seven:

"i think god might hate me, someone might as well end my suffering."

in a circle with three other girls. alisha to her left, then a tall blonde named dottie, and lastly a ginger with more rolls than others, but nonetheless beautiful named maggie. they were playing a game called "confession." essentially, baby was confessing to what happened the past week and the girls were hyping her up and destroying wednesdays name.

"and when he kissed me, it felt like.." baby began but then raised her hand to tap her chin as she thought, "well it felt like magic. really, it did!" when she first told the girls about wednesday, they were shocked to say the least. who wouldn't be? but they were supportive and quickly helped her feel better, as all good friends should do.

"no way! he could not have been that good at tongue!" dottie exclaimed as she gripped the large pillow in her hands. dottie had a bit of experience when it came to boys' moves this summer, especially with the whole rich boy group, but that was for another confession.

"well, i wouldn't really know. he's the only boy i've kissed."

"you're lying!" maggie exclaimed and threw her pillow at baby playfully. baby giggled out loud and threw the pillow back to her.

"i'm serious! it felt right when we kissed. his lips were kind of cold though.." baby muttered as her eyebrows furrowed. alisha smirked.

"ah, a kinky one he must be." alisha exclaimed. baby gasped out loud and threw her pillow at alisha and the girls all laughed.

"ugh! boys are just insufferable! i think god might hate me, someone might as well end my suffering." baby yelled put dramatically and lifted her hand to her forehead to emphasize her dramatics. alisha rolled her eyes at the girl.

"you are extra baby. a crazy, beautiful mess in one petite body." maggie said. baby smiled and reached over to hug maggie.

"i will take that as a compliment." baby said then stood and lifted her pillow suggestively. "pillow fight?"

the world might be a disgusting, backturning place, and boys might stink. but in cabin four, there was an unexplainable bond between four very different yet strong young women. it was a forever kinda thing.

____

baby did it. she gathered up all her courage and cried so much that it was flushed away, then she did it.

her chuck taylors were dirty due to the immense use of them. it didn't matter though as she took them off, and took her socks off, and khaki shorts. she was only in her green camp shirt, but it was long enough to cover her. but it didnt matter, she was alone.

the view toward the water was probably only a fifteen feet drop at most. she never looked at the water when she was with wednesday. he protected her from their cliff. but baby

didnt need protecting anymore. she was going to change, and this was the first idea on her list: get over your fears.

so as she looked down at the water that dropped into a beautiful blue spring, she jumped. she didnt even scream as she was submerged in the water. the water was warm, and baby laughed loudly when she reached the surface. to anyone watching in, she might've looked like a madman. but to her, it was self-discovery.

small fish swam around her, and even a small frog made it's way to her as it jumped on a lily pad. she smiled at it, and she knew it wouldn't smile back. but that didn't matter. what mattered was she enjoyed it, and the water was refreshing.

it was upsetting when the sun went down, but she promised to the water that she would be back. it was a stupid thing, but she felt the need to respect all living things. and nature was part of that.

carelessly, she slipped on her shorts and tucked the dirty socks into her back pocket. she didn't even put her feet all the way in her chuck taylor's before she went forward to her cabin. it was weird, that within the one day, a girl could change so much.

one thing was for sure: wednesday was going to wish he hadn't left her.

____

to y'all this chapter might be kinda crappy, but to me it was the most euphoric chapters i have ever written.

during this break, i have been trying to find myself fully, like baby. and it's such a beautiful thing that someone could relate to her so much as i do. and i hope you guys do xx.

i really love baby, she started off as mildly annoying and honestly a baby. mind the pun. but she is discovering herself and i find that so beautiful that she can do that w/o a man and know her worth. she has a long way to go, for sure but i'm really happy with who she's becoming.

also, has anyone else been mildly out of shape bc of this break? because i def. am :( if you are, don't worry! you're still a bad b and ily anyways.

xoxo till tomorrow haha -dee

p.s. am i on a roll with updating or what?