My doctor told me I am bad at dealing with what's new to me

And proceeded to tell me not to reveal all of myself at once

Words that have so many meanings

And I know she is right

That is why I have always stoped and ran away from every relationship before it has started

Then you came along

And I felt like you were worth running to

Instead of away from

I think the reason I feel like I am going insane

Is that feeling grownup is new to me

Feeling love for someone is new to me

And feeling this way is new and overwhelming to me

I have never found someone so extremely pretty in a way that meant

I wanted to be as close as physically possible

I really meant it when I say I am asexual

But now I know why a spectrum exists

Because after 19 years of existence I am laying in my room

Thinking about you and how much I like you as a person and my friend

And love you as my partner

But also that you are so overwhelmingly beautiful

I might die

Madeleine