31st December 2016

Vikram heaved. He had been running from where the cab dropped him off and not entirely sure why he had to rush. He was just full of all this energy from the flight he had taken and the caffeine and sugar he had ingested that he needed to burn.

Now he stood on the streets, sighing deeply and calming his nerves before walking in. He could do it. He knew he could. Vikram didn't care if it was too late, perhaps.

He wobbled his fingers on his sides, waiting for his nerves to calm down but it wasn't doing anything.

The place was packed, as usual but he didn't care. Vikram walked in.

It was closing time and the people were beginning to leave the restaurant.

Theo was at the bar. He saw Vikram and recognized him immediately. Instead of offering him a table, Theo pointed upstairs like he knew what Vikram was here for.

Vikram smiled and thanked him before taking the stairs that would lead Vikram to Aditya's apartment. He stood outside the door, contemplating whether he should knock or just leave.

He shook his head. Vikram had run away from a lot of things in his life. But he won't this time.

Setting his resolve, he knocked.

In no time, the door opened and Aditya surfaced.

"Vikram?" Aditya asked, not entirely sure if he was imagining things.

"Hi." Vikram said.

"H... hi."

Vikram gave out a nervous laugh. "Hi."

"You already said that."

Vikram was sure they'd had the exact conversation before, he just couldn't remember when. "Yes" Vikram said, "I did, didn't I?"

Aditya looked at him for a moment. "Would you like to come in?"

Vikram thought about it for once but shook his head. "No, I think I'll be easier if I am out here."

"Why?"

"Because you can choose to shut the door on my face when I am done."

Aditya did not understand so Vikram continued.

"I have been stupid." Vikram went on. "So, so stupid all these years. You told me once to talk to you directly if I thought you did something wrong but instead of doing that, I chose to believe what I heard. I knew you loved me but I still chose to believe otherwise."

"Vikram..."

"No..." Vikram said. "Let me finish. You know why I still carry the key around? Because I can't get rid of it. Because I can't get rid of you and believe me, I've tried. I go to that house every month. I have been going since you left and I don't plan to stop anytime soon."

Aditya smiled a little.

"I am sorry I made you believe that I didn't love you back then." Tears flowed down Vikram's eyes. "I am sorry you had to leave thinking that you and I were done. We were not. Believe me. I loved you, with everything I had."

"Then why didn't you come to the airport?" Aditya asked.

"I did." Vikram said, "I mean I had left for the airport but..." his voice trailed off. "I was on my way to see you when... when my dad..."

"Oh god." Aditya said, clasping his hands to his mouth. "Vikram, I am so sorry."

Vikram shook his head. "I want you to know that I had every intention of being there, Aditya." Vikram wiped tears away from his face that surfaced back right again. "I found your notes, the ones you'd left in my books at the library. I realized I was wrong, and that you had loved me way, way before we even became friends. But I couldn't. And I am sorry for that."

"Vikram..." Aditya said and tried to reach out but Vikram stopped him. He needed to get the words out before he needed comfort.

"You weren't supposed to leave without knowing how much I loved you. It's all my fault."

"No, Vikram. None of this is your fault."

Vikram shook his head again. "If I hadn't believed Mohit, if I had just figured things out a little sooner, we wouldn't have been apart for ten years." Vikram breathed heavily. "I should have tried harder to look for you after you were gone. I tried to forget you, I have been trying for ten years, but I have failed every single time. And I don't want to anymore."

Aditya didn't quite understand. "What do you mean?"

Vikram sighed. "I don't want to try to forget you, Aditya, because I still love you."

Aditya froze. "You... you still love me?"

Vikram laughed, wiping all his tear away and shrugged. "I do." He said. "And I am not afraid to let the world know this time."

"Wait..." Aditya said, he was having a hard time believing that this was actually happening.

Vikram cut Aditya off. "Just like the first time, I will tell you again. I don't want your answer. I am not here for that. I am here only to tell you that I have been very stupid for the past ten years. You may have moved on and you may have someone else in your life but I needed to get this out for myself."

"For yourself?"

"Yes." Vikram said. "So you can shut the door on my face."

Vikram waited, for something, anything that would tell him what Aditya was thinking. They stared at each other, for the longest time possible and Vikram was sure, that Aditya was ask him to leave.

Blinking away, Vikram suddenly felt exposed and stupid for having said that all out loud. Aditya wasn't even trying to say something.

"I... I'll get going." Vikram said and immediately turned to rush down the stairs but before he could, Aditya's hands caught him by the wrist and before Vikram could react, he was being pinned to the wall in the hallways, with Aditya's lips firmly pressed on his.

Vikram felt a thousand bolts run down his body and his hand found a way around Aditya's neck. If Vikram thought he had been parched the last time he was in Lyon, boy that was nothing compared to what he felt right now. It was like he had been travelling for miles and miles in a desert for ten years, only to finally find water now.

Slowly, Aditya pulled away. "I never moved on from you." He said, whispering the words softly on Vikram's lips. "There is no one else in my life." he said. "There never was after you, and there never will be."

God did Vikram feel his legs turn to jelly.

"Say it again." Aditya said.

"Say what?"

"That you love me."

Vikram smiled. "I love you. I love you so goddamn much, Aditya."

Aditya stacked his head against Vikram's and kissed the bridge of his nose. "I love you so goddamn much too."

Vikram sat in the living room while Aditya went to make him some hot chocolate. It was freezing but the fireplace in the living room was a comfort.

Aditya surfaced with two mugs and sat down next to Vikram.

"Drink this." he said and Vikram followed.

The hot chocolate washed down with a wave of warmth across Vikram's body.

"What made you come here in the middle of winter in the middle of the night?"

"Well it was daytime when I left India."

Aditya laughed and turned to Vikram. "I can't believe you're here." he said. "Tell me you're here."

Vikram placed his hand on Aditya's cheeks.

"I am here." Vikram said and Aditya turned in to kiss the inside of his wrist. Vikram closed his eyes. He had missed this so much.

"How... how are you here?"

"It's a long story." Vikram said. "That involves lots of whiskey, a call with Ruvee, a last minute flight, a few cab rides and a train, then another cab."

Aditya was in awe of this ridiculously wonderful person. A person who was his, entirely.

"You must be tired" Aditya said, "Why don't you go to sleep for now?"

"No" Vikram said, "I don't want to. I want to stay here and talk."

Aditya smiled. "We can talk tomorrow."

Vikram shook his head. "I am scared that if I sleep, I'll wake up to find this all as a dream."

"This is not a dream." Aditya said and pulled Vikram by the hand to take him into his room. "Trust me."

Vikram followed, trailing behind Aditya as he opened the door to his room.

Vikram entered, staring at the room in awe. There were books everywhere, a large window in front, a bed on the opposite a desk in the corner and then Vikram saw the wall and what was hanging on it. A single photo pay stuck to the wall and Vikram couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was the photo Vikram had taken of Aditya, shirtless all those years ago. It was the photo from the film Aditya had stolen from Vikram. He had the photo developed and framed on his wall.

"Aditya..." Vikram said, turning to him and Aditya wrapped Vikram in his arms. "You've kept this all these years?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't I? It was the first thing I got from you."

"Took." Vikram corrected. "Rather stole. You stole that film."

"Doesn't matter. It was yours, so of course I kept it."

Vikram rolled his eyes and took a spin around the room when his eyes fell on a stack of magazines in one corner.

"Are those...?" Vikram asked Aditya and Aditya nodded.

"Oh my god!" Vikram said, rushing to the magazines and pulling them out. There were over 25 of them.

"You had no idea the trouble I had to go through to get some of these." Aditya said.

Aditya had really collected each magazine that had featured Vikram's photos since he began his professional photography career. But the struggle to keep the tears at bay began when Vikram saw how the shelf by the bed had Vikram's old Olympus sitting on it and right next to the shelf, was the desk, on top of which rested the leather bag Vikram had gifted Aditya all those years ago.

Vikram was in utter disbelief. "And all these years I thought you'd forgotten about me."

"It's impossible to forget you, Vikram." Aditya said.

Vikram felt something warm rise up inside of him when he heard Aditya, but it stopped when Aditya continued.

"Because I have an eidetic memory, you know?" he teased.

Vikram turned around immediately. "I'm going back to India." He said playfully.

Just as he was about to step away, Aditya hugged him from behind and wrapped Vikram tight in his arms. Aditya left a kiss of Vikram's cheeks, and Vikram was instantly overwhelmed by emotions. How had he lucked out and found a person like Aditya in his life?

Moving close, Aditya breathed right next to Vikram's ear. "But I can't forget you because there is no one else like you. No one I can love as much as I love you and no one, I'd want to be with apart from you. You ruined me, Vikram."

Vikram breathed the words in. One day, sometimes in the future, Vikram would sit Aditya down and tell him how he too, had ruined Vikram for the rest of the world.

Aditya took Vikram's hand and asked him to take some rest.

Vikram didn't argue. He would do just about anything Aditya asked him to right now. Once Vikram was comfortably tucked under the comforter, Aditya sat next to him.

"Why do you look so thin?" he asked, brushing his hair against Vikram's hair lightly. "Have you been skipping breakfast again?"

"I never really like breakfast anyway. But that's not it. I... I've been having trouble sleeping the past couple of months. I guess that took a toll on my health."

Aditya left a peck on Vikram's forehead. "I am not letting you out of this bed till you're rested."

"Lie down next to me." Vikram whispered, already feeling the tiredness of the day washing all over him.

Aditya walked over to the other side and did as Vikram asked.

They were both lying on the bed now, facing each other. Aditya didn't let his eyes off Vikram even for a second. Vikram wished he too could keep staring at Aditya for an indefinite amount of time but his eyelids were beginning to get heavier.

"What did you mean when you said you should have tried harder to look for me when I was gone?" Aditya asked after a while.

Vikram smiled. "I came to Paris once, a few years after you left. To look for you at your university."

Aditya's eyes widened in surprise. "You did? Why didn't I see you then?"

Vikram yawned. "I saw you. You were getting out of a class and you were with your friends, laughing and talking. You just... looked so happy that I thought I'd ruin that if I approached you."

"No, Vikram, you can never ruin anything."

Vikram scooted over until his head was rested against Aditya's chest. "Maybe. But I didn't know that back then. So I just left."

"I am glad you approached me now."

Vikram laughed. "Yeah, worked out, didn't it?"

Aditya was just about to answer when his phone flared up with a ding.

"It's Ruvee." Aditya said. "She's wondering if you reached safely."

"Tell her I didn't reach safely but I am fairly safe now." Vikram teased with a sleepy grin.

Aditya typed back the message when he got another one from Ruvee.

"Umm Vikram?"

"Hmm?" Vikram asked in a low murmur.

"Did you really tell Ruvee Gabriel is hotter than me?"

Vikram didn't answer, instead, shut his eyes tight.

"Well?" Aditya asked, staring at him, "Did you?"

"I can't hear you, I am asleep."

"Like hell you are." Aditya said. "Go get Gabriel to sleep next to you then."

With this, Aditya pulled himself away and was about to get out of the bed when Vikram yanked him by the arm and pulled him right back in. Vikram had forgotten how jealous Aditya got when it came to Vikram. This feeling of warmth felt new because it had been over ten years since he'd last felt something like this. He drew Aditya closer and wrapped his arms around him.

"I don't want Gabriel. I want you."

"Yeah, why's that?"

"Because I want to spend the rest of my life with you, not him."

For a few seconds, Aditya felt like his senses had been knocked right out of him. Slowly he composed himself. "But I am hotter than him, right?"

"We'll talk about this when I wake up." Vikram said with a smile, pulling Aditya closer and finally falling into a deep state of peaceful slumber.

A/N- Epilogue coming out tomorrow