This person is struggling with their body image.

I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way about yourself, but I want you to know that tons of people struggle with their body image. Much of what we encounter in society--the internet, celebrities, friends--can give us a harmful perception of our own bodies. You are certainly not the only one who feels this way.

Upon reading your request, it seems that your friend’s snide comments are doing more bad than good. I don’t know if that is her intent, but you should tell her that her words are having a negative impact on you, regardless of what she is trying to accomplish. If you ignore her, she might just continue with it, and you don’t deserve to sit through that.

If you ask me, I would say that all body types are beautiful. It doesn’t matter what size, shape, or height they are; everyone has beauty in them. Everyone has the right to express themselves in any way they want, whether that is to dress ‘like a boy’ or ‘like a girl’ or any other variant. She should accept the style you have chosen, not diss it. How would she feel if it was the other way around? Plus band T-shirts rock! Being your friend, she really should be less critical of your body and how you choose to dress.

You’re not going to love your body straight away. Many people struggle for a long time with their body image, but abstaining from food isn’t going to help. Not eating enough can cause havoc for your hormones, slow down your metabolism, lead to heavy anxiety, and is considered a stress on the body, which can actually lead to the body holding onto weight for longer rather than losing it.

If you are determined to lose weight, there are healthier options than starving yourself. There are apps, YouTube videos, and online courses that you can take. A lot of them you can find for free, which will help you with a diet and exercises for what you need.

Please remember you’re beautiful in your own way :)

With Love,

The Advice Column Team.