《His [COMPLETED]》(33) To make it.
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A knock on the door woke me up. The knock sounded urgent.
I rolled back into my pillow and sighed. My face felt tired and disgusting and I knew I looked like shit.
I waited for my father to get the door, but after a couple of minutes and annoying urgent knocks, I realised he was most probably somewhere else.
I groaned before sitting up straighter. My head throbbed and I put one of my hands to my head.
I rolled out of bed and dragged myself to the door. I then trudged downstairs. I passed the mirror on the side, and cringed at the reflection.
The knock sounded again, however, and I put the thought of me looking disgusting to the back of my mind as I walked to the door.
As soon as I opened the door and the cold air hit my blotchy and tired looking face, the voice that came out sounded desperate and pleading.
"You've got to help him," Kyle's mum came in to view and my heart started to beat faster and faster.
"What?" I let out. I was starting to panic and it was silly of me really.
"You need to help him," her face was full of concern and her eyes were almost welled up with tears. "He's uncontrollable, he's going crazy and I don't know how to stop him, he needs you, Cali, he won't listen to me," she let out fastly as her eyes pleaded with mine.
"I'll come over," I had to. I needed to help him. I didn't hesitate to slam the door and walk fastly to Kyle's house, hot on Kyle's mum's tail.
As soon as she opened the door, the sound of crashing and thumping made it's way to my ears. It made my heart jump and my body to flinch slightly.
"He's going crazy, please help him," I nodded my head and made my way upstairs.
The crashing became louder and I wanted to run away, but Kyle needed me and I was going to help him.
I made my way up to his big, dark wooden door and stood outside there for a while.
I let in a deep breath, and exhaled after. Why was I nervous? I didn't know. I guess I was just scared. Not of Kyle, but what Kyle thought of me.
I was wrong yesterday, I was wrong to finish him. I knew that now, and I wanted him back, badly.
But why would he want to take me back? I was being dramatic and irrational just because I was angry and upset. I took it all out on Kyle when I shouldn't have.
He was always there for me and I threw it back in his face and that must have hurt. I wanted to punch myself for being so inconsiderate.
I was a selfish person, thinking about me and not others. It must have been awful for him to keep this secret, something that he knew would crush me, and I wasn't considerate enough to him. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't want me back.
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I laid my shaking hand on the door handle and went to open it. The door didn't open, it just rattled when I pushed it. It must have been locked.
Shit, how was I going to get him to hear me? How was I going to get him to let me in?
The crashing became almost worse, and I could hear him almost growling in anger.
"Kyle!" I shouted. He didn't hear me. "Kyle open the door!" I began to bellow as loudly as I could.
Suddenly, the thumping stopped, and if I listened carefully, all I could hear was his panting breath.
"Let me in, Kyle," I demanded, a little more quieter. I didn't hear another sound. "Come on, baby, I'm sorry, Kyle," I tried to plead with him. I wanted to see him.
"What do you want?" I heard his croaked voice through the door. I sighed and laid my forhead against it.
"I want to see you,"
"But you left me," I heard his vulnerability seep through the cracks of the door.
"I didn't mean it, Kyle, I was upset, please, I love you," finally, the door had opened, and the sight made me gasp.
Kyle's hair was a complete mess. His eyes were red rimmed and they had the darkest bags underneath from lack of sleep. He had a bruised and cut knuckle, now he had two. His clothes were creased and dirty and they had holes in everywhere. He looked a mess, and my heart squeezed for him.
I walked to him and cuddled him in to my arms.
"Kyle, Jesus Christ," I whispered against his chest as my own chest tightened.
"You promised me over and over and over again that you wouldn't leave and when the going gets tough, you run, like you always have," he let out as he laid his hands in his hair in anger.
My heart sank when he didn't hug me back. He looked angry and fustrated and upset and it was awful to see.
"But do you know what, Cali?" He said as he pulled himself away from me. "All you think of is yourself, you know that? Do you even know how bad it was for me to hold such a secret like your dad having cancer? I didn't want to hold this, but I did it for him, I did it because he told me too to keep you safe and protected and happy. I went along with it for the sake of you and your father. I couldn't tell your fathers secret, not something this big!" His voice raised near to the end.
"Kyle-"
"No!" He shouted. "This isn't fair on me. This wasn't fair. You contradicted yourself, you went on about me trusting you, and how I should trust you, and I did, I bent my fucking back trying to make you happy, and when you tell me you'd never leave the first thing you do is leave, now that just ruined the trust I had to get for you to see you happy,"
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"I'm sorry, Kyle," tears started pouring down my cheeks. He turned away in anger.
"Your tears aren't going to work this time," there was a giant mess around him. All his room was trashed and a massive mess. Everything was broken or almost so. He must have lashed out fireclt against his room.
"I'm sorry! I'm really sorry! I was just upset and I wasn't thinking," I let out pleadingly as I moved forward.
"No, you weren't thinking, and you broke my heart and I can't go through this, I'm suffering, can't you see? Just because you were too selfish and self centred and everything was all about you," he turned back around to face me. His eyes were ablaze. "But what about me? You never thought about me, this is just bullshit, and I'm not having it,"
"But I love you, I promise you i'll change,"
"I don't want you to change, I fell inlove with you the way you are, I just want you to leave me alone," his eyes welled up and I realised my heart was even more further down my body.
"Don't do this, Kyle, please, I want to be with you again," I began to sob.
"I fucking love you, Cali, but you've just crossed the line, and you really fucking killed me,"
"Let me fix this, please let me fix this,"
"I don't want you to try and fix anything!" He shouted as he leaned against the wall and fell to the floor. He laid his head on top of his crossed over arms. His body began to shake. "I needed you, I needed you so fucking much, you were my stability and my life, you made me so happy and full of life, you were all I needed,"
"I still am," I whispered. "I still am!" I sniffled.
"You took my heart and then you stomped on it when you said we were over, and you broke me, and I'm broken, and I want you so much," he sniffled too. He wiped his eyes and his nose angrily.
"Why don't you have me then?" I breathed.
"I don't know," he breathed. "Fuck, why am I crying?" I went over to him and I sat down next to him. His body flinched and I could feel his body almost moving away, and that hurt, but I left it anyway and didn't comment on it.
"Kyle, listen to me, I love you, I need you and I want you. I didn't mean to do what I did, you've got to believe me, I heard news I never wanted to hear, I didn't think I could do it, I'm an awful girlfriend and I don't even know why or how you could love me, but you do, and I love you, and nobody in this world can love you like I do, so don't waste this,"
"But you nearly wasted it yesterday," he snapped. I sighed.
"And I now know I was wrong, it was in the heat of the moment, I didn't mean it, I don't want us to be over," I looked down to the floor as my tears kept falling. "I want to make it right, I need you, please,"
"What am I doing?" He asked himself.
"You're trying to hurt me like I hurt you-"
"I'd never hurt you,"
"Not physically, but you're trying to hurt me with your words like I hurt you with mine," I cut him off.
"It was just like we held this tight rope, and we were pulling and pulling and pulling and we loved eachother to make it, but your words cut that rope and we both fell, now we're both hurt and broken, and I want you to fix that rope, but we can do it together, because whatever I do or say, I know that I'll never find someone like you, I'll never love someone like you who loves me back just as much, and I don't care what happened, I don't now, I just don't want to waste this love, I want to make the most of it and see where it leads," he replied quietly as he turns to look at me. He cups my face with his hands and I such against his skin.
"It'll lead to good places, I swear," he nodded his head. His eyes showed so much love and passion I couldn't resist him. I laid my two hands on his biceps and McCord my body closer to his.
"Forget what I said, forget everything, you'll need me, and I'm always here, I love you too much to keep us apart any longer," he said. His face moved closer. "We won't be apart any longer," he breathed against my lips as he smashed them against mine. He entwined his hands into my new short hair. "And you look fucking beautiful with that hair cut, baby, too fucking beautiful," he whispered before putting his lips to mine again.
He tugged hard in my hair and I moaned against his mouth.
"I'm sorry," I whispered again.
"Stop," he demanded. "Stop, don't say it, just say you love me,"
"I love you,"
"I know," he smiled. "And I love love love you,"
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Here you go guys.
Hope you enjoyed! And here's a second update for being so late:((x
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