∞ ϟ

Draco seemed to have gotten better at scheduling secret rendezvous.

Instead of trying to sneak into my common room, or making funny faces across the potions classroom, he managed to finally think of an easier approach—owling a note.

I just didn't know why he chose the Astronomy Tower. Sure, it had a great view, but the Room of Requirement usually suited us best. There we would have complete assurance that it was only us, and that our secrets wouldn't pass through the stone walls and spin into rumors.

Pulling my sweater tighter against my chest, I ascended the metal staircase, my heart beating with excitement. I couldn't wait to see him again...it felt like ages since we last spoke.

And then I saw a familiar figure lingering by the ledge.

"You couldn't have chosen somewhere warmer to meet?" I shuddered, stepping up out into the chilly air, "it's awfully cold up here, Draco."

But then I realized who it was.

The familiarity of their presence flew over my head like a plane, and I didn't realize who was really standing in front of me until the moonlight caught them in a trance.

"Sorry to disappoint," Harry frowned, "but I'm not Malfoy."

Oh my god.

Suddenly I felt a swelling rise up into my throat, suffocating me out of any thoughts and words for a moment of pure panic. The boy's glasses seemed to reflect the pure disdain radiating off of his face, and the evident frown sent me stepping backwards towards the stairs.

I wasn't ready for this.

I never wanted to be ready for this.

"No," I mumbled under my breath, "Harry, not here, not now, not...ever, just please leave me alone."

I had to shut it down before it escalated! I knew Harry had a horrible jealous habit, and my accidental confirmation made it clear I had been hiding my relationship for a long time.

He clenched his jaw, "come here, [y/n]."

"No," I whimpered, shaking my head, "I'm not talking about this."

"Come here."

"Harry..."

"I'm not going to tell you three times," he spat out, "either you do as I say, or I'm going to handle Malfoy myself."

This is what I was afraid of. Harry's possessiveness. My heart broke for his past; the loss of his parents, and the pain the Dursley's put him through, which made him cling onto whatever he could just to give him a sense of stability.

But I...was scared of it. Being the thing that held him up all the time, because I knew my heart had other priorities.

"Tell me," he seethed, "does he love you like I do?"

Hah.

"No," I said bluntly, unconsciously stepping forward, "he loves me better."

I guess something snapped in me unexpectedly. Months of pent up anger and annoyance all boiling over at this very moment. He couldn't do anything about it now. He knew. Even if he didn't accept it, he knew, and now Draco and I couldn't stop hiding.

But it was the wrong thing to say.

Quicker than I could blink, I felt Harry's hand wrap around my wrist, pulling me harshly towards him. I winced, the feeling of his nail digging into my skin.

"How long has this been going on?" He scowled, his voice rough, "how long?"

"Harry, you're hurting me!"

"How long? Just tell me!"

Draco had never touched me like that. He never hurt me. Seeing Harry in this way gave me the answer I had been trying to solve for so long. Harry didn't care when it came to how I felt, yet Draco did, even before we really knew each other. Draco held his temper in front of me.

He may have gotten pissed in the beginning, but he never, ever, hurt me.

"Ten months!" I shot back, "is that what you want to hear?"

Harry let go of my hand quickly, realization flashing over his eyes. There was no going back, there was no changing things, and there was no chance he could ever win me back now.

He let out a string of curses, slamming his hand onto the metal lege of the astronomy tower and placing his head in his palms. He was angry, but I didn't sympathize for his reasons.

"Out of all people," he muttered, "you chose Draco?"

Something about those words seemed oddly familiar—like a warning of such, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"Loving someone isn't a choice, Harry," I said, my arm stinging from where he hurt me, "though I wouldn't expect you to know that, considering you only saw me as your side-piece this whole time."

"Right. Yeah, brilliant," he looked up with a scowl, "now you're playing the victim?"

"And you're not?"

"And you are?"

"You're my best friend," I said, narrowing my eyes spitefully, "I have always been clear about our relationship, showing you I'm hesitant and uncomfortable, yet you always pull stunts in front of half the school to show them that you've got a girlfriend."

He scoffed, "stunts?"

"I am not something you can use, just so the Chosen One doesn't look like he can't score a girl!"

"That's not why I like you!"

"Yeah, because you don't like me," I spat out, "you only think you do, because people have pressured you into it!"

I didn't give him a chance to respond, before I decided to let it all loose. Stomping up to him, I slid up the sleeve of my shirt to show him my arm. It was already starting to bruise from where he had gripped too hard, a deep red flush marking where his fingers were.

I'm just going to say it, I'm pissed.

"I don't care if you like me, or if you're my best friend, or some stranger I met five minutes ago," I said, my face burning with emotion, "if you actually cared about me, you wouldn't have hurt me!"

When he saw what he had done, I saw fear flicker across his eyes. He didn't mean to do it, but it was too late.

"[y/n]," he mumbled, "I'm so sorry...."

Harry had a temper.

I knew him for long enough to know that, and I knew he was regretting everything at that very moment, but it wasn't enough. Ten months of pent up emotions, hiding the truth from the world because of him, overflowed me to brim. I couldn't contain it anymore.

"You don't get to say you're sorry to me," I continued, "I stood by you, regardless if I was with Draco or not."

"[y/n]..."

"I've supported you, helped you, and I have always been your friend when you needed it most, regardless of how it affected my life," I hissed, "yet you can't be here for me now?"

Harry was silent.

"You can't be there for me, when it hurts you."

The deafening silence coming out of the boy's aura was enough to tell me that he got the message. He knew what I said was completely true, and now that I wasn't afraid to tell it to him straight, things were going to change.

For the better? I don't know.

I don't care.

I continued, "Draco has always been there for me, and even though we aren't perfect, whenever I need help he's there."

Harry didn't say a word.

"So I don't need you anymore," I said, striding away from the boy, "goodbye, Potter."