I scroll through my messages on the way home. My Instagram DMs are full of people talking about Josh and I mindlessly heart each message, not bothering to reply to any of them. I've already gone through TikTok, the edits on there are awful but I liked them anyway and left a few heartfelt comments. So when James Miller of all people shows up in my DMs, I actually read it properly instead of skimming it.

hey eve, i heard about josh. so sorry for your loss, you two were great together.

He must've sent the same message, or at least a similar one, to all of Josh's close friends.

And suddenly, an alternative route flashes before my eyes. If James hadn't thanked me for the kiss (I hope for his sake that he learnt not to do that in future), maybe it could've led to something. Maybe instead of Josh being the first guy I fell in love with, it would've been James. The breakup would've happened at the same time, that's for sure. When he moved to Norfolk, leaving a huge gap in our form. But it would've been mutual, an agreement that we couldn't last miles apart.

And I wouldn't have told Eden that I'd like to see him dead.

And she wouldn't be crazy enough to go all the way to Norfolk if I did. Or if she did, it would've been easier to catch her because train stations have cameras and people would be recognised a strange girl with a thick Brummie accent in the middle of the Norfolk countryside.

But that didn't happen. James said thank you and I lost interest and Josh swooped in.

thank you

"Alright, love?" Mom asks.

I nod. "Do you think she'll go to prison?"

She shrugs. "Sure, if they can prove she did it. Probably a young offenders thing or something."

I nod. "Okay."

The thought of Eden's younger siblings comes to mind. My mom and her mom were both young moms stuck in those shitty council flats. But while mine worked like hell to move us to a nicer place, Eden's didn't. She still lives there I'm pretty sure with her mom and her siblings, each dad out of the picture. And Eden being arrested for murder won't help at all.

"So are you revising once we get home?" Mom asks.

I shrug. "Probably."

My first exam is next Monday, it's Biology. Biology is the science I like the best, the only one where I actually tolerate my teacher each lesson. Josh liked Biology, there's quite a bit of Biology in Sports Science apparently and he was good at it. He won't be able to get that expected eight or nine in his GCSE.

He won't get any grades at all.

I bite my lip hard to stop the tears from falling.