.

"Five minutes, Zo!"

Little feet run around the apartment. I'm not sure what on earth a six year old could possibly need to pack last minute, but my girl is on a mission. I watch from the front door with the knob in my clutch as she runs from room to room with a bag, slowing down a little every time she reemerges.

"Four..."

"One more!" She says excitedly. Her blonde ponytail bounces as she quickly grabs her last item and scurries to me panting for air.

"Watcha got there?" She opens her little Shopkins backpack and displays a bag stuffed with books. I can't help but to smile.

"Zo, I assure you that grandma and grandpa have books at their house."

"You don't know! Do they have Goosebumps? Boxcar Children? Romona? I need all the feels!" Definitely my child.

"Yes. I know they do, because they are in my bedroom. So let's leave that bag here. We have plenty to lug to Iowa already."

Her bright green eyes look up to me and a pout troubles her little face. "But mommy..."

I sigh, knowing I'm going to give in. I can't resist the pout. "Only you could make me feel bad for not allowing you to bring your chapter books. How about you bring one from each series and any book that is on my book shelf at grandma and grandpa's house that you want, you can bring home?"

"Deal!" She yells as she starts tossing books out of her bag.

Deal. Great. Whatever gets us on the road with less to carry, I'm good with it. She puts her backpack on over her shoulders and finally we are ready. Only two hours behind schedule, I'm calling it a victory.

"How long of a drive is it?" She takes my hand as I lock up our small apartment. There's not much to steal in there really. Everything is pretty much boxed and waiting for the movers to drive it four blocks over to our house.

"Eight hours, did you go potty?"

"Yes, I did. Did you?" She returns my question.

"Sure did."

"Did you bring a good book?"

I give her a big smile knowing a I have a copy of Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy shoved in one of my many bags in the car. "Of course."

It only takes twenty minutes before Zo is asleep in the car. I knew it wouldn't take long if I withheld her nap. That combined with the excitement of a road trip and wedding festivities? She should be out for a few hours at least. Which I need that time for me, because I know I'm not ready to return to Luxberg.

Seven years. I left Luxberg seven years ago next week and I never looked back, not once. I'm not the same girl who left. Is that me saying I'm some badass mom who left every trouble behind? Absolutely not. I'm not about to play off that I'm okay now, because I'm not. I'm just different. My life is different.

I'm Gabby Brooks, the mom of a beautiful green-eyed blonde. I love reading and late night chats on the phone with my best friend as we drink wine and discuss our college days. I work hard as a librarian for our local university. I have an irrational fear of wooded areas and large bodies of water, so naturally I moved to the land of ten-thousand lakes after my college graduation. It's been three years since I've needed medication to help me sleep. And I am in love.

My phone begins to ring out from the seat beside me and I begin to palm the seat in an attempt to find it without my eyes leaving the long stretch of highway in front of me. "Pocketful of Sunshine" by Natasha Bedingfield threatens to wake my sleeping daughter and minor curse words fall from my lips. Finally I clutch it and swipe quickly without even looking who's calling.

"Hello?"

"You remembered to bring the table cloths right? Michael's didn't have enough of the ivory!"

"Oh my gosh mom, yes! For the millionth time, I have them! I have everything!"

"Gabs don't get upset with me. I'm panicking! How far are you?" She isn't going to like my answer. She wanted me there yesterday.

"We left like an hour ago... Zo was having a book crisis."

"Right. And her mom wasn't at all dragging her feet to come home."

My eyes roll. "I am home."

"Gabby..."

"Lots if traffic mom, gotta go! See you soon! Love you!" I end the call and toss the phone back down.

She's stressing me out. Going to Luxberg is stressing me out. Basically everything is stressing me out. The phone rings out again and I grab and swipe angrily.

"For fucks sake I have everything! The linens! The twinkle lights! Zo's dress! EVERYTHING BUT MY DAMN SANITY!" I dart my eyes quickly to my rear view mirror and see my daughter is still sound asleep.

"Whoa, girlfriend. Who pissed in your Cheerios this morning?" Morgan's voice giggles through the phone.

"Fuck. I'm sorry, Morgs. My mom is driving me crazy. If she phones me one more time today I'm going to lose it."

"Uh huh, is that the real reason you're stressing? Or is it because we will be back in Luxberg tonight?"

I sigh into the phone and pull off the road. "I'm freaking out, Morgan. I don't want to go back."

"You agreed to this Gabby. No turning back now. Think happy thoughts..."

"About Luxberg?"

Fuck that. The only happy thoughts I have of Luxberg are with Jax. Thinking of Jax makes me depressed. So I just don't think about either one.

"No, not of that shit town. Think of..." she gives me a long dramatic pause. "Your birthday."

A smile creeps across my face and I pull back onto the road. "You're the best, you know that right?"

"Right?! God, I'm fucking amazing..."

"So amazing that you and Cole are gonna talk shit out tonight when we hang out?"

"Fuck no. I'm not desperate. Stop thinking about that loser, I'm not. Happy thoughts chica! Happy birthday thoughts!"

"You're such an idiot. I love you. See you tonight."

"Peace out, girl scout." My call ends and I toss the phone again chucking. She really is good and getting my mind off the shit in my life. My last few birthdays have been nothing short of amazing, but my last birthday, I know that's the one she's referring to. That's the one that can make me laugh and cry at the same time. It was the best.