May 2005

The days were beginning to get hotter and hotter and it was getting impossible to sit through a class without having to sweat through every pore in the body, only to feel flushed and dehydrated and no matter how much water Vikram drank, it was never enough.

Vikram and Aditya had received a stunning 98/100 on their English project and even Mr. Jha was impressed by the work they had put in.

"I knew this plan would work." Mr. Jha said in the class as he handed out the papers just before the period was about to end. "I knew you'd be able to put your differences aside and work together."

It looked like he would tear up. He flipped the paper in his hand and showed it to the class. "I did that." he said, pursing his lips and nodding in glee.

"Such a romantic." Vikram whispered to himself, shaking his head but apparently it was loud enough for Aditya to hear. He sharply turned to look at Vikram but then got up, walked to the front of the class and snatched the paper from Mr. Jha in annoyance before coming back to his seat.

"Anyway..." Mr. Jha began. "You all have your midterms next month and I know you all are under pressure to perform well but don't forget to take a break every once in a while. Studies are important, but so is your health. And if you have anything you want to talk about or would like to share, I will be in my office."

The bell rang and everyone dispersed quickly, including Vikram.

The past few days had been surprisingly good. Vikram liked hanging out with Aditya in the library but they had completed the project last week so there was no need for them to hang out anymore. He thought of going to the clubroom but just before walking out of the class, he turned once, only to find Aditya looking at him, perhaps wanting to talk.

But Vikram's nervousness acted up and wanting to avoid talking to Aditya in his jittery state, Vikram decided to go home instead.

The truth was, he had been avoiding Aditya since that night at Ruvee's place a week ago. He still had no explanation for what had happened or why Aditya had leaned in far too close to Vikram's liking. Vikram didn't understand why his heart had skipped a beat or why the smell of musk and lemons and spices had intoxicated him. And he didn't want to address ir or talk about it because it was embarrassing as it was.

He didn't want to add to his misery by acknowledging it in front of Aditya.

So every day for a week since the project submission, Vikram had found something else to do after school instead. Either it was staying with Ruvee in the press room, helping her with articles or staying in the library, helping Mrs. Sengupta with cataloguing. But he was never alone where Aditya would find him and perhaps do what he did again, or even worse, talk about it. If Aditya noticed that Vikram was avoiding him, he didn't care about it. Or so he told himself.

But on this particular day, Ruvee wasn't staying back and Mrs. Sengupta was on leave so Vikram decided to go home instead.

Deepak was perched out in front of the TV, like always, watching the news. Vikram stood by the foyer and looked at his father for some time. The man, who had built empires of the best luxurious hotels in the country, who was always on his toe, was reduced to nothing but an armchair and a TV.

Vikram was about to go upstairs to his room when his father saw him and called for him. Slowly, Vikram walked into the living room.

"Have a seat." he said and Vikram did. The authoritative tone in his voice was something that had existed for so long, that it had become his nature.

"I talked to a friend of mine this morning." Deepak continued. "He suggested that New Zealand might be the best place for your undergrads in Hospitality."

Vikram closed his eyes. They had this exact same conversation on the first day of this school year. His dad had been completely lucid that particular morning. "The country is a hub for hospitality and tourism and I think it will suit you well. You loved it when we went there, didn't you?"

And then everything had gone to hell when they had come back.

"I'll think about it." Vikram said, in a low voice.

"What is there to think about?" Deepak asked. "It's already decided. Get over with your 12th quickly and I'll make arrangements."

The first time they had this conversation, Vikram had flipped out on him and walked out of the house in anger. He still regretted it so maybe this was his chance to set it right.

"Fine" Vikram said, conceding. It was not like his dad would remember this conversation after some time or tomorrow. "I'll go to New Zealand."

At that moment, Vikram realized that perhaps it was a good thing anyway. It was not like he had set any plans for himself. It was not like he had found his calling and figured out what he wanted to do in the future. Maybe it was alright that his father was planning this for him. Maybe an escape would be good. From this house, from his father, from the pressure, from... Aditya.

"That's more like it." Deepak said and got back to watching the news like the conversation never happened.

Vikram sighed and decided to go to his room instead. Any appetite that had when he reached home, was now lost. Picking his backpack, Vikram slowly ascended the steps. The first thing he noticed when he reached his room was that across from it, Vaibhav's door was slightly ajar which was odd because his door was always, always closed. And then he heard Vaibhav's voice.

"Mom," he yelled, "Can't you see you're suffocating me?"

The next moment, Vikram's stepmother walked out of Vaibhav's room and shut the door behind her. She looked at Vikram and gave an empathetic smile. "Talk to your brother, will you?"

It wasn't a command or anything, just a desperate plea.

Vikram nodded.

Meera went downstairs and Vikram dropped his bag on the ground before reaching Vaibhav's door.

He gently knocked.

"Just leave me alone." Vaibhav cried from inside.

"It's me." Vikram said and silence followed. Taking this as an affirmation, Vikram turned the knob and walked in. Vaibhav sat on his bed, flipping the pages of a book angrily.

Vikram looked around. Vaibhav's room was as neat as a hospital's and it seemed obvious because Meera had taken special care in making sure the room was spotless and dust-free. All for the good health of Vaibhav. Vikram's own room stood in contrast with clothes thrown in reckless abandon, school books and notebooks scattered everywhere, shoes lying wherever they landed when Vikram took them off and an accumulation of dust that lived in his room rent-free.

"What do you want?" Vaibhav asked, surprising Vikram a little. Vaibhav was obviously very enraged because Vikram had never seen him talk like that. It made him seem the most human he had ever been. Vikram was so used to seeing Vaibhav act perfect, that this, right here, was quite unexpected.

"What was that about?" Vikram asked, pointing to the door that Meera had just walked out of.

"Nothing." Vaibhav said.

Vikram walked to the accent chair by the window and took a seat. "She wanted me to talk to you." he said after a few moments of silence.

"And try and convince me to stay at home?"

"What are you talking about?"

Vaibhav scoffed. "Like you don't already know."

"I don't." Vikram said.

Vaibhav clenched his jaw and released it after a while. "She wants me to be homeschooled even after 10th." he said.

"And you don't want to?" Vikram asked.

"What do you think?"

"But isn't it risky for you to be out?"

Vaibhav closed his eyes and shook his head. "I am not a kid anymore. I know there are things I am allowed to do and things I am not. It's not like I will suddenly start playing football after I enroll."

"Did you tell her that?" Vikram asked.

"I did, but she won't listen."

"Maybe it's for your best."

Vaibhav laughed but it was a humourless laugh. "You don't get to tell me what's best for me." he said sharply. "Are you ever home except when it's time for you to sleep? Do you know what it feels like to live in this cage twenty-four-seven?" he went on. "Do you even care, what happens to me?"

"Of course I care." Vikram said in a protest but Vaibhav was right. He was never at home and he definitely did not know what it was like to be a prisoner in your own house.

"It doesn't seem like you do." Vaibhav spat immediately.

"Listen, I..." Vikram began but Vaibhav held his hand out to stop him.

"I am tired." Vaibhav interjected. "Shut the door when you leave."

Vikram did not know what else to do so he walked out of Vaibhav's room, just as he had walked in.

Sitting by the classroom window and watching Aditya run his laps was a habit Vikram had to break himself out of. How long was he going to keep doing this when his new agenda in life was to avoid him? It was difficult because that one hour that Vikram had to himself, was the only time he got to see Aditya as much as he wanted without having to avoid him. He argued with himself that it was his time and he could choose to do whatever he wanted with it but the idea of watching Aditya work out only to avoid him all day didn't really make sense to him. So he convinced himself that it needed to be stopped.

When Vikram walked into the school the next day, instead of going to the class, he went to the clubroom instead. No traces of Aditya there.

Not wanting to think about Aditya, Vikram decided to clean the equipment that he needed to be prepped for the football match the next day.

The rusty old fan on the ceiling rotated with as much noise as it could but it didn't do anything to cool the room. It was the middle of summer and every second felt like living inside a volcano. About half an hour into cleaning the cameras and tidying up the darkroom, Vikram felt the need for some water.

"Oh fuck!" he exclaimed to himself, recalling that his bag and water bottle were in the classroom where he had kept them before coming here. He felt lazy and didn't want to climb down two flights of stairs and then back up. But it was hot as hell and Vikram felt parched. He was about to get up and go to his class his eyes fell on the door.

Standing there in his workout clothes was Aditya, looking straight at him.

"What are you doing here instead of the classroom?" Aditya asked.

Vikram scrunched his eyebrows. Did Aditya know that Vikram watched him from the class every day?

The volcanic heat couldn't hold a candle against what Vikram felt when Aditya asked him that. He fanned himself, trying to calm down. He glanced up at the fan once, wondering if it was even working. It was, but it wasn't helping Vikram.

"Why aren't you running laps?" Vikram asked back when he realized that there was no escaping Aditya's unwavering gaze.

Aditya walked inside the room, crossed the abandoned empty desks in between and stood in front of Vikram. "Here." Aditya said, handing Vikram his water bottle.

Vikram, parched and still sweating, took the bottle immediately and began gulping every drop down.

"Slow..." Aditya said, almost in a whisper. "Or you'll choke."

And Vikram did choke. Because it didn't sound like Aditya was talking about water, at all.

He coughed and Aditya rushed over, patting him on his back to let the breathing go in and out in a rhythm.

"I am fine." Vikram said, pulling himself away from Aditya almost instantly.

Aditya, not saying a word, took his bottle back and kept it in his bag. Vikram noticed that the worn-out bag was almost in shreds.

The tension in the air was fervent and Vikram felt it in every fibre of his body.

"You... you still haven't told me why you are not running laps." Vikram said, trying to ease into a comfortable space. "Don't you have a match tomorrow?"

"You still haven't told me why you're not in class." Aditya said instead.

"I had equipments to clean." Vikram said, relieved that it wasn't a lie and that he actually had equipment laid out to back his story.

"I didn't feel like running today." Aditya said and walked to the shelf where Vikram had his cameras. There were a total of three. A Canon EOS Rebel 2000 which belonged to the school, a Nikon D70 that he frequented at the events at school and...

"Olympus OM-1?" Aditya asked, picking it up and examining it. Vikram was surprised that of all the three, Aditya had chosen this one. Usually people like the bulky and most recent Nikon. "It looks old." Aditya said.

"It is" Vikram said, walking over. "It was my mother's."

"Was?" Aditya asked.

Vikram nodded. "She died a long time ago."

"I am sorry."

Vikram shook it off with a wave of his hand. "It's fine. I didn't even know her."

"How come?"

"She died when I was born."

Aditya looked at the camera again. "Did she like photography too?"

Vikram nodded "I think. I don't know much about her."

Saying it out loud felt weird. No one had asked Vikram this question before. There wasn't much Vikram knew about his own mom so he wasn't sure what else to say.

"Who gave it to you?" Aditya asked, pointing at the camera

Vikram shook his head. "I don't remember." He said, trying to recall. "Probably my dad or my step-mom."

"You've never asked them about your mom?"

Vikram took a pause. He didn't have any reason to tell Aditya the details of his personal life, but for some reason, he wanted to. "My dad and I don't get along too well and my stepmom's..."

"Evil?"

Vikram laughed. "No. She's not evil. She's..." he thought about it for a moment. "She's quite nice actually it's just that I don't think I fit well with them so I keep my distance."

"You keep distance from your own family?"

Vikram looked at him and seemed lost. It sounded so weird, admitting this out in the open. Anyone would think he was heartless.

"Can I take a photo with this?" Aditya asked, not even waiting for Vikram's answer, which was a relief to him, really. Vikram didn't know how he'd reply to what Aditya had asked.

"Sure." Vikram said, and reached over. "It's already set for natural light so all you need to do is turn the lever."

"This right here?" Aditya asked, pointing to the small lever at the right corner of the camera and Vikram nodded.

"The lever advances your film so you have to push that after every shot." Vikram said. He then pointed to a tiny button just above it, "That's the shutter. You press that each time you want to shoot something."

Aditya nodded, turned the lever to the right until it stopped automatically and then released it. The spring set back in place almost immediately. He brought the camera near his eye and looked through. "What should I take a photo of?"

Vikram shrugged. "Anything you like."

Aditya's finger hovered over the shutter as he spun around the room until the camera landed on Vikram. He looked at the familiar make of the freckled boy for a second too long but then, almost immediately set the camera down. least

"Do you want to bunk school today?" he asked instead.

Vikram's eyes widened in response. "And do what?"

"Anything." Aditya said. "We could bring your camera too."

Vikram considered this for a moment. He had never actually bunked school before. Not consciously at and the offer seemed tempting until he realized that it would require him to be with Aditya all day, alone. Well possibly alone because he didn't know what Aditya had in mind. And when Vikram thought about it, his heart unexpectedly fluttered.

Aditya and him, all day, doing whatever Aditya wanted?

Vikram involuntarily shook his head. Whatever this was, wherever this was going, was definitely wrong. "I can't." he said. "Exams are next month."

Aditya set the camera back on the shelf, carefully and cautiously and then looked Vikram dead in the eye.

"Are you avoiding me?"

Vikram did not know what sound came out of his mouth but it was a horrid cross between a grunt and a scoff. "No, I'm not." he said and looked away from Aditya.

But Aditya was not convinced. "Did I do something to offend you?" he asked in a very different voice than Vikram had heard before. It was almost pleading. "Is it about the money for the books?"

Vikram shot back a glance at him. What was Aditya even thinking?

"Aditya..." Vikram whispered. "That's not what it is about."

"Just wait for a few more days till I get my paycheck. It is not nearly enough so I was waiting to put in more before I started paying you back."

"No," Vikram said, almost begging, wondering how to make Aditya believe that it was not about the money. "It's not about that, okay?" Vikram asked. "Do you really think I am that petty?"

In response, Aditya shrugged. "I don't have enough information to confirm or deny that."

This made Vikram laugh out so loud, he threw his head back in the air. "You're such an asshole." Vikram said, shaking his head and closing his eyes.

When he opened them, Aditya was looking at him, grinning.

Damn that grin.

When Vikram saw Aditya like that, all his resolve of avoiding the football player came crashing down. What was he even thinking trying to stay away from him? It was not physically possible. Aditya was everywhere. He was every waking thought in Vikram's mind.

"Can you just do one thing for me?" Aditya asked, bringing Vikram back to the present.

"Hmm?"

"If in case I do offend you, can you please talk to me instead of avoiding me?"

Vikram did not know what to say to this. Of course, he would talk to Aditya instead.

"I know we're not friends yet, but I will appreciate it if you told me things directly to my face. I've had enough of people avoiding me for one lifetime"

Vikram found himself nodding immediately. "I promise." he said and smiled. Even though he knew Aditya had not asked him to make any promises, Vikram made them anyway.