《JAHS/ELEY》Chapter 58: Hand Me A Buckshot And Shoot Me A Nigger
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"We are not going." Stokeley says with an attitude. "Why would you even ask if she's married anyway?"
"Stoke, the topic would've probably cake up anyway, you know i'm cool with Michael and if she didn't invite me, he would've." I replied.
He sighed, "You should've just said that you don't want to come."
I rolled my eyes, "YOU should've just said that there isn't nobody roaming this earth named Jahsayla that you're in a relationship with." J snapped back.
"This isn't about me, Jah." He replies. "Why'd you accept this..thing? She's already claiming his last name."
"Well..it's good for them that they're getting married." I said.
"Still. We're not going."
I sighed dramatically, "Now we're gonna look like some pussy ass bitches for not going." I whined.
"Jahseh, does it really matter if we're pussies or not?"
"Yes. Because it's strictly dickly over here. But it appears I am currently in a relationship with. a pussy."
Stokeley just crosses his arms at me.
"Ugh. Whatever. Ayleks is going to be over soon, and Kim said he wanted to talk so I'm going home. I'll see you later." I said opening the door to his apartment to leave.
"Bye, Jah."
"Bye, pussy." I replied and closed the door.
"I hate you, Jahseh!" I hear Stokeley yell from inside. I chuckle and start walking to my apartment.
When I reach my door, the door is already opened. Weird. I probably forgot to lock it when I left. I walk in and close the door and make sure to lock it. I hear talking from another room, I stop what i'm doing to listen.
It sounds like Kim and someone else.
"What do you think everyone would think if we said we were a thing?" I hear Kim ask.
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A thing?
"They'd be shocked..everyone is just suddenly gay anyway, so who the fuck are they about to judge."
Jared?
"Right. I talked to Jahseh today. He had to go get Gazzy and Omar from the airport." Kim says.
I'm still eavesdropping on them y'all.
"Oh, yeah. Omar told me that Jahseh ran into Michael and Valerie and they invited him and all of us to their fucking wedding." Jared says.
"They're engaged? What the fuck." Kim replies.
"Not just that, but after everything they have the audacity to invite Jahseh to their wedding. That's actually foul, I'd really beat the shit out of Michael." Kim says irritably.
"And Valerie?"
"She can have it too, the fuck." Kim says jokingly, making Jared laugh.
"You're funny." Jared says, them leaning towards each other for a passionate kiss.
Cuties.
"'I kNoW I DiDn'T wAlK iNtO JaHsEh aNd SToKeLeY MaKiNg OuT! THAT wOuLd Be aBsUrD!' faceass." I said interrupting their whole moment.
"Jahseh, h-how long have you been standing there?" Kim asks all shook and shit.
"Long enough." I said. I look at both their faces and they have an embarrassed look, like I didn't already know they weren't a thing. I find it adorable!
"So? You guys are together?" I asked them with a smile on my face. Kim scratches the back of his head,
"Uhm-I mean you could sa-"
Before Kim could finish his sentence, I let out the girliest squeal ever. I give them both a hug at the same time, pulling both their necks to my level, since i'm shorter than both of them.
"That's amazing! You guys are so fucking adorable. Gosh, I love love." I said excitedly.
They both chuckle awkwardly while hugging me back. I pulled away finally.
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"Is that what you wanted to talk about?" I asked.
"That, and the wedding that Omar and Gazzy mentioned to Jared now." Kim says.
"Oh. yeah that."
"You're going?" Jared asks me.
I sigh, "I don't know. Stoke is totally against me going, but I honestly want to go."
"Why? Don't you hate that Valerie bitch?" Kim asks.
"Well, not for her stupid ass. I wanna go for Michael too."
"Oh right, I forgot about 14 head." Jared says. "I mean..I wanna go. We can't be pussies and not go because we don't like Valerie."
That's what I was saying.
"Same. I've never been to a wedding, so this one is gonna be great, I already know." Kim says excitedly.
Yeah, if Kim says it's going to be great, I need to go see what is going to be so great so I HAVE to go.
"So that's 3 people that wanna go?" I said.
"Yeah, but if everyone else would like to go then.." Kim says trailing off.
"That leaves Stokeley." I finished his sentence.
"Right." Jared says.
"Well. Stokeley is coming whether his chunky ass wants to or not, and we're going to look like a bunch of fine ass niggas." I said excitedly.
"And eat!" Jared adds.
"Yes. And eat." I confirmed.
To be honest, I know Michael has done shit in the past to me, and Valerie and I disagree on literally everything, and I don't like that boxcar built bitch, I will still go crash the fuck out of their shit.
Because the party doesn't start until I, Jahseh Dwayne Ricardo Onfroy, walk in.
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