This person feels that loving someone is about giving the same amount of love back.

Hello,

All relationships can be emotionally draining at times. The trick is figuring out where your boundaries are within that relationship and expressing those boundaries so both of you know what the other is comfortable and uncomfortable with. It sounds like part of your problem is that you haven't communicated the problem itself. So he is expressing his feelings in a certain way that doesn't communicate well for you. That's okay. People have different love languages, and especially when we are not accustomed to or familiar with receiving a certain type of love language, it can feel weird and sometimes even uncomfortable because we're not used to it. It can feel like a lot. That's okay. That's normal. You need to be able to communicate to him how best to love you, and you can ask the same of him. Ask him how you can best express your feelings for him.

Communication is so important in any kind of relationship, so for you to healthily continue, it is extremely important for you to communicate with each other.

Now, if you don't feel happy in this relationship, you always have the option to end the relationship and work on your quote: "learn to love yourself" before you enter into another romantic relationship. Either way, my advice is the same. Figure out your boundaries, your love languages, and your needs in a relationship. Then communicate them, whether that means working on your current relationship or leaving it. I hope this helps, love.

Good luck, and message us again anytime!

Stay strong,

The Advice Column Team