Requested by thank you sm!

"Bye baby! I'm gonna miss you!" Jack says as he lugs his two suitcases out of the door and that was it. We've tried making it work and Face Timing and texting every chance he gets but he's been really busy filming and he doesn't really have the time to do it. Not to mention he has a female role that he has to make a love connection with in the story. The days went by pretty fast when he was first gone but after living alone after the 5 month mark. I started really hating my body and felt like he was becoming out of love. Everyday as I looked at myself in the mirror i would always think, does he really still love me after all this? Does he really love all this fucking fat, marks, and blemishes? You know what, a diet might help, maybe a little working out might help too. I put on some running clothes which consisted of black leggings and an over sized black hoodie, hoping that wearing black I sweat more. After a while of running I feel so tired and out of shape. I decide to walk home and when I get into our house I feel like eating after I get out of the shower but I realize that I'm probably better off without eating today, I mean I could loose a couple of pounds, I am 136 after all. I throw myself on the couch and look through YouTube for some workout videos I could do in the backyard and when I find one I play it and head out into the backyard.

It's been 7 months since I've started working out and going on a diet. I'm right now 100 pounds. I feel really nauseous all the time and I feel like I'm about to pass out but it's been a real improvement from where I was. Today's the day that Jack comes home and even though it's been a big improvement I don't want Jack to notice so I wear another over sized hoodie and sweats. I'm watching TV until I hear the door unlock. "WELCOME HOME BABY!" I yell and jump up and hug him, really tight since it was the first time I've seen him in almost a year. "Hey," he slightly hugs me and removes me from him and goes upstairs to our room. I take this as a sign that he's just really tired and he just came home from a really long flight and just finished filming. After, a while I go back upstairs since it's late in the night and see that Jack is in deep sleep since what I was presuming was right, he was exhausted. After I take a shower I get into bed. I get under the sheets and Jack's arms come flying towards me which I then move away from. "What's wrong?" he asks and I shake my head. "Nothing's wrong. I'm just tired so I don't wanna cuddle," I try to make up an excuse. "Are you out of love with me?" I blurt out and he gives me a look like I have three eyes. "No, not at all! Why would you ever say that?!" he says and sits up out of bed. "It's that you weren't very excited when I came home, and you immediately went to bed," I say also getting up. "Baby have you not been eating," he says and I shake my head. "Of course I've been eating!" I say which a lie. He lifts up my sweater to reveal my ribs. "Baby, why are you doing this to yourself," he says and I pull my sweater back down and get out of bed. "Because I can tell your out of love! You make me feel like when you where away and we stopped contacting each other that you weren't into our relationship anymore so I thought that my body was the problem. So there, I'm skinny are you happy now!" I say and storm out of the bedroom. "Baby your body isn't the problem and will never be. I just thought you where bored of Face Timing and texting so I stopped. I never knew it would hurt you this much, so I'm sorry," he runs after me and gives me a hug. "Now can you please eat something in front of me so I know you've eaten," he says and I nod into his chest.

It's been another 7 months and I'm at a healthy weight at 125. Jack is still with me and we still love each other. And even though, I went through hell to get where I am today I can finally be proud of my body, along side Jack.

(Anyways, this is going to be some personal and deep shit so if you don't like that then skip this tiny part. I really am going through this right now. After March, I stopped eating full meals and didn't sleep, I survived on Monster's and chips and now I'm trying to get my eating right because we all know that my shit sleep schedule isn't going to get any better. If you're going through this please don't be afriad to DM me I will talk to you whenever you would like, and I won't say that stupid ass oH iT's GoNnA bE aLrIgHt because trust me, it don't help shit. But if you wanna vent to me and let it all out. I really will not judge or take any information out of the DM's and it will stay private. Have a great day/night and I love youuuuuu. Also please request if you would like)