My heart was beating fast, my fingers curling up as my breathing grows heavy.

"What?" I manage to whisper, my voice cracking and filling with increasing anger and hurt.

They never killed grandma.

Heidi stares at me, sorrowfully.

She died four months ago.

"I'm so sorry, Layla." She whispers, standing up.

Why the hell was she telling me this now? After all those years...

As the information fully begins to settle in, my vision begins to blur, my breaths increasing audibly and I try to calm myself down.

But fail. As I watch Heidi approach me from around the table.

"Don't come near me." I spat out, but she continues to walk towards me.

"I SAID DONT COME NEAR ME!" I scream, finally losing my shit and she jumps, stopping in her tracks.

"I-I can explain, please.." she stutters glancing at the open door with a nervous look.

"I'm sick of your excuses!" I snap, hitting my fist against the table. "How can you possibly explain this? You knew how much she meant to me!" My voice grows louder again, a thick tear rolling down my cheek, feeling like my heart had been stabbed.

"I-I..." She trails off, her mouth opening and closing as her eyes fill up with guilt, clearly loss for words and I release a sob.

"How can you keep this from me? After eight years..." My voice cracks, anger boiling once again as I stare at her speechless face.

"HOW COULD YOU?" I yell and she jumps again, lowering her gaze.

"You knew all along. That was the plan, right? You say you're sorry, if you were you would've told me–"

"Don't talk to her like that." I hear a snappy voice cut me off, and I crane my neck, my gaze meeting mums cold ones as she steps into the kitchen.

"Shut your mouth." I spit out, as dad enters glaring at Heidi, they both had clearly heard everything.

"Why did you tell her?" He snaps at her, his eyes narrowing. "I clearly told you not–"

"SHUT UP!" I scream at him, feeling so hurt as I glare at him. Another tear rolling down my cheek, as I begin to tremble with rage.

"How could you do that to me? How sick are you guys to make me think you had fucking killed her for all these wasted years?!" I continue to scream.

"No one said we killed her. Its just what your dumb brain thought." Mum snaps back. "We actually just drugged her and sent her here in America with one of my good relatives. You actually thought I'd kill my own mother?" She spits, her cheeks reddening with anger.

My heart clenched painfully as I release an angry sob. "Why?" I grit out, my voice cracking.

"Why? Because she was better here rather than there with no company. I was always busy with my own family, thought she could be happier here." She glares at me, gaining pleasure from the pain from my eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I sob again. "At least before she died so I could've seen her one last time." My voice kept cracking as the pain was beginning to grow unbearable.

It hurt so much that I didn't know about this. All the years I could've spent with her. My life would be so different right now if I did move in with her. I'd be happier. Not weak.

"Oh shut up, Layla." Mum spits, anger now flaring in her eyes. "You were always a burden to her, shoving your pathetic problems to her every time she came over. She was old already, probably would've died within ten minutes of you being there–"

Her words pricked my alright tearing heart and I release a sob.

"Shut up!" I shout, feeling a vein pop through my forehead. "I hate you so much! what kind of mum are you!? complaining about how I am and was when it was you who brought me up like this!" My voice grows louder again and I release another sob, while she scoffs and I continue.

"You always treated me horrible for no reason!" My breath hitches. "Ever since I was seven you–"

"Oh hunny." She suddenly cuts me off, barking out a laugh.

"I've always hated you. Ever since you were born." Her voice is so full of venom and hate. "I never failed to show it. Your dumb brain just realised it up to that age." She gives me a crooked smirk, then turning her head to dad, her green orbs turning thunderous, but her smirk doesn't falter.

"For your dad on the other hand..." She runs her tongue over her teeth as dad glares at her, warningly.

"Oh c'mon Gerald. I think she ought to know it now." She lets out a spiteful chuckle, grinding her teeth.

Dad's grey eyes land on me again, his jaw clenching tightly as I see him gulp visibly.

When silence settles between us mum lets out a scoff. Gazing back at me, as she straightens herself up, crossing her arms.

"Your dad was actually very fond of you when you were young as you possibly know it. And perhaps didn't realise my own hateful behaviour towards you until he had turned against you, too." She starts, chuckling emptily.

"All in the persuasion of me of course." She then says, staring me through my eyes, watching the tears slide down. Every word coming out of her mouth hurting so bad, confusion in mixture of the pain. Why?

"I persuaded him to make your life a misery. And succeeded when you were around seven." She chuckles again, her eyes shining icily.

Dad's hands ball up, as his nostrils begin to flair, watching as she continues to spill out words.

"It disgusted me how nicely you were treated, cuz you didn't deserve it, and so I had a chat with him one night, settled something and he agreed to make your life a living he–"

"Enough, Luise." Dad finally barks out, and her smirk only grows. Something else laced in her emotions.

After another moment of silence a shaky breath escapes from my tear stricken lips.

"I don't get it.." my voice comes out hoarse and cracky, as a few more tears slip from my eyes as I stare into mums eyes. "Why? Why do you hate me? I'm your daughter, how can you–" she cuts me off with a loud scoff.

"I can't take it anymore. Tell her Gerald!" Mum spat out, like my words disgusted her, and my eyes narrow.

"No." Dad spits back and mum clenches her fists, whipping her head to me again, her hateful gaze locking with mine and then she blurts with utter disgust.

"You are not my daughter, Layla."

My breath hitches, as I practically freeze up with intense shock, my heart stopping.

What?...

The whole room becomes deadly silent and mum lets out a sigh of relief.

As if she had lifted out a heavy weight from her chest.

"W-What are you saying?" I soon break the silence, my voice coming out as a mere whisper, my head beginning to throb, tears running down my cheeks and my heart now picking up its pace as it pounds against my chest.

I was confused. Angry. Apart of me thinking she's lying...

I glance up at her, seeing her face deadly serious, my eyes wandering over to dad's who had a guilty look.

And after another moment of silence it was enough to say they weren't lying.

"You guys aren't my real parents.." I whisper out in pain, my eyes squinting as tears dribble down. My eyes wander over to Heidi who looked equally shocked as me.

She wasn't even my real sister.

My legs begin to tremble and I hold onto the table for support, holding back my sobs.

I'm with a bunch of strangers.

My whole life has been a lie.

"Actually." Dad's deep voice calls out and I glance up at him through foggy eyes, watching as his eyes fill up with guilt and he gulps.

"I...I am your real father."

Another wave of shock hits me and I take a step back. "What?"

This was all getting too much for me now. Pain, shock, pain, shock. It kept repeating. What else have they been hiding from me?

The pieces begin to fit together in my mind and a weird sound comes out from my mouth, a mixture of a sob and a loud breath.

I was so disgusted.

Because..

"I am a product of an affair." The words spill from my mouth as a statement, so full with hurt and disgust.

Dad tenses up, and tears his gaze away from me, looking uncomfortable.

Meanwhile, mums gaze is full of rage. And after some silence she speaks, tensely. "He had an affair when Heidi was just one years old." She confirms, her voice coming out sharply causing dad to flinch.

I shake my head, letting out another weird sound. A sound of pain. By now my heart was aching surreally. Like it had been stabbed multiple times, tearing and ripping apart with every word they said.

My breathing increased and I hold onto my chest, shaking my head again.

I look towards Heidi who's sobbing silently. Her hand cupping her mouth. All this was news to her too.

I let out a breath trying to calm myself down and shut my eyes. Too much..

My mind was all over the place, so full of pain I felt like it was going to burst.

I got what I wanted. The reason why they always hated me. But the truth hurt. So much.

And then a thought crosses my mind, and my eyes flash open.

"Grandma-Grandma, she isn't-wasn't even my real g-grandma." The words escape shakily from my lips, breaking the silence as a tear slips down.

Mum lets out another sigh.

"Oh, but she is.." she whispers.

Her eyes looked tired, so full of anger and hurt as she gazes back at me with a lazy false smile, her eyes bloodshot.

"The affair took place in no other but my sister's house.."

And again. Another bomb had exploded within me. Fuck.

That's so..

That's fucking sick...

God my life was a nutshell.

"I found out a few days before she passed... just an hour after she had given birth to you." She whispers, her mind drifting off. "Stella. Her name's Stella. Your real mother." And just like that she snaps out of it and gives me an icy glare.

"I'd say karma sure hit her real good." She spits out in disgust which causes dad to jump into life.

"Enough Luise." He barks out at her, and she purses lips, looking so pained as she turns her gaze to his.

"She killed her. Not me, so don't you dare yell at me like I did the wrong!" She spits out, her eyes flaming again.

"Although I wonder how since she was born so prematurely." Her voice turned to a mocking tone as she slits her eyes at me.

But I could still see it. Behind her tears and hatred she showed towards me and my mother.

I still saw the love she still had for her sister. She missed her yet hated her at the same time for what she did.

I look away, looking down at the Weetabix that had now turned into hard looking porridge, a hicup releasing from my lips, the sobs had stopped, but the tears continued rolling down.

A feeling of hollowness and emptiness had settled inside of my throbbing chest.

But then mum– or should I say aunt, continues to spit out the cruel words she always had pleasure in torturing me with.

"I despised you ever since you were born. For killing my sister. For ruining my fucking life–"

But then dad suddenly cuts her off, angrily.

"Enough, Luise." He snaps again. And mum lets out an angry pained sob.

"Oh, shut up, Gerald!" She snaps at him, whipping her head to him.

"Times like these it almost seems like you still love Stella more than me!" Her voice raises.

"Stop this bullshit!" He yells louder, balling his hands up. "You're being so pathetic right now, do you even hear yourself?" His voice booms through the walls.

Everything was a mess. And tonight, not only was my life crushed with this new information but their relationship was also pushed at the brink.

All because of me.

"You know, Gerald. I think you're lying to me! You told me it was nothing and yet you always snap at me when I talk about her, what is this?" She yells louder, and my eyes fall closed as I take a deep breath, my head pounding harder.

"Stop it." I speak out, my hands tightening around the table as my breathing grows heavy.

"Luise shut up! We aren't discussing this now!" Dad continues to yell.

"You always say that!" She screams back. "What is it, Gerald? Do you not love me anymore?! Is that it!?"

I grip my head, panting heavily.

"Layla?" I hear a soft voice next to me as footsteps stop to my side. A hand touching my shoulder.

"No, don't touch me!" I spit out in a shaky cracky voice, shrugging her off, as I look into the eyes of my half sister half cousin, her cheeks smeared with tears and mascara.

The door creaks open, and the whole room goes quiet apart from me, the small sobs and whimpers escaping my lips as my constricting lungs begin to close up.

I couldn't breathe..

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