This person is bisexual and is having trouble with their family and friends regarding how they keep supporting the lgbtq+ community.

Hello,

This is a hard question. Coming out is a big thing, and considering what you're family believes, I can't imagine telling them right now would not go over well for anyone.

Here's the thing. They're going to find out eventually. Chances are, it's not a secret you can hide from them for the rest of your life or theirs. One day, they're going to find out, any you'll have to find a way to handle it. The question is, when do you tell them? Can you handle their reactions, and their subsequent change in attitude towards you until you're in a place where you can move out on your own, go to college, etc.? I can tell you right now, if you're family is primarily homophobic, coming out as bisexual will not go over well with them, and thus it won't go over well for you either.

If they keep questioning you, you can absolutely say that you're an ally, and leave it at that. You don't have to go into detail, and you don't have to give a lengthy justification for your beliefs. In this case, the less information you give the better. You're an ally. Why? Because you believe people should be free to be themselves, or to love each other. That's it.

And when you feel it's time to tell your family, make sure you're in a position of not only financial, but emotional stability. If you're in a bad place mentally or emotionally and you take on the added stress of family members not supporting you, it will only serve to negatively affect that already downtrodden state. And who knows? Maybe they will support you. Maybe they will, but it's best not to rely on maybe's and hopefully. Don't give up hope, love, but don't close your eyes to the other possibilities either. I hope this helps, darling!

Stay strong,

The Advice Column Team