Heisenberg's POV

"Mother Miranda, you can't seriously expect Heisenberg to take care of the child."

"For once I agree with this bitch, you can't possibly expect ME to take care of that...that thing." I look down at the child in disgust. The only thing that looked even remotely unnatural about the kid, were the telltale scars from implanting cadou.

"My decision is final. Heisenberg will take care of the child, as he will benefit the most from it."

A small grimace crept onto my face. What the fuck was I supposed to do with a child? I have work that needs to be done and children will get in the way.

"What the fuck does the child even do?" Everyone was thinkin' it, I just said it.

Miranda let out a loud sigh. "That is for you to find out, but I assure you, it will be of use." I fucking hate when she withholds information.

I grabbed the child by the foot and pulled it out of the cradle. It dangled pathetically from my hand.

"And what is this thing called?" The child started making an annoying screeching sound, as it hung. I sat it back down, incase it self-combusted.

"The village mortals called it (Y/N). Though you may call the child whatever may please you." I nodded as Miranda dismissed us. Luckily the cradle was made of metal so I didn't have to touch the child.

We finally got back to my factory after a slight detor through a village house. I put the child down in the back of my workplace and left to get my welding tools.

After a couple of hours I almost finished my newest project, adding more armor on a soldat zwei, to protect it's reactor. I just had to fix one more wire...

"Achoo!"

My tools slipped out of my hands causing the wire to snap. "Shit."

"You. Fucking. BITCH!-" I slammed my hands onto the table and got up-"Hours of fucking work ruined by a fucking child."

The child was screaming again.

"Shut the fuck up.-" I sat back down still pissed.-"I fucking hate babies."

Everything went quiet, which made me sigh of relief.

"Finally, thank you."

"You're welcome."

I swear I have never turned around as fast. Crouched behind the cradle was a child who looked about eight, I could only see the kid's head though.

"Where the fuck did you come from?!" I grabbed my hammer off the table and stood up.

"I was already here. You said 'I fucking hate babies' so I'm not a baby anymore. Sorry about your metal thingy."

"First off, don't say 'fucking' you're a child. Second, what the fuck."

"I could try to explain some stuff to you, but I would prefer if I had some clothes it's chilly in here. It turns out when I grow my clothes don't grow with me." That would explain them hiding behind the cradle...

I set my hammer down on the table again and went down the hall to my quarters. I really didn't expect this at all. Also how the fuck would this 'benefit' me. I fucking hate Miranda...

I searched for the smallest set of clothes and brought them out. They would still be way to big on the kid, but it would have to work.

"Alright kid, I got some clothes. They're gonna be too big, but they're the best I got." I opened the door to my workplace and found the kid sitting in the same place as when I left. "I'll just leave these here and wait in the hall."

After a couple minutes I heard the kid's tiny voice say they were done, and went back inside.

The kid was sitting criss-cross in the middle of the floor... with my hat on.

"No. Absolutely not." I pulled the hat off and put it on my head instead. "No one, and I mean no one, touches the hat."

"You touched it."

"It's my hat. I do what I want with it." I don't know what I hated more. The kid screaming or talking, each option was horrible.

I heard a huff and looked back over. The kid had their arms crossed and a pouty expression.

"What do you want?"

"The hat." I shook my head. "Fine, I want an apology."

Now I was even more confused. "An apology? Why the fuck do you need an apology?"

"You yelled at me earlier because I sneezed. It's either an apology or the hat." I definitely hate this kid talking more...

"I'm sorry. Now could you tell me how you did the whole aging thing?" I was getting impatient now.

"Nope."

"What?! I apologized!" I slammed my hammer on that table. This is why I never wanted kids.

"You didn't mean it. If you are gonna apologize you have to mean it. Either do it again or give me the hat." I clenched my jaw as a stared down at the little child.

"I'm not going to apologize twice to a child for the same thing."

The kid got up to stare at me. I was almost tempted to help them up, as they were having a difficult time with the thick layers of clothing.

"Apologize or give me the hat."

I stared off into the corner not wanting to look at that annoying creature anymore. The kid barely came up to my cadou scars, yet they were still determined into making me feel small.

"This-this will be the ONLY time you get my hat." Immediately the kids face lit up. They reached their hands up to grab it before it even came off my head. I couldn't even see the kid's hands because the coat was so long. They placed it on their head and looked up at me.

They looked like a miny me, without a cigar and obviously a giant hammer.

"Can we go see that doll lady? Or the tall one?" Damnit this kid is so needy, but... I could drop them off with the super-sized bitch and her daughters. Maybe then I could finish my work.

"Yeah we'll go and see the tall bitch." I said with a huge grin on my face.

"Tall bitch..."

"Don't say that word either." I yelled over my shoulder, already on my way out.

"When are we gonna get there? My feet hurt. We've been walking forever." I sighed and turned around, almost causing us to collide.

"Quit your whining. We've only been walking for fifteen minutes and we're almost there." With this the kid somehow got a new burst of energy and rushed ahead. Almost tripping on their clothes.

We finally made it to the fucking castle and we knocked on the door. Normally I wouldn't knock but last time I almost got my whole fucking arm cut off, so I decided to be polite.

I heard a few voices inside, but none of them were as loud as the footsteps from the super-sized bitch herself.

The tall bitch opened the door and I could feel the kid hide behind me a little.

"Heisenberg. What do you want?" I took a little step back, I didn't have my stool or that moronic freak to step on so I had to bend my neck to look at her.

"I brought the kid over for a little... play date." I tried to push the kid out from behind me but they didn't move.

"The child is nothing more than a baby. My daughters would not be suitable candidates for a play date. However, I bet Donna and Angie would be delighted. Good day."

"I-I'm not a baby anymore. And my- my name's (Y/N)."

The child had come out from behind me, though they were still holding my coat.

"Hahaha. You've got to be kidding me. This has got to be a joke. Where's the real kid."

"It's the same fucking kid bitch. Now are you gonna let us in or not. I'll explain everything inside. Well everything that I understand..."

She let out a sigh and opened the door again. We walked in and I made myself at home.

"Mother who is it?" Bela asked coming down the main stairs followed by Cassandra and Daniela. These kids may be annoying, but nothing they do is even half as bad as this kid.

"Uncle Heisenberg!" The three girls say in unison. I let out a little chuckle.

"Hey girls, I brought you someone to play with."

"Oooh is it a man-thing? I love those they taste so delicious." I heard (Y/N) squeak and hide behind the couch I was sitting on.

"No Cass, you can't eat them. I brought the kid Miranda told me to take care of." All the girls sighed and looked miserable until I felt the kid creep out from behind me. All their attitudes changed.

"Aww their so cuteee." Dani said rushing over to play with the kids hair.

"What's your name? You're so small!" Cass knelt in front of the kid and started fixing their clothes.

"It's (Y/N)." They squeaked

"Cassandra? Dani? What if we give (Y/N) a makeover. Obviously Uncle Heisenberg didn't have any clothes that fit them." All the girl stopped for a second before huge grins spread across their faces. The last thing I saw was the scared face of the kid being dragged of to probably the dressing room.

"So... Heisenberg. How did the child, sorry (Y/N), grow from a baby to a small child in the last five hours?"

"I don't really know... all I know is that they can change their age on command. I was complaining about babies and stuff... then I turned around and there sat an eight year-old. Now that I think about it I hate small children more than I hate actual babies."

She took a puff of her cigarette before laughing. "Of course you were complaining. I knew you wouldn't be able to handle a child."

I started to stare daggers at her until Dani came flying in and stopped right in front of us.

"M-Mother come quick! (Y/N) grew!"

Note from Author

Thanks for reading, I've been waiting to write this for a hot second. I'm trying to write more since it's the summer and I'm not in school anymore, so I'm going to try to write more than 1500 words each chapter. If there are any spelling mistakes feel free to comment them, and I'll me happy to fix them. Don't feel like your being harsh or rude I'm grateful for anyone willing to help my writing. Also if the characters don't seem canon enough I'll be happy to tweak them.

Sincerely your Author :)

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