A few weeks had passed by. Fortunately, it had been easy to pretend the whole thing was just a dream. Kikyo was too busy and too stressed with her pregnancy to take care of Killua, so you had him most of the day and night. You carried him in a sling most of the time, but Illumi often asked to hold him in between training sessions. You could tell it was killing him to not treat Killua as his son, but it helped that he could at least love him as a brother. Today, as Illumi held Killua, you noticed that he was whispering gently to the baby as he stroked his soft, white hair.

"What do you say to him when you talk?" You asked quietly.

"I tell him how I will teach him to be a great leader and assassin. That I will protect him as he learns."

"When does he begin assassination training?"

"Around one year of age we begin poison tolerance training. That will be particularly difficult for you I assume. He will be very ill, but highly unlikely to pass away. Hopefully that brings you some comfort." He stood and motioned to return Killua to you as he had begun fussing for food. "Here, he seems hungry. I will let you have privacy." He began to leave, but you grabbed his sleeve.

"You don't have to go Illu..." You whispered, holding back tears in your eyes. He turned to look at you, placing a hand on your arm. He looked you in the eyes, retaining his blank expression but allowing you a glace at what seemed to be sincere sadness in his eyes.

"For now, I do YN..." He glanced up to the corner of the room; there was likely a camera there. He stood back up and turned to exit the room. "And it's Illumi-sama to you."

Nodding and wiping a tear away, you sat down to feed Killua. Your compliance had once again left you in a place you didn't want to be. Not that you had much choice this time around. You certainly weren't going to defeat the entire Zoldyck family any time soon, so you simply had to obey. And it wasn't too hard to complete the task assigned to you. However, you did wonder how it would go when you had two infants to take care of. Like twins I guess. You thought to yourself. I can probably handle twins. And for just a moment, you allowed yourself to slip into the fantasy of how you had wanted your life to go. Being much, much older, having babies with someone you loved, being able to hear them call you mama. It was an enjoyable thought that ended when Kikyo came into the room.

"I'd like to spend time with him, once you are finished. Please straighten up the playroom while I do so."

"Yes, Kikyo-sama."

"And LN-san?"

"Yes, Kikyo-sama?"

"When Killu begins speaking, make sure to have him call you YN-san. We don't want any confusion around who is who to him."

"...Yes, Kikyo-sama." You handed Killua to her and exited the room. I can find a way around that. He can at least have a special name for me. And so you left the room, plotting.