《If We Were in The Cars Movie (COMPLETED)》The Sheriff
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The two girls were driving down a barren road they stumbled across, hoping it led to somewhere with someone who can help them. "We've been driving forever..." Ivy groaned, making Grace raise a lid "We've been on this road for like 10 minutes."
"I KNOW BUT IT FEELS LIKE FOREVERRRRR!" Ivy growled making Grace roll her eyes and chuckle "I know Ivy but we have to keep walking....or...driving..." Grace said with a blank face "Yeah, it's going to take a while for us to get used to our car bodies."
As Grace chuckled, Ivy realized something..."You know Grace...your voice sounds...how do I put it...older..." Ivy said, making Grace's eyes widen a bit "I do sound a bit different don't I?" Grace asked, listening to her voice...it did sound a bit more gruff than usual.
"Yeah, maybe since you're a old car you gained some years." Ivy said with a snort making Grace glare at her with a blank stare "YOU A BOOMER LOL!" Ivy yelled as Grace continued to glare at her "WHY YOU BULLY ME?!" Grace yelled sadly making Ivy's face go blank "Sowwy."
Grace's sad expression turned to a smile in a second "I forgive you!" Grace exclaimed making Ivy chuckled. When Ivy looked to the side she stopped chuckling "Look!"
Grace looked over at where Ivy was looking to see a familiar sign "Welcome to Radiator Springs! Gateway to Ornament Valley!" Grace read excitedly "WOO! Radiator Springs is just up ahead! Maybe they can help us!" Ivy cheered "Let's go!"
Grace then sped off "WOAH!" She yelled at the sudden speed making Ivy giggle "GET BACK HERE!" Ivy yelled zooming after the pink hudson hornet. The Camry's engine revving woke up a certain someone that was resting beside the sign.
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The police car jumped awake "Huh?" The police car looked around the scene "WOOOHOOO!" He jumped then looked down the road to see two cars speeding towards the town "Not in my town you don't!"
The police car turned on his sirens then began to speed after the two cars. As the two cars were hooting and laughing Ivy looked through her rear view mirror to see a police car starting to catch up to them "Grace! We got company!"
Grace jumped as she began to hear the sirens "Oh shoot! I totally forgot about Sheriff! We need to pull over!" Grace yelled, making Ivy nod her front side. At the same time the two cars slammed on their breaks making Sheriff start to slow down.
When the two went to a complete stop Sheriff pulled up beside the two "Do you two know how fast you were going?" Sheriff asked as the two looked down at the floor "No..." Grace mumbled as Ivy sighed "Give us a break...There weren't any speed limit signs!"
"I-..." Sheriff went silent for a second "Well your right about that...we should really put some signs up." Sheriff said, making Ivy smirk "See?" Ivy asked as Grace chuckled.
Sheriff sighed "Okay, okay...I'll let you ladies off with a warning." Sheriff said, making Grace smile "Thank you officer it won't happen again." Grace thanked as Ivy rolled her eyes.
"So...where are you ladies heading?" Sheriff asked, "We're heading to Radiator Springs." Ivy answered beginning to drive down the road with Grace by her side "Really? Well everyone's gonna be ecstatic when you two arrive."
"Really? Why's that?" Grace asked even though she already knew why "Well we haven't had customers in years." Sheriff answered "Really? Well I'm sure we can help but...we don't have any money..." Ivy said awkwardly "Yeah...you see we...just woke up in the desert..."
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Sheriff raised a lid "What?! You just randomly woke up in the desert?" Sheriff asked in disbelief "Yeah that's what she said." Ivy said with a blank face "I know it sounds stupid...Do you think anyone could hook us up with a place to stay?" Grace asked.
"Yeah, I'm sure Sally can let you stay in two of the cones." Sheriff answered "Great! Let's get going!"
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Badass
At the end of everything, Taylor Hebert realized something. She didn't want to be a superhero. No, she wanted to be a badass. And then her prayers were answered. Imbued with the power of mimetic badassery and the ability to channel a different real-life badass every week, she set out in search for all the best things in life - well, according to Conan, at least. Modeling herself after Conan have been a mistake. Join her on her high-octane, pulp-fiction journey for vengeance, adventure, victory and mayhem. This isn't just uncensored. It's anti-censored! =========================== (Worm/Fate/Badass of the Week) Warning: crack-taken-seriously, over-the-top pulp-fiction style violence, overpowered protagonist, banned on two other sites. Hell, even the light-hearted omake jokes in this were considered too subversive to persist. ============================ AN: There’s this really, really excellent website called Badass of the Week. I’ve wasted many an hour browsing through, marveling at all the crazy shit some humans are capable of. Check it out, then come back and read this in a few days when the awesome starts to wear off. It’s worth it (all 576 entries). Back? Good! Anyways, I was looking through it recently while thinking about who I wanted to make expy’s of for my The Flying Dutchman quest ship captains (which now languishes in indefinite hiatus), and I had this idea. What if Taylor, wanting to be a badass, triggered with the power to be a different Badass every week? With a bit of Fate-style ability to draw on the tools associated with the legend (but to a just marginally less ridiculous degree), and a drive and aura to be and do badass? And thus, Badass was born in it’s somewhat cracky glory. Enjoy.
8 188You Only Smol Twice: A Smol Detective Story
This is a fanfic set in the universe of They Are Smol, a delightful series of stories by TinyPrancingHorse which you should totally go and read. It’s the third in my own series about a human investigator in a galaxy full of aliens who are much bigger and stronger than any human. Obviously, there are plenty of spoilers for the previous two stories in here so consider yourself warned. After many successful investigations, Oscar Williams has his loyalty to his adopted alien family sorely tested. What appears to be a simple theft turns out to be anything but, and to capture the perpetrators Oscar might just have to betray his own species… Formal Disclaimer: I do not take credit for the original setting, this story is set in an alternate version of the 'They are Smol' universe, written by the one, the only TinyPrancingHorse TPH takes many forms and is known by many names. He is like Nyarlathotep, only smaller and cuter and more prancey. TPH also has a website should you require more Smol Shenanigans in your life. Which you do, so get over there and read it. The cover art for this is courtesy of Firebane.
8 187The Blackgloom Bounty
In the dark days before the end of the first millennium, Scotland (or Scotia as some called it) was a leaderless hodgepodge of tribes, clans and warring factions all bent on the same thing--domination of the land. Wizards, sorcerers and magicians still plied their trade, though much of their power had given way to the machinations of men and their war machines. To the south of Scotia lay the realm of the Saxons ruled by Ethelred the Unready and his ruthless minions. To the west, Ireland had just come of age. Everywhere else the constant threat of a lightning swift Viking incursion loomed over the land.Growing up in this lawless world is a displaced Daynin McKinnon, heir to an ancient familial keep on the island of Rhum. He and his grandfather Ean scratch out a living amongst the Saxons, careful never to divulge their clan heritage. That all changes when Kruzurk Makshare chooses Daynin as the ideal prospect to help him bring down a vile sorcerer named The Seed of Cerberus, ferreted away in his impregnable fortress at Blackgloom. Little does Kruzurk know that in so doing, he will launch young Daynin, himself and others on a vast, dangerous quest that no one could have foreseen. *****One Hollywood producer has dubbed this three book fantasy epic from Jon Baxley as, "BRAVEHEART meets THE LORD OF THE RINGS." Real places, people and events flesh out this fast moving, multi-faceted semi-historical series but fear not fantasy readers. There's more than enough of the magical, mystical mayhem you have come to expect from great fantasy. Romance readers, too, will enjoy the 'spice' in these characters--and there are a lot of them--both human and otherwise. And if you're into Viking lore, this series certainly is for you.When someone asks the author about his series, he answers with, “There were far more surprises in this tale than I ever expected and it's not over yet! This volume and the next two contain hundreds of pages filled with rollicking good times, fast moving action and a page turning adventure you will not soon forget."Books In The Scythian Stone Saga:THE BLACKGLOOM BOUNTY Episode 1 - 500 pagesTHE REGENTS OF RHUM Episode 2 - 800 pagesTHE SCIONS OF SCOTIA Episode 3 - 800 pages
8 142daydreaming, dreamwastaken x oc
in which a twitch streamer calls dream a dick ironically and starts ww3 on twitter (cover art by qyukie on twitter)
8 167Promise I can change your mind GxG
Kya has always been the classic 'good girl' but when her best friend Bri encourages her to step out of her shell things get kinda wild.
8 205FEMALE FACECLAIMS √√
For those of you in search of the perfect female faceclaims for your characters, this is the book for you.
8 207