serial killers was their go to. but they were now dealing with an unsub that had the ability to control and crash airplanes. the recent attack resulted in almost 151 deaths.

"this is insane." jj mumbled to herself.

"i'm not one to be a pessimist, but how the heckity honey cakes am i supposed to track down a plane hijacker??" garcia shuffled her papers around, waddling away in her 6-inch heels.

"seeing her stressed is really something else." morgan commented slyly.

"hey, how long do you think this case will take?" spencer asked rossi.

the aged man looked up. "probably a couple of days, why?"

the doctor shook his head. "just wondering."

"something rushing you home?" morgan asked. "or rather, someone?"

"fudge off." reid nudged the man, walking out of the room.

—

gracen got a text later that day, spencer telling her he'd be gone a couple of days on a case—much to gracen's disappointment. she started to understand why it would be so difficult dating someone like spencer.

but this was good. distance was good. gracen concluded last night after their little date that she'd be slowly exiting spencer's life now.

she knew it had to end sooner or later, either she leaves him now or he will later on. gracen didn't want her heart broken. she didn't want to risk spencer getting hurt, either.

gracen pieced it together when spencer told her he couldn't call her for those five months. it was his boss, most likely, that prevented him from contacting her because it'd be too dangerous. but now, things would go back to normal.

she closed her phone, not replying to spencer's text before sighing, resting her head in the palms of her hands. she felt guilty for the plan she had already established in her mind long before their date last night.

"what's up char?" marvin's voice snapped her out of her deep thoughts, and she looked up.

"yeah? nothing." gracen mumbled.

"drinks tonight?" another voice joined, and gracen saw joyce jones, one of the friends she's made at the office. the two shared a last name, but of course joyce didn't know about gracen jones. her and marvin only knew about charis johnson.

"yes. i need it." gracen said.

"i'm assuming we're not going to a gay bar?" marvin asked.

the two girls' heads snapped at him. "no." they said in unison.

"but don't worry marv, there are plenty closeted men in the dark, dreaded sea of the straights." joyce said dramatically.

"i'm absolutely not worried. i get the straights too."

—

that night, gracen downed alcohol until she was just a little tipsy, fluttering around the club like a social butterfly. with a little alcohol in her system, gracen became a new person, one that she personally liked more, because this one was less in pain, and more sociable and inviting.

gracen felt her phone buzz in her hand. her gaze went to it, but she ignored it once she saw the caller tag. it was spencer.

"you gonna pick that up?"

her gaze switched to the man that snuck into the seat next to her while she was distracted. gracen smiled lightly, shaking her head. "maybe i will later."

"i see." the man placed his chin on his palm, leaning a little into gracen. regardless of his attractiveness—the classic prince charming smile and brunette hair—she felt nothing.

"i'm charis." she said.

"baxter." his white smile only got larger, and gracen could've sworn she squinted because it got a little too bright.

"you have a hella white smile." gracen leaned in, inspecting his teeth. "oh my, what toothpaste do you use?"

"colgate." the man shrugged. "also genetics." baxter tapped on his front tooth.

gracen nodded. "huh."

"so, tell me about yourself, char."

gracen lightly flinched at the unfamiliar nickname rolling off his tongue. "oh, there's not much."

"really? tell me anyways."

the girl reluctantly told him about charis. not gracen, the one who gets kidnapped for ten years, but charis, the one who graduates from high school and college with a bachelor's degree.

the fake story rolled off her tongue so easily, as she's told the lie multiple times. charis was much happier than gracen. she was the person gracen wished she was.

—

soon enough, her and baxter were in the hallway of her apartment building, making out.

"wait, i need to open my door." gracen breathed out, before fishing through her purse and throwing the door open.

baxter tried to pick off where they left once they had stumbled in, but she quickly dodged the blue-eyed boy.

"hold on, i'm gonna clean my room for a second." she said.

"you're what?" baxter asked, clearly confused.

"it's embarrassingly messy. w-wait here." she said, before bolting to her room and shutting the door.

gracen stared at her pristine room, where not a single piece of clothing was out of place. she had started cleaning her room everyday, in case spencer had decided to visit her again. she didn't want to be caught slipping again.

she pulled out her cell phone, hands shaky from the alcohol as she dialed spencer's number. he picked up after the second ring.

"hey."

gracen felt a rush of happiness flood through her hearing his voice. "hey."

"you didn't answer my texts or calls. what's up?" spencer asked, his voice laced with concern.

"i-um, i was busy with paperwork." she felt guilty telling the blatant lie.

"okay." spencer said. "you won't believe me when i say this case—"

"charis? are you finished?" a loud voice interrupted from the other side of the bedroom door, and she silently cursed.

"y-yeah! hold on!" she yelled to baxter.

"gracen, who's that? are you home?" he asked.

she suddenly felt guilty. it's not like they were dating or anything. she was going to leave him eventually. gracen had to remind herself of these facts before answering spencer. "my friend is over. sorry, but i gotta go."

"oh, okay." spencer said. "bye."

the man quickly hung up first, and gracen suddenly felt her heart wrench. she went over, flinging the door open to reveal an intoxicated baxter.

he went to her first, grabbing her waist and pressing a bunch of kisses down her jaw. gracen gave not a single ounce of reaction, suddenly not feeling him anymore. she just couldn't stop thinking about spencer.

"hey, baxter—" she sighed as he pulled away from her.

"yeah?" he asked.

"let's not do this." gracen said. "sorry. i'm tired."

the man let out a sigh, his arms dropping from her waist. "of course. i won't make you do anything, charis." he reached up, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. she smiled softly, glad that there was some chivalry left in the world. on any other occasion, gracen would find this guy exactly her type.

but spencer. spencer was her type now. she would just have to wait it out until the feelings disappeared.

baxter ended up staying a little longer, as they ordered some takeout and ate silently at her dinner table. "so, that guy you were talking to on the phone. is he the reason?"

gracen let a small sigh escape her lips. "i don't want to talk about it."

"okay."

"it's—it's one of those things where i know i shouldn't, but can't help it." she said. "one of those situations."

"so you resorted to sleeping with other guys to compensate?"

gracen felt fully attacked at his accurate guess, her jaw dropping. "how'd you guess???"

"law major." baxter said. "it's not that hard to read people."

she chuckled, nodding. "it's wrong, isn't it?"

he shrugged. "if i were him, i'd be really hurt."

a pang erupted in her chest. "ouch." she said sheepishly.

"sorry. i'm a little blunt." he chuckled. "but, if the feeling's mutual, there shouldn't be anything stopping you guys."

gracen nodded. except for a cold blooded serial killer who's murdered over 20 people.

"but i'm in no position to give advice." baxter said, chuckling as he stood up from the chair. "i should really get going now."

"okay. thanks for having dinner with me." gracen said.

"yeah. thanks for staying." she said, forcing a smile as he walked out her apartment.

it was eerily quiet as she got up to lock the door, sighing as she stepped outside onto her mini balcony, lighting a cigarette. the smoke filled her lungs before gracen exhaled, feeling a little more alive than before.

the feeling of truly being alive was something she only felt when she was with spencer.

—