For a second, I feel my heart stop beating as his words register in my head, the solemn look on his face only deepening when he finally tears his eyes away from the view and turns to look at my face.

How am I supposed to react?

What am I supposed to say?

I feel my heart starting to break as his words start sinking in, the pressure on my chest rising as I look at him without blinking. A part of me wants to believe that maybe I didn't hear him right, but I know that I did. God!

When he notices that I am not going to speak, he runs a hand through his hair. I want to speak, I really do, but I don't want to say anything wrong if I cannot say anything right, so I'd rather not say anything at all.

"It started when I was around seven, I think.." He begins and I know the reason he didn't want me to turn around was because he doesn't want me to look at him while he talks, so taking a huge gulp which does nothing to ease the knot in my throat, I turn to look in front of me. The fairylights almost go unnoticed by me as I realise the darkness of the night looming over, suddenly noticing the change in mood.

I tighten my hold on his hand, conveying in some way that I was listening to him. "At first, it was a random slap because I broke a glass in the kitchen by mistake. Then, it shortened down to every week where she used to smack me around. She always had wine at dinner but that switched to bourbon soon, and Dad noticed but he had never restricted her, so he didn't tell her anything especially because she was recently fired from her job for stealing a huge amount.

"I was a kid, I didn't understand shit that was happening in the house but I thought every child was beaten up because the parents felt like they had to have some control on their kid. Dad was handling his business, it was a new budding company so he wasn't at home much. The slaps soon turned to much worse, she used her fist, and kicks as if I was the reason that everything was wrong in her life." He pinches the bridge of his nose.

I am so glad that I am not facing him right now due to the tears that are stinging my eyes. I bring our joined hands upto my mouth and press a kiss on his hand. When he said that he would rather have my situation where I didn't have a mom than his own, I didn't understand it then, but now, I do. It's fucked up in so many ways and I just want to hold him so tightly, but I know he isn't done talking.

"Every time she'll beat me up, she would immediately snap out of it and tend to my bruises like she was a caring mother, and I wanted affection, I was a kid.. so each time she said, 'I'm sorry Topher, it wouldn't happen again.' I actually bought that bullshit, and that god awful name!" He tugs at the root of his hair.

He shifts my body a little so that my weight is now leaning on his left side while his right hand wonders into his pocket. He pulls out a cigarette pack and a lighter, and I want to object but I don't. I know it helps with stress, and even though it's toxic, that's the conversation for another time.

"Do you mind?" He asks, motioning to the cigarette that he has already lit up and I shake my head, not trusting my voice to speak.

"Anyway, one day she came home shit faced, and I knew she was out of it so I actually stayed in my room. I was already ten, by the time? I don't remember the age really, and I'd rather not actually. So, she came to my room and she was so out of it she could barely walk. I was half awake, and she started beating me up and then.." he trails off, closing his eyes as he takes a really deep drag and lets out the smoke in the air through his parted lips.

With each detail he reveals, the more I feel my heart breaking. No child deserves what he got, and the worst part was that he got it from someone who's supposed to look after you, someone who's supposed to be your care-giver.

I finally muster up the strength to speak up, "Chris, you don't have to tell me everything." I tell him honestly because he looks so much in pain.

He doesn't look at me but nods, continuing, "She just did things that a no child should be done to, Claire. It was so fucking awful especially because I was sobbing the fuck out. Dad wasn't home!"

I can't even imagine that so much was happening in that house across the street with mine while I had a perfect childhood with a loving father and a best friend. Somehow, it makes me feel guilty, because I should have been there. We were just across the street, if we had been friends, he would have said something, had someone to talk to and..

"Don't, don't think what I think you are thinking. That isn't fair to you." His voice snaps me out and when I look at him, he's staring at me with darkness swallowing his gray orbs so I just nod, because this isn't about me. This isn't about me at all, and I cannot be selfish enough to make this about me.

Much to my surprise, he continues, "I thought it was a one time thing, that what happened when she was so drunk wouldn't happen again, but I was in deep denial of what was happening. I actually started covering my bruises from everyone's eyes, and that was the most fucked up thing I could do. It happened for two years, and I kept my mouth shut because she started threatening me. She said that if I told my father, he would blame me, kick me out of the house because he was in love with her and that he would never cause her any harm.

"I was a really stupid kid who fell for that lie. There were times when she sobered up for months and things would go back to being fine, but she never got another job, and soon, she was a stayhome drunk. Dad was travelling back then, a lot, so he was barely home and I barely got out of home. But then Jordan and I became friends.. and he saw the bruises on my back. He confronted me, and I just told him to leave it alone, that it was nothing.

"He told me to stop defending whoever the hell was doing that to me, and that I needed to tell someone. He didn't even think it could be my mother because he actually suggested that I should talk to her about it, and I think that's when he figured it was her. Jordan talked to his Mom, and we weren't friends for long but I actually looked up to his family in so many ways, because they had such a normalcy in their life, Claire. But, it pissed me off incredibly that he told his mother who, obviously contacted my father somehow.

"Dad flew in just the next day and asked me if I wanted to tell him anything, and I denied. Straight out. God, I remember the look of hurt on his face when he lifted my shirt and saw the marks." He closes his eyes and put down the cigarette, tossing it to the ground and then turned to me completely, finally making eye contact as he spoke, "He supported me, made me realise that I could go to him anytime I had any problems and he actually made me realise that the threats she was feeding me were all bullshits."

He pauses and then continues, "So every time I feel a strange skin contact, it brings back the flashbacks and when I am angry, and feel any kind of touch, I just lash out. Badly." He finishes, and I stare at him for the longest of time.

That has to be the most fucked up thing I have ever heard in my life, making me realise about the actual hardships. He went through so much shit as a child, in fact the word shit doesn't even muster up half of what he suffered from. I can't ever forget the look on his face as he repeated things one after another.

If I knew it was this, I would have never asked him in the first place because I cannot even begin to imagine how fucked up it must be inside of his head right now.

"Can I ask you something?" I say and he looks at me.

"Jail. She's in jail, Claire. Dad reported her, got the best lawyer who made the strongest case. She isn't getting out for another few years and her parental rights have been terminated, and I also have a restraining order against her." He explains and I nod, not even wondering how he knew that I was going to ask about her.

I have never met the woman, but if I ever did, god, I would have punched her in the face with no remorse whatsoever!

"How much time did you take to forgive Jordan?" I ask, picking on the cloth of my jeans.

"One day. I couldn't be mad at him, if anything, he did me a favour." He shrugs and I nod.

"Is that why you let him kiss you? Returning a favour?" I give out a small smile, trying to lighten the mood because I hate seeing him like this.

He laughs, the sound of his chuckle surprising me yet sounding so refreshing to my ears as I smile at him. He shakes his head, "I would have let him kiss me either way, Claire. He needed to figure things out, I was just helping fasten the process." He shrugs.

He nudges my side and I take that as a hint to turn around to face him, still sitting in between his legs with my legs folded underneath me, my support on my knees.

"Thank you." He says and I frown.

"What for?"

"For listening to that, and not showing me any pity. I would've lost any feelings I have for you if I had seen any trace of pity in your eyes." He says and I shake my head.

"I would have apologised, Jay but what happened, I cannot undo it. But I can be with you and listen you, whenever you need me, alright?" I say, my hand moving upto his cheek and I look into his eyes, "This is okay, right?"

He nods, "Yes, don't worry, I kinda like your touch." He smiles and I lean forward to place a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

"Thank you for trusting me with everything, though." I tell him and he nods.

He wraps his arms around me and I do the same, and we stay like for a while, just holding each other. I could feel his body relaxing with every sigh that escaped his lips but then he groaned and I parted, following his gaze that landed on the burgers.

"Am I the worst date ever or what? I didn't even let you eat anything because I was busy in my soppy story." He says, irritated and I smile a little.

"It's alright, we can have something to eat when we head back." I tell him.

He nods, "Do you wanna head home? We've been here for about two hours already and it's a pretty long drive back." He says.

I didn't realise that it had already been two hours, but still I shook my head, "Fifteen minutes more, alright? Then we can go back." I tell him, turning around again to see the view and he chuckles, pulling me closer to himself.

"You know why I brought you here?" He asks and I shake my head.

"No, you wouldn't even tell me where we were going. Also, how the hell did you even find this place?" I ask, curious.

The mood had shifted to a little lighter now, and I was glad to see a smile on his face. He doesn't do that often, so seeing that just makes every part in my body relax.

"Dad brought me here a week after she went to jail, he said he came here to think for creative business ideas." He laughs lightly, "I love the man, but he never thinks about anything besides business."

"You seem pretty proud of him though, I remember when Dad asked about your father, and you had this smile on your face." I recall, the memory playing in my head.

He turns to me, "What smile?" He asks.

"Like you are happy to have him in your life." I shrug.

"I am, even though he's not around much. He stayed for next four years, taking caring of me. But two years back I told him it was alright if he wanted to travel, because his business requires that and I understood. And he's home once in a while now." He explains and I nod.

Although I wonder if it gets lonely to stay alone. Because so many times Dad is out of town for cases with Paul, or without Paul. And unless Breanna or Evan come over, I get bored out of my mind. It must be the same for him.

He clears his throat, snapping me out of my daze, "I brought you here because I remember the smile on your face when we went to the creek. You look so fucking fascinated with that whole thing. Kind of made me want to do something similar." He says and I internally swoon at him.

"Yeah, I get impressed easily." I tease and he laughs, "Thanks Jay, all of this, it meant a lot. It was really the best date, even if you don't want to believe it." I tell him and he kisses my forehead, nodding.

We talked for another ten minutes about his upcoming game next weekend, and I listened to him. It reminded me of Evan but I didn't want to think about him right now, so I pushed his thoughts at the back of my mind.

After five minutes, he started putting things back in his backpack and gave me a hand which I gladly took as I stood up.

"What do you want to eat?" He asks when we have already been driving for about fifteen minutes.

"What are you offering?" I ask absentmindedly and he laughs.

"You make sexual innuendoes without even realising." He points out and that's when I realise, turning red.

"You have a dirty mind, that was a serious question. I am hungry." I pout and his hand comes to rest on my thigh, immediately making the tingles spread through my skin.

"I'll make you something to eat when we reach." He promises and I stare at him.

"I've never been to your house, you realise that?" I say out aloud and he thinks about it for a second.

"Yeah.. now that you say it like that. Don't worry, you'll see it in a while." He tells me.

The rest of the drive isn't as silent as it was on the way home, mostly because either I am singing a song or we are talking about his friendship with Jordan which makes me realise how serious their bond is. It's kind of adorable.

When we reach, he parks his car in the driveway and then slides out, coming to open my door and I snatch his backpack from the back seat.

"It's kind of heavy, did you collect pebbles from there?" I ask, pointing to the backpack and he shakes his head at me like I am a child. He does that a lot, in fact, but in a cute kind of way.

"Let's go inside." He motions towards the front door and I nod.

He pulls out a key from his pocket and unlocks the door. The darkness covers the whole house and he mutters something under his breath.

"Wait right here, I forgot to leave a few lights on when I left." He tells me and I nod as he shuts the door behind me.

I know he isn't by my side so two minutes later, lights switch on and I stare at the house, taking in the whole thing. Unlike my house, the stairs in this one for the floor above is directly by the entrance unlike by the living room side. I take a few steps inside and realise that on my left is the brightly lit kitchen with ravishing white marble and dark brown cabinets.

Besides it is the huge living room, a full rounded attached sofa covering the middle of it with two coffee tables in the front and a big LED in the front and I squint my eyes, yup, that's XBox. By the living room's side is a small hallway with two doors on each side, so I am assuming one is bathroom and one must be a bedroom. Not sure, though.

When I hear Chris's presence behind me, I turn around, "You're loaded." I point out the obvious, causing him to laugh out loudly.

"I thought that was the reason you agreed to go on a date with me?" He arches an eyebrow, causing a huge smile on my face, "And I am not loaded, Dad is. I have no idea why we have such a house when I live alone most of the time."

"How do you even maintain it? There isn't an inch of dirt anywhere around here."

"Uhh.. service comes every morning?" He says, embarrassingly rubbing the back of his neck and I laugh.

"Do you want to go to Vegas and get married?" I ask, wiggling my eyebrows, and he grins at me, going into the kitchen so I follow.

"On the first date? Let's wait till a third one at least." He jokes, and I roll my eyes.

He pulls out something from his fridge and I dramatically gasp, "When you said that you would make me something once we reached there, I didn't think you would go to such extents of microwaving frozen pizza for me."

A sheepish smile takes over his features as he looks at me, "I had to go to grocery shopping, which I totally forgot about, so.." he shrugs and I nod.

"Just heat the damn thing up. I am starving."

He does that, and then we settle in his living room. He switches on the television but I tell him to plug in the Xbox instead, causing him to give me a look.

"You play?" He asks and I smirk.

"I can beat your ass in it, I can bet."

"Ten dollars." He says and I nod.

"You're on."

We quickly finish our pizza first and then he starts Call of Duty. Ohh, the cliche! But, I love that game anyway, and I know all the fucking tricks that are to know about it.

Chris is cursing under his breath ten minutes later because I am beating his ass, and then he scoots closer to me almost unknowingly but I don't pay attention to him as I focus my eyes on the screen.

He keeps his arm on my thigh, still focusing on my game somehow and I know what he's trying to do, and while it takes everything in me to not pause and push him on the couch while I kiss him, I stay focused on the game.

"Woop woop, Jay. You lost." I grin by the end of it and he glares at me.

"I cannot believe that you actually beat me to it!" He runs a frustrated hand through his hair before pulling out ten dollars and passing it to me which I take with a victorious grin, "Where the hell did you learn that?" He asks.

"When you have a best friend who likes to earn money off of Xbox games through bets, you learn a trick or two." I shrug.

"Evan?" He asks and I nod.

He doesn't say anything, and I know he wants to but I don't want him to, honestly. We are having a good time and I don't want to ruin it. I scoot closer to him and make him face me.

I pull him down to myself, my hands going in his hair as I start to kiss him, trying to let go of any other thoughts that might be there. He kisses me back, his lips moving against mine as his fingers come to trace the bare skin on my stomach, causing huge amount of flutters in my stomach as the warmth from his skin spreads through mine.

He pulls me closer to himself as he deepens the kiss, our tongues swirling together as he moans my middle name, which is my new favourite sound.

But it is interrupted with someone clearing their throat behind us and the two of us immediately jump apart. I look behind the couch to see a very amused Jordan standing there, making me want to slap him for interrupting us.

"What the hell, man!" Chris says, looking at his best friend. "Where did you come from? It's almost midnight." He points to the clock on the wall.

"Yes, it is, but I forgot you had plans with her. I was calling you and you weren't picking up, so I came to check on you. By the way, in case you want to have sex, at least lock the front door." He tells the two of us.

My cheeks flame red and Chris just throws a murderous look to him, "Get out!" He tells him, "You came to check, I am dandy, now shoo." He motions for him to leave which only amuses Jordan further.