.

Before I even take out my phone, I mentally tell myself I'm not going to cry. I've cried for a few days straight, and I want to get through one call without tears.

I sit in my bed against the wall, pulling my phone out of my back pocket. My parents haven't left us alone for two days. I haven't been able to talk to Jax or Courtney. I have an hour before they get home, I'm just hoping Jax isn't working.

I select Alfie Tats from my contacts and wait.

"You've been ignoring my messages Books..." he answers.

"House arrest. All summer."

There is now complete silence on on the other end of the phone. I wait for Jax to break it.

"Gabby does he know about us?"

"No, I don't think so. He said that all three of his children are disappointments and you were the only one he could trust. He liked that you yelled at us for going to the party and calling him."

"I swear I didn't tell him, he didn't answer..."

"Mickey told him. He was worried about Lily, I get it."

"Shit. So what did Sydney do to piss them off?"

I feel my lips turn to a frown. "She was at the party. Dad found her and her friends with Tyler."

"Did he touch her?" He asks angrily.

"No. But that's the second time he's been found around her. The first time I found them together at he mall, his hand was on her back. I could have killed him."

Jax sighs and I know he's trying to control his temper. I begin waiting for his Tyler-rant, he loves bitching about the Porter brothers.

"Gabby I miss you."

Not the Tyler-rant I was expecting.

A smile appears on my face and I lie back on my pillow. My stomach feels like it's floating and filled with butterflies hearing him say things like this. "I miss you too Jax."

"What exactly does this house arrest entail?"

"I can't leave the house unless I am with my parents or an academic activity. Which, the only one left is graduation."

I feel myself on the verge of tears with a knot forming in my throat. I'm not going to get to see him until the end of summer.

"We will figure something out."

"He's pissed Jax" the tears begin running down my face. "I can't see you or Courtney."

"Books don't cry..."

I can't help it. The tears flow out of me like rain. I end the call, hanging up on Jax. Sobs escape me. Not just because I can't see him, but because I know I messed up. I put myself in danger, and I put my little sister in danger too. I would never forgive myself if something happened to her.

"Who were you talking to?" I look up to Felix in my doorway. He looks angry with me. I'm not supposed to be on the phone, it's for emergencies only at the moment and he knows he's in charge right now since mom and dad aren't home.

"No one" I wipe my tears.

"Was that Jackson Parker?"

The anger in his voice grows. I stare at him and don't answer.

"You lied to me Gabby! Are you seeing him? Be honest with me!"

"No. I'm not seeing him." I lie to him. He can't know. He's pissed at him anyways because I told him I had sex with him and then he dumped me. I honestly believe he would tell my dad he's so mad right now about Jax telling Mickey about the party. Felix is never in trouble and now he is grounded all summer. I've never lied to my brother before.

"Was that him on the phone? He's dangerous Gabby! Dad doesn't want you near him. He doesn't even want me by Courtney because of him. You don't know anything about him!"

The heat in my face rises. He's never home. How the hell would he know that I don't know him? I know more about Jackson than I do Courtney.

"No Felix... you don't know him! He's not dangerous! He gets a real bad rep for something he doesn't regret, and I wouldn't either if I were him."

His face turns to stone. "You know what he did?"

"Yes, he told me."

I stand from the bed and plug my phone into its charger, attempting to ignore Felix's pissy attitude.

"What did he do? Court won't tell me..."

My eyes meet his. This is not for me to tell. It would jeopardize my friendship with Courtney. She is the only friend I have right now besides Jax. If she hasn't told Felix yet then that is not something she wants a current boyfriend to know.

"I can't tell you Felix."

"Why? Gabby I've taken a lot of shit for you since I got home. I'm in college and I'm grounded because that asshole couldn't keep his mouth shut about the party. You're defending him even though he screwed and dumped you? Stop sticking up for him. What did he do?"

My tears come down my face again as he glares at me. Even he looks disappointed in me. First I lie and now I won't tell him what he wants to hear.

"I can't tell you because it involves Courtney. If she doesn't want you to know, then I'm sorry..." I shrug.

"Whatever Gabby." He shakes his head in disproval. "Dad was never this bad until you started fucking up. I don't know what happened to you after I left for college, we were close. Now it seems like every time I come home I'm bombarded with your drama. Stay away from me this summer. Maybe I can enjoy part of it."

I cringe at his words. "Felix..."

He stands there for a minute, unable to make eye contact with me, then walks away. I hear his door slam letting me know this conversation is over.

My phone lights up on my desk and I know is Jax calling me back. I look down the hall at Felix's closed door and feel sick. Not one, we have never had one fight. I return to my room and grab my phone, swiping to answer it.

"Everyone hates me Alfie." I begin bawling.

The only two people I have left are Courtney and Jax. The only two people who believe me are Courtney and Jax... the two people that didn't grow up here with me. The people who have known me my entire life don't believe me. The ones who should know me better than anyone. They should know I wouldn't lie. Morgan, Cole, Kane, Mom, Dad, Sydney, now Felix...

I hear him fill his chest with a deep breath and release a heavy sigh. "I love you Gabby Brooks. You stay on this phone with me and cry as long as you want."

And so I do.