As we left the restaurant, Josh slid his hand into mine, intertwining our fingers, gently swinging our arms. The walk back was pretty quiet for the most part, thankfully we were parked just down the sidewalk.

Before going back inside, Josh stopped, turning around to face me.

"You know, it kinda feels like the first night we went out." He giggled to himself. I felt my cheeks burn. "I always hoped I'd get a second chance at that. I kinda feel like.. I choked." He said, scrunching up his face.

"Yeah, you kinda did.." I said softly, smirking back at him. He smile grew as he pulled me in closer. I felt my heart start to beat faster as he stared back at me with dazed eyes.

"Could I.. get a do over?" He asked, flashing me a wide grin. I couldn't help but smile, nodding back at him.

"Yeah.." I said softly, my smile growing. He then reached over, holding my face in his hands, pulling me into a gentle kiss.

When he backed away, he held his stare on me, giving me subtle smile. I sighed, staring back, but I just couldn't help but feel like.. something was missing. I guess couldn't expect to feel that instant spark with everyone. Maybe we just needed more time, because on paper.. Josh was perfect. He was sweet and sensitive and thoughtful, but despite all of that.. he just wasn't-

"You ready to head back in?" He asked, smirking back at me. "I'm sure they're all waiting up." I quickly snapped out of it. He laughed, rolling his eyes. My stomach dropped. The idea of Jake sitting there as I walked in from my date with Josh.. getting back on that bus was the last thing I wanted to do.

"Y-you go ahead, I'm.. I'm gonna call my Dad quick to let him know about my.. change in plans." I said, forcing a smile. He nodded.

"Okay, great." He said, leaning in, quickly kissing me on the cheek. "But don't take too long, it's freezing out here." He laughed, making his way inside. I waited until I heard him walk back up into the main area of the bus before dialing.

"Hey Sweetheart, nice to hear from you." He said cheerfully.

"Hey Dad.." I sighed.

"Oh no, what's wrong?" He asked. I couldn't help but smile. He could always tell.

"What do you mean?"

"You think I don't know you by now?" He laughed. "Now.. tell me what's going on."

I wasn't really sure what was going on. An hour ago, everything felt right. Everything felt.. perfect. But then something in me just.. flipped.

"Can I.. ask you something?" I finally said. He was quiet for a moment.

"Of course, Sweetheart."

"H-how did you know.. with Mom.." I heard him laugh.

"I don't think your mother is the best example but.. I think I know where you're going with this." He giggled to himself. "Are you having boy problems?" I felt my cheeks burn. The last thing I wanted to do was talk to my dad about boys but..

"You can say that." I said softly. "Josh took me out tonight."

"And.. which one is Josh?" He asked. I smiled, shaking my head.

"He's the one that babysat Mom that night." I laughed.

"Ah, that one. Well, he seemed like a nice guy. What's the problem?"

"T-that's the thing, I.. I don't know. He.. he's perfect but-"

"But he's not the one."

My heart sunk. He wasn't the one.

"But.. what if he could be and I'm just.. doing what I always do." I sighed, now starting to pace around the parking lot.

"Well, you just have to ask yourself.. if you could have anyone in the world.. would it be him?"

"I.. I don't know. Maybe it's.. too soon?"

"And that could be. But also, sometimes people are just.. wrong for us, no matter how great they are. But only you can decide which one it is." I nodded.

"But.. he also asked me to spend Christmas with him and his family." I said softly. He was quiet for a moment.

"And is that something you want to do?" He asked plainly. I could tell he was a little disappointed, but he would never say so.

"Y-yeah, I.. I think it is." I sighed.

"Well, then okay, Sweetheart. Just as long as you're going for the.. right reasons." I bit down on my lip, nodding again.

"Yeah.." I said quietly. "Thanks, Dad."

"Okay, Sweetheart. I am going to miss you though." He said quietly.

"I'm gonna miss you too, but.. I think it's something that.. I need to do. I'll be sure to call."

"Alright, I love you, Sweetheart."

"I love you, Dad. Goodnight."

"Will you sit down? You're making us all anxious." Sam said, rolling his eyes, taking another sip of his beer. I sighed, glaring over at him. I hadn't been able to sit down since I saw Jess and Josh together outside of the venue. I couldn't believe they were going out and I just had to sit here and act like nothing was happening.

"You're the one who told her to go out with him." Sam snapped. "Now you're shocked that she actually is?" I sighed, finally sitting down on the couch, running my hands through my hair.

"I'm so stupid." I mumbled, staring up at the ceiling.

"Yeah." He laughed. "You are."

"Ugh.. how long are they gonna be?" I groaned.

"Well, it's a date." Danny chimed in. "They're gonna be out for a while."

"Not helping, Danny." I snapped. He smiled, rolling his eyes, shooting Sam a look.

And then I heard talking outside.

I quickly jumped up, peeking out the window to see Jess and Josh walking towards the bus, hand in hand. I felt like I was gonna be sick. I hated seeing them together, but I just couldn't bring myself to look away.

"Why are you torturing yourself?" Sam sighed. "You know you're not gonna like what you're gonna see."

"What do you mean?" I asked, keeping my eyes glued out the window.

"You really wanna watch them make out?"

"W-what makes you think they're gonna make out?" I asked, feeling my stomach drop.

"Cause.. they're coming back from their date." Danny laughed.

That didn't mean anything. What if the date didn't go well? Maybe I was worrying for nothing.

"You know, it kinda feels like the first night we went out." Josh said, laughing to himself. "I always hoped I'd get a second chance at that. I kinda feel like.. I choked." I felt my face get hot, my fists clenching. That first night when Jess assured me that "nothing had happened" between them, was it because she didn't want anything to happen, or was it just because Josh had choked?

"Yeah, you kinda did.." Jess said, smirking at him. Josh smiled back at her, pulling her in closer.

"Could I.. get a do over?" He asked. She smiled, nodding back at him.

"Yeah.." She said. Josh then reached over, holding her face in her hands, pulling her in.

I quickly looked away before I saw anything. I felt like I was gonna be sick. I couldn't believe this was happening, and it was all my fault. Why was I so stupid? Everything could've been perfect between us but.. no. Now she was out with him.

"Are they making out?" Sam asked, keeping his eyes down as he began peeling the label off of his beer. I felt my cheeks burn.

"Shut up." I snapped.

And then the door opened.

I quickly got up from the couch, going over and sitting down next to Sam. He shot me a look, and then brought his attention back to his bottle.

"How was your date?" Danny asked. I peeked up at him, glaring, but he kept his eyes locked on Josh.

"It was good." He said, his cheeks burning, doing his best to hold in his smile.

"Ended kinda early, don't you think?" I said, looking over at him. He turned to face me, now leaning up against his bunk.

"Did it? I don't know.. we kinda just lost track of time." He shrugged. I felt my cheeks burn.

"Is she staying in your bunk tonight?" Sam asked. I looked over at him, wide-eyed, feeling my heart race. What has gotten into him lately? I could tell he was already drunk. Sam was always a partier but things felt.. different lately.

"No." Josh said quietly, now picking at his nails. "We're taking things slow." Sam giggled to himself.

"Seems like you're the only one she's taking things slow with." He said, rolling his eyes. He got up, going over to the fridge for another beer.

"W-what do you mean?" Josh asked, his cheeks getting redder.

"I mean.. she's already spent the night with Jake, and with me. Sorry, Danny." He laughed. My stomach dropped. What was he doing?

"Hey, you can leave me out of this." Danny laughed, rolling his eyes.

"W-with you? Why.. was she with you?" Josh said, his voice dropping. Sam shrugged, opening his bottle and tossing the cap onto the floor.

"Your guess is as good as mine, at this point." He said plainly, taking a big sip.

"Well.. maybe she wants to take things more seriously with us." Josh said, doing his best not to sound concerned, but I could tell his mind was now running a mile a minute.

"Yeah, I doubt it." Sam giggled to himself. Josh glared over at him, but eventually turned away.

"Whatever.." He sighed, hopping up onto his bunk. "Her and I had a great night. So I really don't care what you guys have to say."

I looked back over at Sam who was now staring out the window with sad bloodshot eyes, his face looking like it was seconds away from crying. As much as I wanted to know what was going on with him, I had other things to worry about.

"And just so you guys know.." Josh snapped, peeking back out from his bunk. "I invited her to come back with us for Christmas, and she said she'd love to.. with me. And last I checked, she didn't want to go for either of you. So I guess we'll see who she's more serious about."

My heart dropped.