Half an hour later, we were walking into a house overflowing with people, most we knew from school. The music was loud, and there were people mingling everywhere. It was nice to see everyone relaxing after a draining week. I could tell the increased stress was taking a toll on us all.

"Hey, Madison! Wanna come get a drink with us?" someone asked. I turned to see a group of girls on their way to the kitchen. I wasn't quite sure who they were, but I think the one that invited me was in my history class. Her name was Sasha or Sam or something. I looked at Jack, who gave me a 'go ahead' nod.

"Sure," I smiled, and followed them into the depths of the party.

I bumped into Jack again after about an hour.

"How's it going?" I asked him, yelling slightly over the music.

"Good! I'm glad we came," he responded.

"Me too. I actually got to know some of our classmates better. That girl Sadie with the red hair is really nice," I told him. Just then, I noticed Finn leaning against the wall near the kitchen holding a beer and looking a little lonely.

"Come on," I said, grabbing his hand and dragging him with me.

"Hi Finn," I greeted him cheerfully. He smiled at us approaching.

"Hey guys," he grinned.

"When did you get here?" Jack asked. Finn shrugged, taking a sip from his bottle.

"Like five minutes ago. What about you guys?"

"Uh, probably an hour ago," Jack said. We stood around and talked for a bit. I saw Ellie from across the room and waved, but she didn't respond. Neither boy knew what her problem was, so I shrugged it off.

"Alright guys, we're playing a game! If you wanna play, come into the living room," this girl, who I was pretty sure was the host, called out over the noise. The music had stopped momentarily, but resumed after the announcement had been made.

"Should we play?" I asked, and both boys agreed we should. We made our way to the living room, where people were beginning to sit in a circle. Jack and I sat next to each other, while Finn found an open spot on the other side of the room.

"We're playing... drumroll please," the host, who was obviously drunk, began, "spin the bottle! But wait! There's a twist! Whoever pulls away from the kiss first has to pay the other player $10. Everyone in?" she asked, and the group cheered. I looked at Jack worriedly.

"Do you still want to do this?" I questioned.

"I'm fine with it if you are. It's just a game, and making some money would be nice," he reassured me. "Plus, I love you. Kissing other people doesn't really matter, I know how much we like each other," he added.

"Alright. But we can stop each other if we get uncomfortable, ok?"

"Got it."

The game was pretty normal at first. It was fun to see how far people would go for ten dollars, but no one I really knew or cared about had been picked. That is, until the bottle came to a slow halt facing Jack. The person who had spun it was a girl from our gym class, who's name I couldn't exactly remember, but I knew she had a boyfriend. Jack looked at me, concerned.

"It's fine, she has a boyfriend anyways. Go make some money," I prompted him. I watched the girl exchange a few words with her boyfriend, then get up angrily, stomp over to Jack, grab his face, and kiss him. He didn't kiss her back, I noticed, but didn't stop her either. After I few seconds I had to avert my eyes. Obviously, I felt a little jealous, but I knew Jack was just playing the game I had told him he could play. And I knew it was just a game to him. I looked back just in time to see the girl pull away and throw a look at her boyfriend before reaching in her pocket and handing Jack two crumpled five dollar bills. He grinned triumphantly, and promptly kissed my cheek.

"Good job," I laughed. I honestly felt a lot better than I had expected to. I could tell it had meant nothing, and he hadn't even enjoyed it that much. He passed his turn to spin the bottle, instead letting someone else who hadn't gone yet have a turn. The game continued peacefully, and everyone was having fun. Well, until it was Finn's turn to spin. He had just lost ten dollars to Millie, who he had refused to kiss and stated "I'd pay ten dollars not to kiss her," which made her very mad, and everyone else very amused. He had simply shrugged, taken the bottle, and gave it a sharp spin. It made a few dizzying circles before it slowed down finally stopped facing Finn's opponent. Everything was silent for a moment. The bottle was pointed directly at me. I looked up at Finn with wide eyes. I saw him curse under his breath before making eye contact with me and smiling weakly.

"Is this ok?" I asked Jack without looking away from Finn.

"Of course. You let me play so I'm letting you," he reasoned.

"But it's Finn," I hissed.

"It's ok. It's ten dollars. And I trust you." I got up and approached Finn, who had already stood up.

"Hey," I said, tilting my head and stepping closer nervously.

"Is Jack ok with this?" he asked, keeping his distance.

"Yeah, he said it's just a game. A game where I win ten dollars," I smiled.

"I don't think so. I think I'm going to win," he responded playfully, taking a step closer.

"Oh really?"

"Yep. In fact-" Finn was cut off by someone yelling,

"Stop flirting and just kiss already!" Everyone laughed, and without any warning Finn grabbed my face and kissed me. Thoughts began racing through my head. The first one was, wow, kissing him hadn't changed at all. Then, but I have a boyfriend. Then, kissing Jack felt so much better. Then, but this wasn't so bad. Then, ok but he cheated on you. Then, yes but he just rejected Millie. And not you. Then, I have a boyfriend who I love. Then, finally, do I have feelings for Finn? I was pretty sure I didn't, but, why was I kissing him back? I think it was just for the game, right? I mean, this whole time I've been thinking about Jack. I frowned, before doing the only reasonable thing I could think of. I kissed him harder. He reacted likewise, matching my new pace. I searched for something, anything, that felt like something. One of his hands moved up to my hair, one to my waist, in the same routine we had used to do. He still tasted like mint and cigarettes. And I felt nothing. I mean, kissing Finn was nice, and alright, but not like Jack. Jack. Oh shit, Jack. I unceremoniously pulled away, guilt flooding my mind. He was staring down at me, but I couldn't read his expression.

"You owe me ten," he smirked. Before I responded, I looked at Jack with concern clearly etched across my face. He was watching with a calm expression. He didn't look thrilled, obviously, but he didn't look mad at all.

"Here," I said, fishing in my pocket and pulling out the first bill I grabbed, a twenty, and shoving it in Finn's hand. "Keep the change." I marched over to Jack, grabbed his arm, and pulled him down the hall and into the first empty room I found.

"I'm so sorry," I wailed, throwing myself into his arms once I'd slammed the door shut.

"Hey, it's ok," he said calmly. "I'm not mad."

"But I feel awful. I just, like, made out with your best friend, who's also my friend, who's also my ex, who cheated on me, in front of you. And for a second, just a second, I was scared there was something there. Something with him. That's so fucked up. I'm such a bad person," I rambled.

"Madison. Stop." He cupped my cheek and connected our lips, and I momentarily forgot everything that had just happened. "Did you feel that when you kissed him?" he asked, but he already knew the answer.

"No. No, of course not. I'd never-"

"I know. I'm not mad, Madison. It was just a dumb game. Everything's fine," he said, and I genuinely believed him.

-

authors note: hi! just an fyi im gonna try and update every two weeks, usually on a weekend. thanks for reading!