tommy leans back in his chair, his jaw on the floor. i giggle violently as texts start rolling in from lindsay.

WTAF????

YOU HOSTED TOMMYINNIT?

I MEAN I KINDA PREDICTED THIS BUT STILL

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU

THAT HEARTFELT INTERVIEW SPEECH DIDN'T MEAN SHIT????

YOU'RE INSANE

IS THIS THE END OF OUR FRIENDSHIP???

TURN OFF YOUR GOD DAMN RINGER I CAN HEAR MY TEXTS COMING IN ON THE STREAM

LOOK AT HOW SAD YOU MADE HIM

SHAME ON YOU, VALERIE AMELIE DAVIS!

i laugh while reading the texts. i look back up at tommy and feel a slight twinge of guilt. he's sitting in the same position, mouth agape, but now he looks disappointed. he quickly snaps out of it when he catches me staring.

"fuck you," tommy says while laughing, a hint of sadness in his voice. "i thought you were different. all women do is lie. i'm going dark on twitter now." i laugh.

"whoops," i say.

"i'm more shocked than anything," tubbo says. "i thought there was a much greater chance you picked love."

"same. i'm disgusted," wilbur says jokingly.

"valerie, valerie, valerie," austin says. "this is the letdown of the century. the chat's going wild."

"'valerie' is trending on twitter worldwide, as well," wilbur says. "i can only imagine what those tweets look like."

"i'm one step ahead of you," tubbo says. he starts reading the tweets.

VALERIE WAS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE

this is the worst day of my life #valerie #loveorhost

ayo at least #valerie is still available. i call dibs.

smh #valerie

AND TO THINK I WAS ROOTING FOR VALERIE THE WHOLE TIME

remember valerie's interview? IT WAS ALL A LIE

valerie wth i was already shipping #talerie this is unfair

"damn, valerie, looks like you broke more than tommy's heart," austin says.

"i mean... come on austin..." i say, smirking.

"uh huh," he says. i can hear a smile in his voice. "chat, tommy, i have something i need to announce."

"what is it?" tommy asks, no enthusiasm present in his voice. "i stayed up until three in the fucking morning just to get hosted, so whatever you are about to tell me better be good."

"oh, it's good alright." austin crinkles a piece of paper.

"make more noises with that damn paper and see what happens," wilbur threatens. i laugh.

"the thing is, tommy..." austin inhales quickly. "THAT WAS A PRANK!"

tommy's eyes shoot up from the ground to the screen.

"what?" he asks a few seconds later.

"VALERIE DIDN'T CHOOSE HOST, THAT WAS A PRANK! VALERIE ACTUALLY CHOSE LOVE!" austin yells. him and doc start clapping. tommy's jaw falls to the floor again.

"deadass?" tommy asks.

"deadass," austin confirms. tommy looks over at me. we both have huge grins plastered on our faces.

"i don't believe it," tommy says with a chuckle, shaking his head.

"i'll prove it! hang on!" austin pulls up a screenshot of our discord dm's.

- would it be okay if we pulled a prank on tommy?

depends on what you mean by prank

i'm gonna tell him you chose host

oh jeez, you'll eventually tell him i actually chose love though, right?

yeah of course! just a fun little steve harvey moment. i want to see how he reacts LOL

okay sounds good HAHA i can't wait to see his reaction

"oh shit," tommy says happily. "SHE CHOSE LOVE!"

"TOMMYINNIT WON LOVE OR HOST!" tubbo shouts.

"TOMMYINNIT FOUND A GIRLFRIEND!" wilbur exclaims, matching tubbo's enthusiasm.

"YOU'RE MY GIRLFRIEND!" tommy shouts at me. i cover my mouth as i giggle.

"i believe this means you two have a date to get to," austin says. my eyes widen.

"huh?" i ask.

"forgot you're a newbie to this stuff." austin chuckles. "since you two won love or host, the next step is to go on your first date."

"doesn't he live a 13 hour flight away?" this makes austin laugh harder.

"you guys aren't seeing each other in person. it's an online date that tommy will stream." tommy nods.

"a minecraft date," tommy says. i smile. that sounds like fun.

"oh okay, cool," i say.

"tommy, are you streaming yet?" austin asks.

"about to. i'm getting everything set up," he responds. my phone starts chiming again, and i turn the ringer off.

"my god valerie, who is blowing up your phone?" austin asks.

"is there a guy i don't know about?" tommy adds in. i laugh.

"my friends are blowing up my phone, sorry," i say.

"what are they saying?" austin asks.

"at first they were screaming and bashing me for 'choosing host.' but now everyone's congratulating me. oh, and my friend lindsay says hi."

"hi lindsay!" tommy and austin both say enthusiastically. lindsay immediately texts me lots of keyboard smashes after that.

"it's up, austin," tommy says.

"alright, folks, that's it then. we're going to raid tommyinnit and you guys can watch his stream with the winner of his love or host, valerie. that's it for our show everyone, see you next time!" i can hear austin playing his outro love or host music, and i can picture the chat saying goodbye.

"what's your discord, val?" tommy asks. "i'm gonna call you on there."

"it's valerie, lowercase v, and the numbers are ####," i respond. tommy nods and i immediately get a friend request from him. i accept.

"let's do this," he says.